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Separation Anxiety(5)

By:Lisa Suzanne


“Jesus. Slow down,” Jesse said with a laugh, finishing off his beer and handing the waitress the empty glass as she handed him a fresh one. His voice was no longer low and intimate, close to my ear, and his hand was no longer on my arm. A brief chill prickled my skin where his hand had just been.

Quinn giggled from across the table. She knew that I thought Jesse was hot, but she had no idea what was really going on in my head.

“Long week,” I said weakly, trying to come up with some excuse as to why I’d just chugged down half of my vodka drink.

He nodded. “I get it. Every week in February tends to be long,” he said.

“How’s counseling seniors going this time of year?” I asked, changing the subject to something safer.

“Good. I’ve already contacted all of the parents of seniors in danger of failing, so hopefully they’ll get their asses in gear. How are your seniors?”

“Good. I don’t have any failing, and we’ve just been preparing like crazy for the AP test in May.”

“Do you think they’ll be ready?” he asked, taking a long sip of his drink.

“Fucking better be,” I grinned.

“They’ve got the best teacher in your department, so they’ll be fine.”

I blushed from the top of my head to the bottom of my toes.

“Stop,” I chided, and he grinned.

“I’m serious, V,” he said, his voice low and sexy again as he ran his hand through his hair. “You know how awesome you are, don’t you?”

I didn’t, not anymore. I had for a long time. I’d always been confident, but my relationship with Richard had taken that from me.

The waitress came back with my order of potato skins, so I was saved from having to answer his question. I watched him watch the waitress walk away, and I was reminded of his sexual tendencies. He glanced at my potato skins, covered in bacon and cheese and greasy goodness, and then he glanced up at me, a smirk curling his beautifully sculpted lips.

“You sharing those?” he asked.

I nodded. “Help yourself,” I said, even though I knew I could put the entire plate down myself.

He grinned, and I melted a little. I gulped down some more vodka.

“So that waitress?” he said, grabbing a potato skin and gesturing with it toward the woman who had just placed my food in front of me. I looked over at him and raised my eyebrows. “She likes it rough.”

I choked on some potato. Guess what I did to clear the blockage from my throat? Yep. Gulped down some more vodka.

He chuckled as he patted me on the back, and I was hyperaware of his hands on me again.

It wasn’t unusual to hear Jesse talk about sex, but hearing him talk about sex when I was realizing how serious my crush on him had become was a little too much for me. I suddenly wanted to know what rough with him was like. It wasn’t like I hadn’t imagined it before, but I had been on a sexual hiatus for over a year, and the last time I’d had sex with Richard wasn’t exactly pleasurable.

It had been our one year anniversary. You know how people say that once you get married, you never have sex again? Most married couples I knew weren’t like that at all. But once Richard and I got married, sex became a monthly chore. Before the wedding, it had always been great. Our first time together had been romantic and sweet, and each time after was always pleasurable. But with getting married came buying a house, working harder to make ends meet, and the stress that went along with all of those things. Most nights we were both simply too tired to do it, but we agreed that we needed a date night at least once a month. Our last “date night” was our first wedding anniversary. We’d both drank too much in anticipation of our monthly chore, and he passed out while he was still inside of me. I had to push him off of me and then the dramatic tears that come with too much drinking came, and I cried myself to sleep.

Something told me that with Jesse, I’d never cry myself to sleep.

I’d always go to sleep with a smile on my face.

My drink was empty, so I reluctantly called over the waitress who had been lucky enough to fuck the man sitting next to me.

“I’ll have another,” I announced when she came back. Her nametag said “Tami.”

“Another double?” she asked, and I shook my head.

“Single is fine,” I said, knowing I should slow down a little.

She scampered away after holding eyes a little too long with Jesse.

“That was a double?” Jesse asked, incredulous.

“Yeah. You got a problem with that?” I teased.

“Someone’s going to need to drive your drunk ass home.”

He was right. Another drink would put me in the unsafe driving zone, but I’d deal with it when it was time to leave. Quinn would take me home, and I’d figure out a way to get my car the next day. No big deal, I thought, even though I realized that it was kind of a big deal because it’s not like I’d be able to rely on my husband to help me pick up my car.