I roll my eyes at her. “I’m not back in the game. I’m exploring something with someone I’ve known for a long time.”
This is anything but a game.
It’s kind of scary, putting my heart on the line like this, and possibly even losing one of the most important people in my life if it goes sour. I know he says it won’t, but he doesn’t know that. No one thinks their relationship will turn bad, but the sad truth is that most do. Just look at the divorce rate. I don’t think anyone goes into a relationship thinking that it won’t work out. Everyone starts out optimistic.
What a depressing thought that is.
“If it’s dating, you’re in the game,” she says, smirking. “Now don’t do your overthinking bullshit and you’ll do fine. By the way, Dean Amore is domesticated? Cooking? Is there anything he isn’t good at?”
She wiggles her eyebrows.
I shake my head no.
We both burst out laughing.
I can just imagine what Dean is thinking, hearing us laughing our arses off, but he should know by now what we’re like when we’re together. We’re loud, always making private jokes, and usually take things too far.
“How did your date go the other night?” I ask, turning the focus to her. “Seeing him again, or not?”
She makes a face. “I’m not sure. The date went okay, but there wasn’t really that in-your-face chemistry, you know?”
“Is this the guy that Persephone set you up with?” I ask.
Sephie knows some really hot guys. Hell, she even has two hot brothers, but they’re both taken.
She nods. “Yeah and he’s good-looking and a gentleman and everything. I just don’t know.”
“Maybe give him another chance,” I suggest. “Did you kiss him? I think you can tell if there’s chemistry or not by the kiss.”
“I didn’t kiss him,” she says, smirking. “I’m taking it slow, Bina.”
“But now you don’t know and you’re reconsidering another date,” I say, nudging her playfully. “I say go for the second date. And kiss the crap out of him. Then report back to me on compatibility.”
She laughs and says, “Fine, I guess we’ll see how it goes then.”
“If not, there are plenty of other men out there,” I say, smiling to myself.
“Are you suddenly a romantic?”
“No,” I deny.
“Then why are you still smiling?” she asks, arching her brow. “You’re so cute, Bina.”
“I’m not smiling,” I lie, touching my cheeks with my palms. “Okay, maybe I am. I just feel so… ughhh!”
I can’t even explain it. Just everything.
“Happy?” Tara supplies, smiling warmly. “It’s so good to finally see you happy.”
Finally?
“You don’t think I was happy before?” I ask her in a soft voice. Was I happy before? I thought I was.
“I do,” she says, expression softening before. “But I don’t know, this is different.”
She’s right, it is different. I don’t know, I can’t explain it either.
“It feels good,” I say, ducking my head, then glancing at her.
We share a look.
She knows me so well. She knows what I’m thinking even before I do, and the look in her eyes tells me that she understands exactly how I’m feeling.
Then she smiles, and says, “I guess you’re not going to be my wingwoman anytime soon then?”
“I can still be your wingwoman,” I say defensively, brow furrowing. “I just won’t be chasing the D with you.”
We both start laughing again.
*****
“How did you meet Tara?” Dean asks me while we’re in bed. Tara left about an hour ago, after we ate. Good food and company, can’t ask for much more.
“We met in my first year of uni,” I explain, closing my eyes as he runs his fingers through my hair. “I was studying in the library, and she came in, drenched from the rain. We started talking, and just got on really well.”
“What made you start talking?” he asks.
“I pointed at her and said, ‘Did you just get your Prada bag wet?’ And then she nodded sadly, so I got some tissues out of my bag and helped her dry it.”
Dean chuckles and mutters, “Yeah, I can see that happening.”
“She’s my female soulmate,” I add, yawning. I look at him and say, “I’m going to miss you when you go.”
“I’m going to miss you too,” he murmurs, lifting my chin with his finger. He lowers his face and kisses me, his lips already knowing mine so well. When he leaves, it’s going to suck. But it’s too soon for anything else; it would be stupid of me to make a rash decision and move to LA or something. We only just admitted our feelings for each other, and I don’t even know what he wants to do when he leaves. Long distance or nothing? Or even worse, are we just not going to talk about it, and then I’ll be overthinking and analysing every single thing he says.