There’s nothing I wouldn’t give to wake up and realize it has all been a dream, the whole fucking mess that has taken over my life. All I want is to have a simple life where my worst worry is if I’m going to manage to pay the bills this month.
I want Madison to be alive and I want Jax to be innocent and in love with me. But dreams are all hype and real life is a bitch with claws.
Crossing the street to the alley where I park my car, I’m almost run over by a yellow cab that screeches to a stop. I stare through the windshield, but the sun glare hides whoever is inside the taxi.
The back door opens. A tall man in sunglasses rises to his feet. “Get in,” Jaxson says. “Don’t fight me on this. There’s not a moment to spare.”
—five—
The whole world can go screw themselves
His hair sits funny on his head, one side lower than the other, clear evidence of a sleepless, sweaty night. His nose is puffed up with a small bruise on the bridge like it’s been punched, yet he’s never been sexier. There is sincerity and determination on his face like I’ve never seen before.
The memories of the Malibu mansion are hard to fight. My brain turns to goo thinking of Jax with his hands all over my body, his hot tongue devouring me like a melting Popsicle and the primal sounds he made me make.
My impulses are all over the place. I’m totally aware of all the mistakes I could make if I’m not strong. Jax goes around the mansion, securing doors and windows, making sure all blinds and drapes are drawn, shutting the light out.
“Are you preparing the house for a vampire?” I say to lighten the creepy mood his meticulous paranoia causes.
“Better safe than sorry,” he says.
That’s a weird thing to say. “Except that I am sorry,” I say, trying to redirect his intense energy. “I should have visited you in jail.”
“You couldn’t visit me there,” he says. “The press would have eaten you alive and this would all be so much worse.”
“What’s going on, Jax? What is all this? There’s no press outside,” I say as soon as he settles down on the couch next to me. I instinctively recoil a bit to avoid our bodies making contact.
He glares at me, his eyes hazy and panicked to the hundredth power. “I want you with me,” he says. “Safe and in my arms. That’s what this is.”
“Well, here I am,” I say, mockingly. “The answer to your dreams.”
He fidgets for a while, eyes hooked on mine. Half of me resists touching him, the other half begs for his warm embrace.
“Brad said you’re having a really hard time,” he says, licking his gorgeous lips to soften the tension of the moment.
“Ah, your little snitch did his job,” I say, not entirely sure why I feel like provoking him.
“It’s not like that, Ella,” he says but doesn’t elaborate. He stares at me and sighs before reaching out to take my hand.
I yank my body off the couch as if hit by lightning. I stand at a safe distance so I can talk without being distracted by his fingers. “So this is damage control? Is that why you needed to see me?”
“Ella,” Jax says. “I had to find you because my lungs felt like they were suffocating without you.”
“Right. Because I’m so special.” My bitterness must be shining through. I don’t care. He’d better get to the point fast. I’m only giving him this one chance to come clean.
“Yes, because you’re special to me. I know I owe you an explanation.”
I eye him even more suspiciously now. “You owed me an explanation a long time ago, Jax.”
“We’re here now. I’ll be an open book. Give me another chance.”
“Start with Madison,” I say. “Did you have anything to do with her death?”
His face stiffens. “Ella, you must think I’m a fucking viper. I had nothing to do with Madison. I get you had to ask that, but I’m not going to lie, it still hurts that you did.”
“Don’t start with who hurt who, Jax,” I say, tears welling. “You’d lose that battle by a million fucking miles.”
“Ella, I’m sorry.” He moves to me.
I hold my hand up to stop him. “We’re talking now,” I say. “That’s it.”
He stops and hangs his head like a hurt puppy. “I understand.”
“I don’t think you did it,” I tell him, “but you’re right. I sure as hell have the right to ask. Now tell me why an innocent man was taken into custody?”
“A bullshit witness,” he says. “Who’s telling them they saw me enter Madison’s building around the time of her murder.” He pauses, taking in a deep breath, frustrated. “They also say my DNA was found on her body.”