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Say You're Sorry(94)

By:Michael Robotham


Mr. Martinez adjusts a figure that has fallen over on a platform—a stationmaster wearing a uniform and holding a flag.

“Only three tracks are running today,” he explains. “There are normally five. Would you like a tour?”

“Please.”

He takes me to the control panel and flicks several switches, setting more engines in motion. Boom gates open and close. Trains pause at level crossings. Whistles sound. Bells peal. The movement and sound seem to bring the models to life and I can almost imagine the little manikins moving.

“How long has this taken you?”

“A couple of years.”

“Is it finished?”

“I keep changing my mind and rebuilding things.”

“A work in progress?”

“A Sisyphean task.”

Grievous has picked up a dining carriage. “Hey, there are little people in here. You can see the food on their plates.”

“Please don’t touch,” says Mr. Martinez. “Some of the pieces are very delicate.”

The detective constable sets down the carriage, wiping a smudge of oil from his fingertips.

On the wall of the garage I notice a photograph of Emily. The image has been folded in the frame, concealing the other person in the shot.

“I was hoping to speak to Emily.”

“She’s at work today. She has a part-time job in Abingdon.”

“Can I ask you a question? Why did Emily want to run away?”

Mr. Martinez doesn’t react. He flicks more switches. Another train is set in motion. “It was during the divorce. They were difficult days.”

“Emily’s mother lives in London.”

“Yes.”

“You don’t share custody?”

Mr. Martinez pauses, squeezing his temple between this thumb and forefinger. “My wife attempted suicide a few years ago. It had been on the cards. Amanda had problems with alcohol and drug dependency, painkillers in the main. She stopped acting like a responsible adult, which is why I sued for custody.”

“She fought the case?”

“Yes, but common sense prevailed.”

“When did she attempt suicide, before or afterwards?”

His smile is long forgotten. “I don’t feel comfortable with a question like that.”

“I’m sorry. It came out the wrong way.”

“I doubt that, Professor. You don’t strike me as someone who speaks without thinking.”

“You have a slight American accent,” I say, changing the subject.

“I worked there for seven years. Amanda never really settled and her drinking got worse. I came home one day and she and Emily had packed up and come back to England.”

“You followed them.”

“Not immediately. My work was too important.”

“That must have been hard, being away from Emily.”

“I tried to get back and see her when I could. Amanda wouldn’t let Emily fly on her own to the States. In the end I sacrificed everything to come back—my research project, my funding.”

The trains are still circling, their lights flashing and whistles sounding.

“I did that for Emily because I could see what was happening. Amanda’s drinking had got worse. She went to AA for a while, but kept falling off the wagon. She had always been flighty and highly strung, but she’d become positively destructive. Popping pills. Blacking out. Twice Emily couldn’t wake her up and had to call an ambulance. That’s why I fought for Emily and I didn’t give up until I’d won her back.”

“You make her sound like a prize.”

He gives me the flattest of looks. “All children are gifts.”

“Your daughter wanted to run away.”

“We took a while to get to know each other. There were bumps along the way.”

“Bumps?”

“Amanda suffered a relapse and was committed to a psych ward. Emily blamed me.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know. You should ask her. Amanda going to hospital was probably why Emily stayed. She visited her mum every day and in the meantime we got to know each other. Things became easier… she understood the rules.”

“Rules?”

“The normal stuff—no drinking, no smoking, no drugs, no junk food, no staying out late… Her weight was all over the place and her school grades were terrible. All that changed when I took charge.”

“She was going through puberty.”

“Exactly. Teenagers shouldn’t be treated like adults. They don’t have the emotional and intellectual skills. That’s half the problem in this country—lack of supervision, children being allowed to roam the streets. Look at the London riots. Young kids were breaking windows, trashing cars and stealing flat-screen TVs just because they were bored and they had no role models at home.”