Billionaire Bachelors Club 3 : Savor(50)

 

 

"Right. And who knows if any more pictures will show up? I will die if that happens, I swear. I can't live like this," I say, my voice soft yet steely while inside my nerves are in absolute chaos. "I can't do it, Matt."

"What are you talking about?" he asks, and I close my eyes, afraid to look at him, scared to see the sadness in his gaze.

"Having to deal with this sort of thing will wreck my self-esteem, and it's already pretty wrecked." I crack open my eyes to find him staring at me, shock written all over his handsome face. "I'll never be able to escape the shadow of being the home wrecker, the easy girl. The dumb slut who sleeps with her boss because she thinks that's what she's supposed to do."

"But that's not what we have, Bryn. Can't you see it? This has nothing to do with me being your boss and you being my assistant. What we have, what we shared last night, is about us being a man and a woman who are attracted to each other." He pauses, staring at me. "Right?"

I can only look at him, not sure what to say, how to defend my feelings. They are what they are, and I have no explanation for them. They're just there. And they're not about to go away anytime soon. It's not that easy.

But I don't tell him any of that. He wouldn't understand. He's wealthy and established and confident in going after what he wants, be it a new career, a new woman-a new whatever.

Me, on the other hand, I lack confidence. I'm young and broke and striving to make myself better, but every time I think I've pushed myself into a better place, I f**k it up somehow and end up taking about forty steps backward.

Until I'm right back where I started.

"I don't know," I admit softly. "I'm not sure if this can work out."

"Bryn." His voice breaks on my name and the sound breaks my heart. "Don't do this. Don't say that."

"I was going to give my notice when we returned home," I blurt out, wanting him to know the truth. "I was going to give you two weeks. Then I was going to pack up all my stuff in boxes, shove it into the back of my Saturn, and drive home to Cactus. My grandma said I can stay with her until I get back on my feet and find a job."

Now he looks good and pissed. "You were going to give your notice so you can go back to Cactus? Have you lost your mind?"

I shrug, angry that he would be so insulting. "I have nothing else holding me here." It's a lie. He could hold me here, but I know it wouldn't work out. And it wouldn't be what's best for me. I'd just end up making another mistake and making us both look bad. 

He's better off without me. And I don't know if this is true, but I'm probably better off without him too.

"You have nothing else." His voice is monotone, the look in his eyes, blank. "So what happened last night doesn't matter."

"Not when it'll end up hurting us, which it will undoubtedly do." I approach him but he takes a step back, like he doesn't want to be near me. "I'm not sure if we're good for each other," I admit.

He stares at me, his mouth set in a grim line. "So you still want to give your notice?"

Slowly, I nod, ignoring the wave of panic that threatens to consume me at my silent confirmation.

"Then I accept your notice. You don't even need to give me two weeks. We're done." His voice, his expression, is final, and I swear I want to burst into great, heaving sobs.

But I don't. I remain quiet, composed. How, I'm not sure.

"I think you should try and call and change your flight so you can head home tonight," he suggests, his voice clipped. "I'll reimburse you for the change fee which I'm sure will be huge."

"Fine. I'll leave tonight." I lift my chin, refusing to let him see me down. This was what I wanted after all.

Wasn't it?

Chapter Thirteen

Matt

Two weeks later

"YOU ANSWERED." I rub my jaw, the rasp of stubble prickling across my palm. I haven't shaved in days, and I've slept like shit.

"You keep calling my damn phone so yeah, I answered," Dad says, sounding downright hostile. "Whatcha want, son?"

I want Bryn. I miss her. I hate what happened between us, how easily our tentative relationship was destroyed. Just by a slightly scandalous photo and a few choice words on a bunch of crappy gossip websites.

Hell, it was a very scandalous photo, leaving Bryn feeling beyond embarrassed. Vulnerable. I'm used to those gossipy sites saying a bunch of lies and spreading rumors. Bryn isn't.

I'd been angry when I left New York. Now I'm just . . . miserable. She left. I'm not exactly sure to where, but I know she couldn't handle being near me another minute longer. Not that I handled our last conversation in New York particularly well. The moment we discovered the article and photo, it all went to hell.