"What are you doing?" Damian asked.
"I'm doing a search. University of Florida, right? That's the one? In Gainesville?"
"Yeah," Damian bit back.
It took several seconds and Courtney realized that Nick was looking the school up on the Internet. When he next spoke, he sounded even angrier than before. "No fucking way."
"What?" Damian asked resignedly.
"Goddamn fifty-thousand students. Fifty-thousand," Nick reiterated with heat. "You want to tell me how Courtney is going to fit in with so many people when she's used to nothing but a tiny community college and before that, private, all-girls schools?
"Nick. Let's fix a drink and sit down and talk about this more rationally."
"There's nothing to talk about and I don't want a fucking drink."
"What do you want, exactly?" Damian asked. "Mother's not going to believe we don't have enough money for the tuition. It's a trivial amount for us and mom knows it. What are you going to say to her?"
"I'm going to tell her the same damn thing that I'm saying to you. Courtney isn't ready for a school of that size. She's not ready to live that far from home--"
"Goddamnit, Nick. Florida is her home. You can act like she's your little sister all you want but that still doesn't give you the right--"
"She's not my fucking sister." The sudden venom in Nick's voice made Courtney reel back. She continued to listen in frozen shock as he continued, "She's an innocent girl and you don't seem to have a problem with throwing her into the deep-end. All I'm trying to do is protect her."
There was a sudden silence and in her imagination, Courtney saw the two men standing off and staring at each other.
"I need a drink," Damian said, a few seconds before Courtney heard footsteps. Quickly, she stood to her full height, away from the wall, bracing herself, her heart hammering in her chest. The study door was pushed open and Damian's steps faltered when he saw her loitering in the hallway. He walked up to her and looked her over, his face set in lines of tension. "You heard?"
She nodded her head while she tried to get her vocal chords to function. "Some of it," she finally answered.
Damian gave her a look of commiseration. "Don't worry about Nick. I'll get him to agree eventually," he reassured. "We've got you covered on your expenses, okay?"
She shifted uncomfortably but tried to smile. "Thanks. I'll pay you back," she answered earnestly.
Damian gave her a penetrating look and then a half-smile. "No, you won't and don't even think about it. We look after our own and you're one of us now." Courtney felt a warm glow even as she realized that those were the most words that Damian had ever spoken to her at one time. He shook his head as if to clear it and said, "I'm going to leave him to stew a bit while I fix a drink. You want something?"
"No, thanks. I think I'm going to try to calm him down." She motioned toward the study with a tilt of her head.
Damian looked taken aback. "Be careful. He's not happy about this. I don't know why he thinks your future is his prerogative to decide, but by all evidence, he does."
Courtney gave him a shaky smile. "Thanks for the warning."
Damian walked away and taking a deep breath, Courtney went into the study and closed the door behind her. She leaned against it and waited for Nick to notice her.
He faced the window, staring out, and the muscles in his broad shoulders visibly tensed as if anticipating another confrontation with his brother. As he slowly began to turn away from the window, he braced his legs apart as if ready for attack. "You're not changing my mind." His jaw was clenched and his voice dripped with intimidating determination, "There is no goddamn way she's--"
His words cut off abruptly when he saw her standing against the door. Their glances connected and she felt the same warmth cascade through her bloodstream that she felt every time she saw him. As he became aware of her presence, it was as if a metamorphosis occurred within him; his aggressive stance relaxed as the anger slowly receded from his body and his features softened.
They stood across the room and studied each other in silence. Courtney was the first to speak and she did so tentatively, "You don't want me to go away to school?"
He let out a long sigh and said very gently, "I didn't say that. I was talking about Florida."
"I don't understand," she said.
"How much did you hear?" he asked with a frown.
"A lot. I probably shouldn't have listened, but I did." His eyes grew stormy at her answer and she asked, "You don't want me to be happy?"
His lips twisted and his shoulders sagged. "The only thing I want is for you to be happy."
