'Here.'
The handkerchief he passed her was soft and white, his gesture so much at odds with his harshly derisive tone that she frowned at the square of white cotton he was handing her for several seconds before reaching out to take it from him.
Their fingers touched, the oddest sensation flowing through her body from that point of contact. Hot and breathless, she told herself she was simply suffering the effects of the pressurised cabin. As she dried her damp face she became aware that the handkerchief smelled faintly of Saul's cologne. Her hand started to shake, her breath trapped in her lungs as he suddenly leaned across her.
For a second their eyes met: hers confused and wary, his coolly grey and remote, and then she realised that he was simply releasing her seatbelt for her. For a moment as he leaned towards her she had actually thought …
Her cheeks scarlet with mortification, she rolled his handkerchief up into a ball and turned away from him. He had guessed that she thought he was going to kiss her? Why on earth had she thought that? Since he had announced that they were to marry he had made no attempt to touch her in any way at all. She knew how he felt about her and yet here she was quivering with nerves and tension simply because she had quite erroneously thought she glimpsed a hot spark of desire in his eyes.
If he knew, no doubt his contempt would crucify her. By rights she ought to loathe the very thought of him touching her when she knew how little he wanted her, but when were emotions ever governed by logic? Right now there was nothing she wanted more than for him to open his arms to her and to settle her aching head against his shoulder. She ached for the security of his arms round her, protecting her from all her fears and dreads of this new life he was taking her to.
If he really had been taking her home as his new bride she would have been deluging him with questions now, demanding to know as much as he could tell her about the life they would live together. As it was …
'I realise you haven't the slightest interest in either me or my family.' The harshly cynical voice drew her attention, her eyes fastening on his as Saul continued curtly, 'But I suggest you find a way of manufacturing some before we arrive in Florida, otherwise my mother is going to be extremely suspicious.'
'You could always tell her the truth.'
She saw him frown. 'She has enough to worry about with my stepfather's health, without me giving her more problems. As far as my parents are concerned, Lucy, our marriage is a perfectly normal one, entered into for all the normal reasons, and I intend that they shall go on thinking that.'
Briefly Lucy envied his mother. He must love her an awful lot to want to protect her from the reality of their marriage. If she had a son, would he love her with the same intensity?
'Surely they'll be surprised that we … that we got married so quickly and … '
'Not really; they know … They know you're carrying my child,' he told her calmly, and yet as he looked away from her Lucy felt sure that he had been about to say something else. Knowing that there was little point in questioning him about it she said instead, 'I suppose they were very shocked.'
'Surprised rather than shocked.'
He gave her a mocking smile as he felt her turn slightly towards him in query.
'My mother is a woman of the world, Lucy, and I'm not a boy any more. Although she's hardly likely to say so, I feel sure that she will be rather surprised that I was careless enough to allow such a situation to arise.'
One eyebrow rose as he looked at her, watching the tide of colour burn up under her skin.
'Never mind,' he taunted softly. 'If she sees you blushing like that, no doubt she'll simply assume I got carried away on a fatal tide of passion.'
Of course Saul must have been involved with other women and of course his mother would know that he did not live like a monk, but would she ever believe that Saul, so controlled, could have behaved in such a reckless way?
All brides must dread meeting an unknown mother-in-law, Lucy reflected, but in her case her anxiety was intensified by the fact that Saul's mother was also her aunt, and in addition there was a history of family enmity between her father and his sister. In the circumstances she could hardly expect Saul's mother to welcome her with open arms.
She shivered.
'Are you feeling all right?'
Saul sounded curt, probably dreading the embarrassment of calling a stewardess over to her, Lucy thought, remembering how angry her father used to get with her when she was a child if she did anything to call attention to herself.
'I'm fine.'
It was the truth. Physically at least she felt reasonably well. The vitamin supplements she was taking were already helping to alleviate the draining exhaustion of her early pregnancy and every day she regained a little more of her own strength.
The flight was a long one and after lunch Lucy gave in to her desire to sleep, turning her head away from Saul. Which made it all the more embarrassing that she should wake up with her head pillowed against his shoulder, his arm curled around her.
To anyone who didn't know the real situation they must look like a devoted couple, she thought as she sat up and Saul immediately removed his arm.
'Sorry about that.'
Her voice sounded stiff with defensiveness as she pulled away.
'Why? Because I'm not Summers?'
Saul's voice was unwarrantedly harsh. Why did he keep having to bring Neville into their conversations? Was he doing it to hurt her? Deliberately mentioning the name of the man he thought she loved to cause her pain? It hurt to know that he thought her capable of making love with him for calculating motives, in order to help Neville. Surely he must have known when he held her in his arms that her emotions were real and not assumed? But why should he care either way? He had made it plain that he had simply been using her as he thought she had been using him.
After that she couldn't sleep again, growing increasingly tense and nervous as the end of their journey drew nearer.
How would she fit in with Saul's family? How much would they be expected to see of them? Where did Saul live? Did he have his own house, or …
Almost as though he followed her train of thought he said abruptly, 'Tonight we'll be staying with my parents. They think this is a love-match, Lucy, and I'd be obliged if you don't do anything to alter that impression. I owe my stepfather a good deal,' he added harshly, 'and if you do anything, anything at all to prejudice his health … '
What sort of a woman did he think she was? She felt almost sick with despair.
'You don't have to extract promises from me, or make threats, Saul,' she told him tightly. 'I'm as anxious for your family to believe we're happily married as you are.'
She saw his expression and told him tonelessly, 'Our child will be growing up among them. I don't want him to be considered an outcast, to hear gossip about his parents, or …
'Him?' Saul queried mockingly, his expression lightening briefly. 'Are you so convinced we will have a son, then?'
Was she? She examined the question and found she didn't really mind if she had a boy or a girl.
'"He" just came automatically,' she told him. The brief softening in his mood encouraged her to ask tentatively, 'Where will we live Saul? Do you … '
'At the moment I have an apartment-it's in the centre of town and convenient for my work, but I shall sell it and find something more suited to family life. I spent several years cooped up in an apartment as a child, and it's not what I want for any son or daughter of my own.' He frowned as he said, 'My mother will probably ask us to stay but in the circumstances I think we'd be better using the apartment until we can find the right house. It would be too much of a strain if we had to keep up the pretence of our marriage on a day-to-day basis.'
'Yes.' Oddly enough it made her feel closer to him to hear him say that he, too, was aware of that strain; it made him seem more human, more like the Saul she had seen so briefly in those halcyon days before their quarrel.
'I warn you, you'll be subjected to a good deal of cross questioning by my stepsisters; they both live locally with their families and … '
'And quite naturally they're going to be curious about the woman who's married their little brother?' Lucy supplied.
The voice of the captain announced that they were nearing the end of their journey and further personal conversation became impossible in the hurly-burly and bustle of preparations for quitting the plane.
* * *
It was not so much the heat as the humidity that struck Lucy first, hitting her like a wall of hot, moist air the moment they left the terminal building. Saul had refused to allow her to help him with their luggage, and now she felt glad. The effect of the humidity was such that it drained her completely of energy.