Second Chances(101)

He slipped back out of the bathroom briefly and then returned with his laptop and shut the door. He booted up the computer and returned to the website. He clicked from page to page rereading the information. He lingered on the story about his wife. He had spent the last year trying to forget that horrible night. Now he concentrated on remembering every detail.

They had planned on spending the night in. Paige had picked out several movies and they were going to eat dinner and then curl up together and watch them. He remembered that she had gotten a phone call while he was cooking dinner. She had said it had been a wrong number, but he had thought it had been too long of a call for a simple wrong number.

He frowned as he relived the night in his mind. Had that phone call meant anything? He had never given it much thought before. Who had been on the other side of that call?

After getting off the phone they had eaten dinner. Or rather, he had eaten dinner while Paige picked at hers. After dinner she had insisted that she needed to run out for a quick errand. He had asked her if she wanted him to go with her.

Nathan looked into the mirror and his puzzled expression looked back at him.

She had seemed conflicted at the offer. Hadn't she? He could tell that part of her really wanted him to go with her and part of her didn't. What was it he had seen in her eyes that night? Sadness? Fear? Something, something hadn't seemed quite right, but he had ignored it. He had fooled himself into believing nothing was wrong. After all, why should anything have been wrong? She had been fine all day and most of that evening. It wasn't until after that phone call. Who the hell had that been? Had that been the reason for it all?

He clicked the keys and the pages flipped back and forth. Suicide. Murder-suicide.

Nathan felt sick to his stomach. The questions floating in his mind were maddening. He refused to even verbalize them, was angry with himself for even thinking them, but no matter how hard he tried they continued to whisper at the corners of his mind. Had Paige wanted him to go? Had she thought about having him come along and...and...

It was the sound of Paige's whimpering that drew him back from the past. Even with the door mostly closed he could hear her. He shut down the computer and returned to the other room. Paige had curled herself into a ball and was shuddering in her sleep. He climbed back into bed with her and she crawled into his arms instantly. Nathan kissed her gently on the head and her whimpering stopped.

"I'm not going to let anyone hurt you," he whispered to her sleeping form. "Not if I can help it. Not ever again."





CHAPTER SEVENTY-FIVE



Paige woke with a slip of a smile on her face. She curled against Nathan. He still had his arms wrapped around her. She looked up at him. He was sleeping, a scowl on his face. He obviously wasn't having pleasant dreams. Her smile faltered and was replaced with a frown. She wondered what this was doing to him, what she was doing to him. What must be going on in his mind? He was curled up in bed, comforting a woman who was the mirror image of his dead wife. That certainly couldn't be easy. He had definitely accepted the fact that she wasn't his Paige, but did that make things easier or harder?

She bit her lip as she thought. What were her feelings here? She knew she was feeling something for him. However, the way things were, she wasn't entirely sure she could trust herself. Her entire world was apparently a lie. Could her feelings be as well? And even if they weren't, was it possible they had any future together? Could he ever look at her and see only her and not his dead wife?

She almost laughed out loud at the absurdity of it all as the events of the previous night came rushing back. The news clippings she had seen last night spun around in her head. How could she have blocked them out? How the heck could she even be thinking about the prospect of a relationship right now?

"Because you need something positive to think about," she muttered to herself.

She felt Nathan stir at the sound of her voice and she silently cursed herself. She wanted to stay the way they were a little longer. She wasn't sure she was ready to face the coming day. She wasn't sure she would ever be ready. Wrapped in his arms, she could at least pretend to be safe and happy.

When she looked at Nathan again, she saw he was looking back at her. He gave her a little smile and she returned it as best she could, squeezing him tightly.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you."

"That's okay," Nathan said. "I've been up and down all night."

Neither of them made a move to get up. They both realized that this could potentially be their last moment of relative peace for a while. Possibly forever. Paige kept her head on his chest and willed time to stop. She sighed when she felt him pull back the covers. She wanted to grab them and pull them back over them and hide away, but she knew she couldn't. If he was willing to face the day then she had no choice but to face it with him.