When it seemed the heaves were subsiding she reached to turn on the water, cursed when she noticed it was a hands free faucet and waved a hand back and forth over the sensor. The water started to flow and she scooped up a handful and splashed it on her face, reached for a second and cursed once more when the water stopped running. She waved the faucet on once more and got another handful of water. She wished it were cold instead of luke warm. She took a third handful and splashed her face once more, before she risked standing up. Her stomach ached.
She took a few slow breaths before she looked at herself in the mirror. Paige was horrified by her reflection. Her color was way off, her face red from the straining of the dry heaves. Her nose was running and she still had tears running down her face.
"What the hell is wrong with me? You need to get a hold of yourself," she said to the reflection in the mirror. She reached over and waved her hand repeatedly in front of the paper towel dispenser. It made a noise, its motor running, but no paper towels came out.
"Perfect, just perfect."
She opened the closest stall and pulled a large wad of toilet paper free. She did her best to clean up her face, wiping away the stray flecks of white as the toilet paper came apart.
"This is pathetic," she said to her reflection. "It's a good thing Nathan can't see..."
She shivered. She was no longer hot. In fact, she felt down right frigid. She was gripped by a sudden certainty that Nathan was gone. She saw it in her mind. She would exit the restroom and he would be gone. Only empty chairs and the middle-aged woman in the row across the way would be there to greet her.
She clenched her hands into fists and held them tightly at her side, trying to will away the fear. She blinked away her tears.
"Stop it," she hissed to herself and was pleasantly surprised when her body responded.
Her heart thundered in her chest as she walked to the exit. She hesitated for only a moment before exiting the restroom. A sob of relief escaped her lips when she saw Nathan's sleeping form exactly where she had left him.
She moved quickly over to join him, sitting in the chair next to him. He had his hands buried in his jacket pockets. She pulled gently on his left arm as he shifted. His hand came out of his pocket and something else came out with it. She saw a flash of silver and then it fell from her sight under his chair. She bent forward and reached for it.
Her breath caught in her chest when she pulled the silver cross and chain out from under the chair. It was the one she had looked at the other day. She didn't have to look at it too closely to tell, she just knew it. It was the one she'd seen that had reminded her of her mother's.
How?
She shook her head and looked from it to Nathan and back, a sad smile on her lips. He had gotten it for her. How had he known? How could he have known? She held it tightly in her hand, trying to decide what to do. A minute later she undid the clasp and put the necklace on. The weight of it against her chest felt reassuring, like a hug from her mother. She smiled at him, then without thinking about it, leaned over and gently kissed him.
For the next several hours she stayed glued to her spot beside him. More passengers arrived and she eyed them warily. Fear still filled her. The desire to run screaming down the concourse did not entirely leave and she didn't dare allow herself to fall asleep for fear that she would awaken and find him gone. But the comforting weight of the cross helped sustain her.
When the time came to board, she gently woke him. She couldn't tell if he noticed she was wearing the necklace or not and was unsure of just how to bring it up. He was still half-asleep and then after they had taken their seats in the cabin, he was all the way asleep once more. This time she didn't leave an empty seat between them. She sat in the middle, leaving the aisle seat clear.
She fidgeted in her seat until the plane had pulled away from the gate. She was certain something would happen. The plane would get called back to the gate and she would be escorted off and away from Nathan.
She began to relax only when the reassuring pressure of the takeoff pushed her back in her seat. As the jet lifted off into the air, she raised the armrest between them and before the aircraft reached cruising altitude she was asleep, nestled up against him with a sliver of a smile on her lips and a hand holding the cross against her chest.
CHAPTER FORTY
Julie rolled up to the closed wooden crossbar of the guardhouse in her battered Volvo. She recognized the man on duty. He was dressed in his blue uniform, crisply pressed. He stepped out of the guardhouse and smiled at her.
"Good morning," he said as he looked at his watch. "You are a little early."
Julie knew it was true. She had tossed and turned most of the night until finally giving up on sleep and had gotten out of bed and prepared for the day.