“Have you thought about seeing a therapist? I sometimes see a really good woman Dee introduced me to, and she’s free. It still really helps me to talk things over with someone sometimes,” Clare offered.
“I did for a while, but with so much going on, I just stopped going. I was focused more on making sure Shea went to hers. She needed so much help back then, and she’s adjusted pretty well since, but it took over a year of working with the therapist to make even the slightest bit of progress with her, and then another year to get to where we are now. I should go back, though, I think I need it,” Fiona replied.
“I think that’s a great idea. That kind of trauma…” Clare started. “It’s overwhelming if it’s not dealt with.”
Fiona shook her head. “I’m not sorry for what I did.”
“I wouldn’t be, either. Sounds like you didn’t have a choice,” Clare agreed. “I know you did a lot of counseling back then, and I’m sure that helped, but it’s okay if it’s still painful. I still think about things I’ve been through, and sometimes I just need to be sad.”
Fiona studied Clare’s face—the truth in her words, and the concern in her eyes. “You’re right, but the truth is that ever since I met Kieran, those times come less and less.”
Clare smiled. “I felt the same way when I met Rory. Love does funny things to us.”
A knock sounded on the bathroom door, and both women turned toward it.
“That’s him now. He asked me to come in first; you know how men are when they see a ladies’ room sign.” Clare hopped off the counter and walked to the door. “Come talk to him, Fiona.”
Fiona followed her slowly. When she stepped out of the bathroom, she found Kieran with his back to the wall, leaning forward with his hands on his knees. He looked like he was doubled over in pain, but the moment he saw her, relief washed over his face.
“Thanks, Clare.” He exhaled, then stood straight.
“No problem, I’m going back to the locker room. We’re heading to O’Leary’s after this, if you guys want to join to celebrate.”
Fiona remembered that poor Clare had just gotten engaged tonight, and then had to deal with someone else’s drama. Kane was also celebrating, and she’d pretty much dampened everyone’s night. Clare gave her a hug and Fiona squeezed tight, hoping in some way Clare could tell she was sorry for stealing her spotlight.
“Don’t worry about it, hon.” Clare seemed to get it and just gave her a happy smile. Apparently, nothing could bring her down from her high. As Clare left, Fiona and Kieran were on opposite sides of the hall, staring at each other.
“Thanks, um, for defending me. You didn’t have to do that,” Fiona finally admitted, staring down at her feet as her fingers fidgeted together.
“Tell me what happened, Fi.”
She looked up to see his face stern and serious. Gulping heavily, she squared her shoulders. She knew he deserved the truth, and she didn’t blame him for demanding it now. It was just painful to think about, painful to relive.
“You know I have custody of Shea because our mother is dead,” she started, trying to find the courage to finish this conversation.
Kieran nodded.
“Well, she’d always been a loving mom, but maybe not the best when it came to her judgment about men. I knew taking care of Shea was on me. She was always my number-one priority, and our mom wanted it that way. Everything I did was to protect my sister, Kieran.”
“What happened that night, Fiona?” he asked again, taking a few steps toward her.
Clasping her hands together, she exhaled slowly and told him everything. She recounted every fear, every graphic image—everything. For the first time in her life, she bared every part of herself to someone else. When she was done, a loud, lone sob ripped through her, and she buried her face in his shirt.
“Fi, shhh, it’s okay. I’ve got you, flower girl. No one’s ever going to hurt you or Shea again. If I’d only known you then, I would’ve taken care of you.” Kieran tried to calm her, kissing her forehead, then both cheeks, and the tip of her nose as he cupped her face in his hand.
“There would have been nothing you could have done—it all happened so fast. There was so much blood, Kieran. I didn’t even know I’d killed him until the cops arrived.” She sniffed, not holding back as the tears slid down her cheeks in torrents. “How can you stand to look at me knowing what I’ve done?”
“Fi, you saved your sister’s life as well as your own, and you tried to save your mom. Only a strong woman could do what you had to do, and that’s what I see in you. You’re the strongest woman I know, and I just want to be man enough to deserve you.”