Watching him imploringly, she said, "I want to go to Florida, Nick. Please let me go."
His body jerked as if he'd taken a hit. "Sweetheart, you're so young." He shook his head slowly as if actually debating it but knowing it wasn't a good idea. "You've been too sheltered."
She shook her head, disagreeing with him about being too young, but unable to speak.
"You don't think you've been sheltered?" he asked.
Oh yes, she knew she'd been sheltered. If she hadn't been, she wouldn't be standing here now, imagining herself in love with him, while he only saw her as a burden, albeit one that he worried about. But she couldn't tell him those things. "I'll be okay. I'm smart, you know I am," she argued her case softly, somehow knowing that she had to make her tone of voice exactly right with him. "I'll make good choices and stay out of trouble. You won't have to worry about me."
As he listened to her, he remained silent, but his expression looked as if her words were paining him.
"Please, Nick. I'll study, I'll make good grades, and I'll . . . I'll pay you back."
His eyes narrowed. "This isn't about the money. It has nothing to do with the money."
She felt a shiver of response from the look in his eyes as his gaze held hers and all she could manage was a whispered, "Please."
He stared at her intently, as if he were being torn in two. He turned, paced a few steps away, and then abruptly faced her again. "Do you promise, do you swear to God, that you'll be careful?"
Holding her breath in anticipation, she nodded her head.
"Do you promise that you'll call me if you need anything? Do you promise you'll call me even if you do mess up and get into trouble?"
"Yes," she whispered.
His features turned to stone. "Do you promise that you won't mess up and get into trouble?"
She smiled and nodded her head and his look became more serious than she'd ever seen it. He took a deep breath and asked, "Do you promise you'll come home after you graduate?"
The oxygen hitched in her lungs as she swallowed. "I promise."
He stared straight at her but Courtney felt as if he were talking to himself. "I ought to be shot," he'd mumbled.
Courtney began to resurface from the memory of four years ago. She remembered the excitement that had built within her at his words. "I can go?" she'd asked him.
She'd never forget his sigh of defeat and the answer he'd seemed forced to make. "You can go."
The memory dissolved as she hung up another blouse. She shivered as she realized that she would be seeing him again soon, probably within a few hours. She tried to control the involuntary tremor in her legs at the knowledge.
But it was impossible.
Nick Rule had always made her tremble and he always would.
Chapter Two
Nick drummed his fingers on his desk with impatience.
Courtney was up there alone. At the top of the building. In his penthouse.
He knew she was because his mother had sailed into his office not long after Damian had left and hugged him, thanking him for letting them stay with him. She'd told him she was going to be gone all afternoon picking out flooring samples, and did he want her to pick up something for supper on the way back?
He'd smiled distractedly and answered, 'why not?'
After she'd left his office, Nick stared blankly at his screen before he closed the windows on his computer and told his secretary that he'd be out. He waited as long as he could before he rode the elevator to the top of the building. During the ride up, he seethed with frustration. The hardest thing he'd ever done in his life had been to allow Courtney to go to school in Florida. It had been ten times harder than staying away from her while she'd lived in his mother's house . . . fifty times harder . . . a hundred times harder.
While she'd lived in his mother's home and gone to community college, he'd been able to check up on her regularly. He'd been able to keep his eye on her, even if it meant dropping by to visit his mother way more often than he was comfortable with. Courtney had been right there, where he could study her eyes and try to pinpoint even the slightest change her emotions might have undergone. He could watch her, even if he couldn't touch her. He'd found that not touching her, while pure agony, was something that he could live with, if only barely. After that one horrendous misstep he'd taken on her eighteenth birthday, he'd endured not touching her as he'd waited for her to grow up, waited for her to become less vulnerable with the passing of time.
He'd struggled with his conscience the entire time. She was an orphan who lived in the family home for God's sake; he should absolutely leave her alone. His family had embraced her as if she were one of their own, and why the hell couldn't he feel the same?