“Are you okay?” he asks me, resting his hand on my nape.
“Yeah,” I say, forcing a smile. I know if I don’t say bye to him properly I will regret it. There’s no point lashing out at Dean. He hid something from me, and I’ve told him it hurt me. I’m going to leave it at that. I don’t want him to leave with us angry. You never know when the last time you’ll see someone is, and I will never leave anyone I care about on bad terms. No, I want them to know just how much they mean to me every time.
“Can I make you something to eat before we leave?” I ask him. We had a light breakfast, but I’m a little hungry again already.
“I’m fine, babe,” he says, cupping my cheek. “Are you hungry? We can get something on the way, if you want.”
“I’m good,” I tell him. I’ll grab something after I drop him at the airport. If I haven’t lost my appetite by then.
I hate this.
I hate that we went from being so easy around each other to this. I don’t know what to say, or how to act. I’m still upset that he lied to me and I can’t pretend that I’m not, but he’s flying home today. I don’t want to fight anymore. But things can’t be exactly how they were before the knock on my front door.
“Come here,” he says, pulling me to stand up and pressing me against his hard chest. “I fucking hate this, Sabina. Why don’t you come with me? I’ll buy you a ticket right now. Can you take off another week or two?”
He waits for the last minute to ask me this? “I can’t. My manager is my friend but even she’s not just going to give me another week off.”
I mean, I could ask and there’s a small chance it will be fine, but do I really want to go with him right now? I haven’t packed or anything. It’s too late. I don’t know. “Maybe I can come to you in a couple of weeks?”
He breathes a sigh of relief, like he didn’t know if he’d be seeing me again or something.
“Promise me,” he says, lifting my chin up.
“I’ll promise that I’ll try to get work off,” I say, nodding. “And if I can then yeah, I’ll come to you. It’s long overdue, apparently.”
“Yes, it is,” he says, kissing me once. “I hope you can forgive me for not telling you. I don’t want you to start ignoring me as soon as I leave, Sabina. Because I’ll be on the next flight home, fucking appearances or not.”
“I won’t ignore you,” I tell him, and I won’t. If he did that to me, I know how much I’d hate it. Relationships aren’t easy, but long distance? You need to have communication or there is no point.
“Good girl,” he says, and this time the kiss we share is long, deep, and slow.
And sad.
It’s going to suck not having him here with me, but I know the time alone to clear my head will do me good. Also, if work cooperates, hopefully I’ll be visiting him at his house soon for the first time. We can talk more about everything then, or on the phone in the meantime.
“I’m going to miss you, even though you’re a jerk,” I say.
“You really think I’m a jerk?”
“No,” I grumble. But he did what he did, so he’s… something.
A man who made a mistake?
Maybe that.
“Good,” he says, kissing the top of my head. “Fuck, I don’t want to leave you, especially not now. If I didn’t have this appearance, I’d stay here. If you can’t come to me, I’ll come back here in a week or so, whenever I’m free, okay?”
Fuck, he’s sweet. And so damn cute.
“Okay,” I say, feeling more upbeat. Either way, we’ll be seeing each other soon. This isn’t like last time; we’re not going to let much time pass before we’re back together. This isn’t goodbye, just I’ll see you soon.
We end up making out, and when it turns hot and heavy, I wonder why the hell we wasted so much time this morning being angry and sad and all of those other annoying emotions when we could have been doing this.
“Do we have time?” I ask him as he starts to lift my dress up.
“I don’t give a fuck,” he says, pushing me back on the bed, pulling down my panties and going down on me.
“Oh my God,” I groan, threading my fingers through his hair and lifting my hips up into his face.
I’m going to miss his mouth.
His lips.
Him.
“Dean, I want you inside me,” I say breathily, needing to feel him before he goes. He undoes his jeans, pulls them down, and takes his perfect cock out, hard and ready like it always is, and slides inside of me in one smooth thrust. Eyes staying connected with mine, he thrusts in and out of me, fast and deep, an almost desperate air about it. He’s going to be in a different country. It fucking sucks. Lips on mine, hips dipping, this time we climax together.