“I like that name!” I say.
“Because we all live in Bell Buckle.” He laughs at his own joke.
“Well, cross that one off,” Wyatt huffs. “Not that it matters if Belle is in the name.”
I glance over at Presley, who gives me a look. It seems I’m not the only one picking up on his mood. “What does that mean?” I ask.
“Nothing.” Wyatt looks over and shakes his head. “It means nothing, I’m sorry.”
“Okay.” I lean in close, drop my voice to a whisper, and place my hand over his. “I feel like something is bothering you.”
“What about Gertrude?” Cayden offers.
“No.” I shake my head. My grandma’s name is Gertrude, and while I love her dearly, it’s not a name I’m giving my daughter.
The boys continue with some of the most horrible names possible. I try to picture what she’ll look like. Hopefully she has blonde hair, like me. We all know blondes have more fun, and get away with more. I hope she has Wyatt’s light brown eyes and his nose. He has a great nose. No matter what, I’m sure she’ll be beautiful. I have faith in that.
“What about Faith?” I say as it hits me.
“Faith?” Wyatt repeats. “You like that name?”
I smile and nod. “Faith Hennington.”
He puts his fork down and leans back. “I like it.” Then he grabs my hand and squeezes. “I like it a lot.”
I start to wonder if I’m imagining all of this. His hot and cold mood swings are giving me whiplash, but right now he seems like he’s okay. Maybe it’s something at work? Maybe he’s nervous about the baby? Or is it because he thinks I’m still planning to leave? I still haven’t talked to him about it because I want to talk to Erin first. It could take a good amount of time for me to get things in order, and I need to know my life is set before I start making any promises. I doubt he would be this upset about that, though. I’ve been pretty clear with my actions that he’s won me over.
Hell, maybe it’s just his man-period.
“Well.” I shrug. “We can put it on the short list.”
We finish dinner and all sit out on the porch, listening to the rain. Zach and Wyatt argue about some football game and then move on to the problem Zach is having with some buyer up north. Presley and I sit quietly, drinking wine and apple juice respectively.
“I keep feeling these weird bubbles in my stomach,” I tell Presley when it tingles for the third time in a few minutes.
She smiles and leans forward. “That’s the baby moving, Ang.”
“What?” I gasp. “I mean, wouldn’t it be like a kick or something?”
She giggles. “Not at first. Not until you’re further along, but that tingling, moving feeling that’s almost like gas?” I nod, letting her know I’m following. “It’s the baby.”
“Holy crap!” I rest my hand on my stomach with a grin. “She’s become so real to me.” I whisper and then worry at my bottom lip. “Pres, what do you think is going on with Wyatt?” My eyes move toward him. “He’s being weird. It’s making me question things.”
I get hung up on this a lot in my mind. With never really loving someone, do I even know what love feels like? I love people, obviously, but loving a man is totally different. It’s things that I never experienced before. He’s the first thought I have in the morning. I wonder if he brought his lunch or if he’s thinking of me, which then usually leads to me stopping by and seeing him on my way to the bakery.
He does the sweetest little things too. The other day he ordered a Keurig and every different flavor of Starbucks cups he could find. I’m waiting for him to hire a barista at this point. Then, he kissed my nose and told me I didn’t need a Starbucks, I had it here.
And then he went back to being moody.
“I noticed . . .” she trails off.
“Maybe he doesn’t feel the same way about me.”
She shakes her head. “No. I know that boy, and I see it in his eyes.”
I thought I did, too. “Well, the way he’s been this last couple of weeks is not love. He’s barely able to tolerate being around me.”
“Love can be so many things.” She shakes her head. “It can be beautiful, exciting, full of so much hope, even freeing, but it’s also scary as fuck. You give yourself to a person in a lot of ways. But you need to talk to him.”
Until the ultrasound, I thought we were there. Now, it feels like we’re pulling away more than we’re coming together.
“I’m not the one with my head up my ass.”