Saving the Beast(8)

God, was this what Orsai had been trying to tell her? Was Zane trying to protect her by staying away from her?

“You made that choice with Logan,” Diane argued.

Tah and Reno had both mated humans, as well, but she recalled Orsai’s reminder that they were just learning who they were and what it meant to be a shifter.

Clara snorted. “Like he gave me a choice. You know Logan. He pursues what he wants with single-minded purpose. I never stood a chance against him.”

Exactly what Orsai said. How did Zane’s uncle know so much?

“Logan loves you.”

Clara nodded. “We love each other. We’re lucky.”

“If I’m Zane’s mate, he wouldn’t have been able to stay away,” Diane snapped, feeling very unlucky.

“You’re wrong. He would have done his all to stay away, no matter how much it killed him. I’m willing to bet he was trying to keep you safe.”

There it was again. Protection—by staying away. Was that really what had been going on between her and Zane?

“From a life I’m already involved in?” Diane argued. “I was already here, before him. What exactly did he think he was saving me from?”

“How long have you been questioning your roll here?” Diane asked softly.

“I… What do you mean?” That question threw her off-guard. She’d been questioning herself almost from the moment she’d arrived. She’d just hid it so much better in the beginning.

“There’s a connection between mates. We can sense what the other is feeling. Without marking you, Zane might not have known for sure. But he would have picked up on something. Maybe he thought it was him you wanted to leave, him you were afraid of. Maybe you are.”

“I’m uncertain, yes,” Diane admitted. “Scared of making deadly mistakes. But I was never afraid of Zane. Never.”

“Do you want to save him? If you had the ability to, would you use it?”

Diane took a deep breath, understanding what Clara was asking of her. Zane’s image filled her head. So strong, so brave and so compassionate. His golden gaze haunted her.

“This virus… If I’m not his mate, he could kill me,” Diane stated, daring Clara to deny it.

Clara looked at her for a long moment then slowly nodded. “Possibly. With his panther in control, we’d all be in danger around him. The only one guaranteed safety is his mate.”

“And you really believe I’m his mate?”

“I think you already know what I think,” Clara told her. “I’m more interested in what you think.”

“I don’t know,” Diane admitted. “I desire him. He’s a gorgeous man,” she admitted. “But for all I know, what I feel could be nothing more than lust.”

“I’m sure you’ve wanted men before,” Clara countered. “Did it feel like this?”

Diane shook her head, not needing to think about it. No man had consumed her thoughts and dreams the way Zane did. “No.”

Before, she’d always managed to walk away, to lose herself in her work. She was discovering she couldn’t with Zane. But was that due to the overabundance of stress she was under, or could it possibly be caused by something more?

“I want to tell you to go find Zane. I want to demand you try,” Clara said. “But I can’t. I won’t. This is a choice only you can make. But please think about it. Think long and hard, but think quickly. Everyday a little more of the man Zane is gets lost in the animal he’s become. This virus feeds the beast inside and breaks down the bond formed between the two halves. Soon, only the beast will remain, and Zane will be lost to us forever. I really pray that doesn’t happen.”

Diane didn’t want it to happen, either. “If I were to go after him, to try and find him, how would I do that?”

“One of us would have to go with you. It would take a shifter to be able to scent where he is. We’d be able to get you close enough for him to scent you out,” Clara said. “From that point, you’d be on your own.”

“To what? Wait and see if he shows up?”

“He’ll show up,” Clara said. “I wouldn’t have approached you if I didn’t believe that.”

Diane heaved a big sigh. “I feel like my life is unraveling.”

“Maybe it’s just beginning,” Clara countered. “There are so many of us who have felt the pain of losing someone we love. If even a part of you believes you might be Zane’s mate, don’t wait any longer. Don’t take the chance of losing him.”

“I know you’ve lost so many people. Your mom and dad. Your Uncle Thomas is missing.”