She could see in his eyes that he was struggling to hold on. He was waiting for her. Each painful thrust she felt him grow harder.
His grip around her wrists grew tighter the longer they went. But he didn’t give up. He slowed down, crashing his pelvis against her, pushing up against her firmly.
Oh God, how could feelings such as these exist? Her head screamed as he slowly brought her to finish, her body growing rigid as she climaxed. More and more…harder and harder he pulsed in her. The burning grew from a dull ache of pleasure to an intense sharp burning hunger.
Just a few more…
In those last moments of rapture, she let her heart go. “I want you forever,” she whispered.
“I do too Babe,” he responded, delivering the final thrust that drove them both over the line. She gritted her teeth as a cry of sheer pleasure escaped her lips, intense jolts of electric ecstasy wracking her body over and over endlessly.
She was pretty sure she felt him release within her. His back stiffened and he moaned loudly, pushing hard up in her with every orgasmic convulsion.
Not quite understanding the depth of emotions suddenly taking hold of her, she found herself sobbing. It wasn’t as if she were unhappy. As a matter of fact, it was quite the opposite.
Her tears flowed down flushed hot cheeks. She felt stupid and embarrassed to let him see, but as they collided together in those last sinful moments, she knew she shouldn’t care. Her heart was his. That’s how it would always be.
“My love,” he acknowledged the sparkling tears rolling down dark cheeks. He touched one with his hands after having let go of her wrists. He was still inside her.
“I’m sorry,” she wiped away her tears self-consciously. “I’m stupid and being a girl.”
“Why are you crying?” he looked genuinely concerned. “Are you okay?”
She nodded. Smiling a squinty smile, she touched his cheek with her hand. “I’m crying because I love you so much it hurts. It’s my own way of letting it out. Sometimes I don’t think I can handle how much I feel for you. It was perfect and I’m just being a silly hormonal woman.”
“I know how you feel,” he said, nuzzling her neck with his head.
Chapter12
Charles had decided to extend the vacation quite a while longer. With all things in consideration, everything had gone smoothly until his sleeping habits started to change. Sometimes Amber would wake up in the middle of the night to an empty bed as fitful dreams plagued him at night. Sometimes he would wake up yelling. But one night in particular he drew a knife and almost stabbed her in the chest. It was purely instinct but he couldn’t forgive himself for it.
Now he wouldn’t sleep with her at night. They would start off together, cuddling or making love, but then he would leave as soon as she had drifted off. He was afraid to hurt her.
Never had she ever felt so alone than those hours without her love in her bed. Those were the nights she discovered one more truth about her handsome fiancé. His PTSD was rooted much deeper than he had let on.
At first she was okay with it. She let him do his own thing and was satisfied with the few hours a night she was in his arms. But after a while it started to hurt not having him in bed with her. She could barely sleep now, sometimes waking up to his fitful dreaming all the way in the living room.
“Talk to me,” she had begged him one night. “Maybe it would make things better.”
It was one thing he refused to speak of. The horrors of wars past completely haunted him. What had triggered them, she didn’t know. But in a way it was her burden to bear as well as his. It began to take a toll on their relationship. The distance between them widened into a seemingly endless gap. She couldn’t take it anymore.
She retreated to her comfort zone and in the arms of her welcoming friends. She told Charles she needed some time to herself, which was a perfect excuse. He had been called to a business meeting in New York. It would be much better to stay with her friends than be alone.
Leaving the island, she took a plane back to New York where she was greeted with warmth and affection.
A lot had happened in the few weeks she was away. As she met up with her friends for a girl’s day out shopping, she had to search the crowd for a baby carriage now. This she would have to get used to.
Dressed in a pink blouse, white skirt, and glittery silver pumps, she walked in front of the endless clothing stores. A platinum credit card weighed heavy in her purse, tugging for her to spend endless amounts of money. This was probably the first time she had dared to go out with it. It was a present from Charles for this exact purpose. What a shopping spree today was going to be.