Heading out of the bedroom, he glanced over his shoulder. His eyes were guarded, but his smile was warm. “Come to think of it, maybe you better come downstairs to eat. Or we might be sacrificing a few more eggs before noon.”
***
Stepping into the kitchen, Mick had to consciously slow his breathing. He gripped the arch of the entryway to steady himself.
What the hell was happening to him? Sure, his body had been quick to respond to women before, but this was different. Much more disturbing. He liked feeling in control in relationships. But with Lacey, he was powerless.
He couldn’t be in love with her, he thought, remembering his conversation with Jack. Love was not part of his life plan. At least not for five years or so.
How could he let himself get in this position? She literally had him by the balls. And what was even more endearing was that she didn’t even know it. Just moments ago, he could see the questions in her eyes as she lay there in his bed. It killed him that he couldn’t give her any answers. There was a part of him that wanted to climb back into bed with her and assure her that he would be there for her every morning of her life with such a satisfying wake-up call.
But he couldn’t tell her that. There couldn’t be a happily-ever-after for them.
He knew what happened to women like Lacey after sex. Suddenly, the hormones kick in and they start tearing out pictures of wedding gowns, cooing over babies, and sizing up minivans. Mick couldn’t give her any of that. He had seen too many marriages fail and families shattered by the stress of Navy life, much less that of a SEAL. Some won the battle, but too many were casualties.
Until now, he had never considered that the risk might be worth taking.
No. Lacey deserved better than a high-risk relationship.
Venting his frustration on a half dozen eggs, he smashed them against the side of a bowl full-force and beat them mercilessly with a whisk.
How ironic that he stands in front of classes of mids every day droning on about honor, duty, integrity. What the hell was the honorable thing to do in a situation like this?
Break it off now?
Break it off in eighteen months or so?
Above the sizzle of the eggs cooking on the stove, Mick heard Lacey behind him. “I think you’ve beaten any life out of those eggs,” she said awkwardly.
Glancing down, Mick saw spatters of egg on the wall alongside him. Silently, he slid them out of the pan and onto a plate. His eyes couldn’t meet hers.
“So what’s on your mind, Mick? Was this was a mistake?”
Tentatively, he turned to her and took her hand. Her fingers were like ice. “Is that what you think?”
“You tell me.”
Mick drew in a breath, and then involuntarily let out a little laugh. “I can’t imagine sex that great could ever be a mistake.”
Lacey smiled, and Mick saw some of the tension leave her body.
“Lacey, I’m just terrified that I may have used you.”
She burst out laughing.
Mick was puzzled. “That’s funny?”
“Yes. I show up on your doorstep begging for sex, and you think you used me?”
Relief washed over Mick at the memory. “You were the instigator of this, weren’t you? That makes me feel better.” He shook his head in reprimand. “No. I’m your friend and you were vulnerable. You were upset about your sister and maybe you really just needed to talk it out.”
“Uh, no, Mick. If I had wanted to talk it out, I would have gone home to Maeve and Bess. What I needed—whether I knew it or not—was to have at least fourteen sequential orgasms in the span of one night of sex.”
Mick actually felt his face flush. “Fourteen? I guess I must have missed one or two.”
Lacey just smiled in answer.
He cleared his throat. “So I guess the only question is, how frequently you might need this service again?”
“Are you volunteering?”
“Hell, yeah. Look, you know the deal with me better than any woman I’ve ever known. You know where I’m headed and just how little I can offer you in the future. But right now, you have me.” He took her face in his hands. “You have my full commitment. If you want it, that is.”
Lacey’s eyes shone brightly against the smudges of yesterday’s mascara. “I want it. My career is still the first priority to me. Maybe a relationship with you—with the full knowledge that it’s leading nowhere—is the only kind I can handle right now.”
Mick pulled her onto his lap and enjoyed the feeling of having her so close.
She snuggled into him. “God, I’m trying to build a real estate career here. I’d be the last person to want to have a long-term relationship with a Navy guy who is only going to expect me to move. I’d be kissing my career good-bye.”