Second(5)

Dean seems to consider something, then nods and says, “Listen, there’s something—”

“There you are,” Ben says, walking towards the two of us. I move my gaze from Dean to him, taking in his shaggy blond hair and baby-blue eyes. “Sorry I’m late, I had to stay back for detention.” He looks to Dean and lifts his chin. “What you doing here, cuz?”

Cuz?

Dean pushes off the wall. “Just didn’t want Sabina to stand here alone.” He slaps Ben on his shoulder as he passes, then heads to the car park without so much as a backwards glance.

“He’s your cousin?” I ask, eyes going wide. Great, I was just checking out my boyfriend’s family member.

Ben wraps an arm around my waist and pulls me into his body. “Yeah, you didn’t know that? You look beautiful today, by the way.” He touches my high ponytail of thick dark hair. “I like your hair up.”

“Thank you,” I say, glancing up at him. “And no, I didn’t know that.”

“Let’s go,” he says, nodding towards his car. Hand in hand we walk to it.

Ben opens his car door for me, and I throw in my heavy bag of books first, then slide inside. As we’re driving away, I see Dean standing by his car, eyes on his phone.

I watch him until it would become obvious if I continued, then turn to look at Ben, who reaches out and puts his hand on my thigh. I smile at the familiarity of it, then glance out of the window.

Everything in my life is as it should be.



*****

I shake my head, as if getting rid of that thought, and walk into my bedroom. I brush my hair again and tie it up, then slide my feet into a pair of black leather ankle boots. I don’t bother with make-up. I don’t think anything can save the dark circles under my eyes. Luckily I’ve been blessed with decent skin, so I don’t look so bad without foundation, but I still look a little pale and ghostlike. Shrugging, I grab my handbag and return to Dean. “Ready when you are.”

He nods and stands, putting his empty beer bottle in the recycling bin before heading to the door.

“Why are you drinking beer at 11:00 a.m.?” I ask, tilting my head to the side and studying him. He must have had the same idea as me. Getting drunk doesn’t solve any of life’s problems, but it sure as hell can solve today’s problems.

“It’s all you had to drink besides milk,” he says, smirking. “Which was off.”

“Oh,” I mutter as he opens the door for me. I haven’t exactly thought about being a great host when all I wanted to do was be alone for the unforeseeable future. My parents dropped by once before they had to fly back home, and I don’t think I was great company. In fact, I should probably call them and apologise for being an arsehole. We’re not that close, but they still came to see if I was doing okay, but all I wanted was to be alone. Even under the circumstances, they are my parents and I shouldn’t have been so rude to them. They probably shouldn’t have left so soon too, but that’s a whole different story.

“Are you okay to drive or do you want me to?” I ask him.

He closes the door behind him, and I pull out my key to double lock it.

“I’m fine to drive,” he says, patiently waiting. “We’ll take my car.”

I turn around and see just what his car is. My jaw drops open. “Oh my God. It’s beautiful,” I whisper, rushing over to it and running my hand along the hood. The brand new black Range Rover is amazing. I suddenly feel like driving. “Can I drive?”

“No,” he says, opening the passenger door for me.

“Why not?” I ask, deflating. “I thought you’re here to try and make me happy. This will make me temporarily very happy.”

He ignores me and gets into the driver seat. I close my door and put my seat belt on, eying the interior. When he starts the engine, “Never be like you” by Flume fills the car, bringing me back to the reality of my life. I rub my chest, wondering why things have to be this way. I know bad things happen to good people. I know not everyone gets what they want in life. What I don’t know is how I’m meant to deal with losing someone so close to me. So many things I took for granted, so many times I acted a certain way and now wish I hadn’t. There were times when I thought I wasn’t even happy, but now? I wish for those times once more. Dean turns down the volume and I can feel his gaze on me. “You okay?”

“Yeah.” I nod, forcing a smile. “I can’t hide forever, right? I need to face what my life is now.”

I need to conquer it.

“You’ll get there,” he says, sounding confident. “You’ve always been strong, Sabina.”