I can’t believe he’s saying these words. After all this time, leaving me hanging, he feels the same as I do.
I turn my body to face him. “Why did you try to stay away? Why not just be with me?”
“Because,” he says. “My life…the way I am…I’m not good for someone like you. And yet,” he smiles, “I can’t stop wanting to try.”
I can’t believe he’s saying these things to me. To know that this man in front of me feels that way about me is shocking…and a totally sexy.
“Well,” I say, lowering my voice to quiet, soft levels that he’s using. “You’re definitely in trouble for what you did.”
A grin creeps up on his lips. He takes a small step closer. “What’s my punishment?”
Now I’m grinning. What did I just start? If he expects me to do dirty talk I can’t possibly. I drop my head, embarrassed.
Jackson moves closer still, slipping his hands around my waist. He dips his head close and says, “Tell me what you want and I’ll do it.” When I don’t say anything because oh my God I am blushing so badly he says, “Should I kiss you?” I nod yes as my heart pumps wildly in my chest.
His lips meet mine and it’s like I’m home. We kiss slowly at first, tentative. When his tongue pushes softly into my mouth it’s like nothing else matters expect the feel of Jackson. I rest my hands on his biceps, so firm beneath his elegant suit, and I give them a squeeze, delighting in how strong he is. I know that nothing bad can happen when I’m in Jackson’s arms.
He tugs me closer, our hips pressed up to one another. His kiss deepens and I do the same, each of us trying to get more and more of the other. I move my hands up to his shoulders and neck, then up into his thick hair, digging into it while pressing his face closer into mine. His hands are roaming all up and down my back, our bodies mashing up against one another but it’s still not enough.
“Oh! Excuse me,” a voice says.
I quickly move away from Jackson and turn to find Jules, my boss, standing at the corner having just witnessed Jackson and me groping each other like horny teenagers.
“Jules, oh my gosh,” I say because I don’t know what to say.
Jules doesn’t seem to know either. She just gives me this look—disappointment?—and turns on her heel and walks back into the ballroom.
“Oh, great,” I say. I feel like my insides have just been frozen, recalling that look on her face. It was masked, but it was still obvious disgust.
How unprofessional could I be? Making out at a fancy fundraiser with a donor? I’m seeing shades of prostitution in that scenario. “I’m in so much trouble.”
“I’ll talk to her,” Jackson says as he rubs my back.
“No, that’ll make it worse,” I say. “I don’t need you smoothing anything over. Oh my god. Now I have to go back in there. My face must look like a mess. Am I all splotchy and red?” I turn for his inspection.
“You look absolutely beautiful,” he says. “Honestly, don’t worry about it.” He puts his arms around me again.
“So what do you propose we do?” I ask. “Stay out here and wait to get caught again?”
“No. I have a much better idea.” He whispers into my ear, “Come home with me.”
I smile, pulling back slightly to look at him. “You want to take me to your place?”
“You make it sound so seedy,” he says. “It’s not a dorm room. It’s a house.”
“And I’ll bet it’s in Back Bay.”
He gives me a look and says, “Do you want to come with me or not?”
I know that what I really should do is go back in and try to repair the damage with Jules. What I really should do is learn from past mistakes and not be involved with this man.
He’s admitted himself that he’s no good for me.
I’ve already been hurt once, and I’m sure to be hurt again.
But my pulse is already racing as I think about spending more time with him, tonight, right now. And so I find myself doing the exact opposite of what my brain says I should do.
“I want to come with you,” I whisper, and then he takes my hand and leads me outside.
Jackson
I’m kissing Emily in the car on the way to my place on Marlborough Street. I’m kissing her as we walk up the steps of the brownstone. I’m still kissing her when I insert the key and go through the front door. I kick the door shut and press her up against the wood-paneled wall and devour her some more. I just…can’t…get…enough. The way she digs her fingers into my hair, pulling me into her makes me absolutely insane. But I need to take her. I need to show her how spectacular she is, how out of control she makes me feel, and just how much I want her.