Then we're both laughing, leaning against the building as if we need it to hold us upright.
"So I'm guessing now he's ignoring you?" Ivy asks once she's composed herself.
I nod, my laughter dying. "I didn't help matters when I left last night. I didn't say a word to him, just turned and fled like my feet were on fire."
"And then you show up this morning in your beige ensemble and it's back to normal." Ivy sighs. "What a mess."
"I don't know what else to do. His rejection, it . . . hurt," I confess, pressing my lips together to prevent myself from saying anything else. She's my friend but we're not that close. I don't want her to think I'm a total idiot by divulging my past. I've had a lot of crazy stuff happen to me. Beyond the perverts and the crazy bosses and the Hollywood creeps looking for blowjobs, I had boyfriends who weren't that great either. Men look at a pretty face and decent body and think I'm easy.
I change the way I dress and Matt kisses me. Then he pushes me away. And I wanted him to notice me. Deep down inside, I want to be more to Matt than just his assistant.
I'm stupid to be upset because I brought this on myself, but I can't help myself. When it comes to men, I flat out don't think rationally.
I don't want Ivy to think I'm crazy. Even though I sort of am.
"You need to be defiant in the face of rejection, my friend. And he didn't reject you because he doesn't want you. He's probably trying to do the right thing," Ivy points out.
Hmm. She might be right. Matt seems like a pretty stand-up guy from what I've witnessed. I know he'd never set out to purposely toy with me or anything. "It won't work," I tell her, my voice firm. "He's my boss, I'm his employee. I don't know why I let you two convince me something like this could work."
"No, no. Don't you dare give up. I won't let you." Ivy grabs hold of my upper arms and gives me a little shake before releasing her hold. "You're going to wear one of your new outfits tomorrow. No neutrals allowed, okay? Matt needs you on your best behavior and that means you looking your best too. There's a lot at stake tomorrow."
She's so right. Tomorrow is by far the most important day of his newfound career. "Fine, okay. I'll wear my other new dress. Not even a fleck of tan in sight."
"Good." Ivy smiles. "And then tomorrow night, you're going to the party, and you'll be wearing this dress. You'll greet everyone, be an impressive representative of DeLuca Winery even if it kills you. You will make Matt so proud he'll know without a doubt what a valuable employee he has in you. If he happens to also see you as a beautiful woman, then so be it."
Where is she going with this? "And?"
"And if he makes a move, fabulous. But I'm going to warn you." Ivy's expression turns scarily solemn. "If he doesn't make a move, don't be surprised. He tries his hardest to do the right thing, especially because of his father."
"What do you mean, because of his father? What's wrong with him?"
Ivy makes a face. "Vinnie DeLuca has a total slime-ball reputation and embarrasses Matt constantly. They pretty much don't talk anymore."
"Slime-ball reputation? Like how?" Curiosity fills me.
"Womanizer. Liked to start fights, especially when he was playing pro baseball. There were rumors he took steroids and that he gambled and cheated a lot." Ivy shakes her head. "Matt's always tried his hardest to distance himself from his father and his horrible reputation. He's always been a pretty straight arrow."
And here I come along, going from boring and bland to obvious and desperate at warp speed. No wonder he kissed me and then rejected me. He's most definitely trying to do the right thing.
While I've been trying to do the wrong thing.
"I feel like a jerk," I say with a sigh.
"You shouldn't. We encouraged you." Ivy sighs as well. "I feel like a jerk too."
"I'll wear the dress. But I won't try and flaunt myself in front of Matt or anything. It's wrong. He doesn't need that sort of trouble or guilt." I kick at a rock, feeling crappy for doing the right thing.
"You amaze me, you know that? Matt's lucky to have you by his side."
"I really hope he feels that way," I say, my heart twisting in my chest.
Matt
MATT'S LUCKY TO have you by his side.
I really hope he feels that way.
I didn't mean to eavesdrop on Bryn and Ivy's conversation, but I came upon it by accident. And when I realized they were talking about me-and specifically my dad-I had to stick around and hear what they said.
I hated hearing what Ivy said about Dad but there's no denying that she spoke the truth. He is a slime ball and has a terrible reputation, one I try to distance myself from as much as possible.