“Do you think we’re going to struggle like we did with Todd?”
“I hope not.” Presley returns to playing with my hair. “Do you remember when I was sitting around the house after he died?”
She was a ghost. Presley would answer if she was asked a question, but she’d completely lost herself. It was as if she’d died along side of him. “Yes.”
“Don’t let the pain over run you. I can only say this to you because you’re my sister, my best friend, and I love you. I’ve been right where you are. I’ve felt the pain so deep I wanted to let it consume me. I did let it.” Her eyes hold mine. “You made it stop. You forced me to dig deep and breathe again. Don’t get lost, Ang. Don’t let it eat y’all alive. You lived, don’t let her death be in vain.”
Presley stands, brushes the grass off her legs, and then helps me up as well. I know what she’s telling me is coming from a place of love, but I’ve never felt like this. “How? How do I move on from this?”
Losing Todd was completely different. He was an adult, and it was his choice. This wasn’t. This was a terrible accident that altered the future I thought I would have.
“By living. By loving someone. By forgiving yourself, Wyatt, and anyone else you blame. For understanding that the time you did have was precious. Look at what you’ve learned. Look at what you’ve found.” Her eyes move toward the guys.
She doesn’t get it. Wyatt may have been falling in love with me, but he truly loved the baby. She’s gone now. I have no idea what any of this means for us, and honestly, I don’t have the wherewithal to care. I was supposed to be leaving here in a week anyway. Clearly, I can’t drive with a broken wrist and staples in my stomach, so I’ve had to postpone it.
“Now that there’s no baby between us, I don’t know if there even is an us,” I say, feeling a new wave of sadness. “Is this what you felt like when Todd died? Just empty and as if you’d lost everything?”
Presley’s eyes shine with unshed tears. “I did lose everything. I lost my husband, my business, my home, my best friend, and the life I built. I faced every single fear I’d ever had. I was stupid, in pain, and miserable.” She glances at the guys and then back to me. “When I got here, Wyatt was who was there for me. I didn’t know Zach was in Bell Buckle, but Wyatt was on my farm. He kept showing up, making me leave the house, forcing me to find my footing back in a place I didn’t want to be.” She smiles and it’s both warm and sad at the same time. “Then, as if he knew I was ready before even I did, he pushed me into Zach’s arms.”
“He was distant and cold before the accident.” I remind her. “He could’ve realized he wasn’t reciprocating what I was feeling.”
It was what held me back from saying anything to him. He was being closed off and almost angry. He wouldn’t talk or do any of the things I’d come to love about being around Wyatt.
She looks out at the horizon. “Guys are weird. Country boys are a whole new level. Wyatt has never had a real relationship, neither have you.”
“I had Nate.”
She snorts. “You had a guy who was a friend. Someone you didn’t even glance at when you left for here. You didn’t love him. It’s not even close to this relationship.”
“The only reason I came here was because I was pregnant. That’s it, Pres. I have my business back in Philly that I have to think about. Without having the baby anymore . . .” My chest aches. “I don’t know if he even wants to try.”
Presley shakes her head. “You accuse me of being dense.”
“We’ll figure it out.” My eyes drift to him. “Maybe not today or this week, but when we can think clearly . . . maybe then we’ll see where we stand.”
“Hi, sugar.” Mrs. Kannan says as I let her in.
“I was wondering when you were coming,” I push the screen door open for her. “I guess you drew the short straw for today’s visit?” I give a mangled smile.
“No way! I wanted to see you, darlin’. I’ve missed you. Plus, I made a casserole and thought you were the perfect person for it.”
I chuckle. “Oh boy.”
We walk into the kitchen where there are about ten casseroles and a half dozen pies lined on the counter. That doesn’t count the ones filling the fridge.
“It seems I’m behind the town,” she muses. “Well, mine is better.”
“I’m sure it’s perfect.”
Mrs. Kannan makes herself comfortable at the table. I grab two plates, forks, and the pie that I was eying. I’m intending to eat all of my emotions today. Luckily, I’m in no shortage of baked goods or feelings.