Ruined: Loving An Alpha Male(98)

“You’re right, of course. I’ve told him what my intentions are, which is why I haven’t slept with him. He says he’s always had feelings for me and wants to see if we can make it. I don’t want to hurt him, but what if we are what each other needs for right now? I wouldn’t want to miss out on just being with him, you know?”

“I hear you, and I just want you to be careful,” she told me.

I nodded, and we started walking back. She asked me about Mason and what he was like when I dated him. So I told her everything. I had told her a lot about us back when we were dating, but not everything. When I told her in depth what he was like, especially in the sack, she nearly fell on her face.

“I just can’t believe he’s like that.”

She shook her head, and her eyes got wide.

“Yup,” was all I said as my body reacted to just the memory of him.

“You’re thinking about it right now, aren’t you?” she asked me.

I looked over at her and tried to play it off, but I couldn’t. She knew me better than that, and I couldn’t hide anything from her.

“Oh. My. God. I can’t believe it. I mean you have goosebumps all along your arms and chest, and it’s blazing out here. You can’t stop smiling, and your face has freaking lit up like a Christmas tree.”

I pushed her, trying to get her from watching me. “Oh, cut it out. It’s not that obvious.”

“Oh no, not to just anyone. But I can see it because I know you. Oh my, you looked the same way before when we were sitting at the table, and Diane mentioned the night she had with Mason…you were thinking about him then, too.”

“Cut it out, Kat.”

I felt my face grow flush, and I turned away from her. She laughed and jumped on my back. We are about the same height and weight. And it’s crazy, but we have the same curves and everything. She is a little darker than me, but that’s about it.

“I can’t believe he has that much of an effect on you.”

“Get off of me, you heffa.”

She held on tight and wrapped her legs around me.

“Oh no, bitch. You aren’t getting away from this conversation. You still have feeling for Mason, don’t you?”

“Fuck no and fuck him.”

“Yeah okay, whatever. Carry me back to the hotel.”

“Oh, I’ll carry you alright.”

I gripped her legs tight and ran as fast as I could toward the water. She started to squeal and squirm in my grasp, but I neither stopped nor let go. I plunged both of us in the water, just in time for a huge wave to hit us.

“Oh my God, you bitch,” she exclaimed, laughing.

“Yeah, tell me I have feelings for someone…that’ll teach you.”

I pulled up and tried to wring the excess water from my hair, when she yanked my shirt off my body. I screamed and tried to cover myself.

Kat stopped waving my shirt and looked wide-eyed at me.

“What’s that on your side? …Holy shit! You have a tattoo?”

Damn it!

“Let me see?”

“No.” I wrapped my arms around my waist.

“Oh, come on, Monk. Can’t you please let me see?”

“Hell, no. Now give me my shirt back.”

I reached for my shirt, and she played a dirty trick on me. She pulled the string off my bikini, and my top dropped to reveal my breasts. My hands quickly went to my breasts, revealing my tattoo.

Her eyes went big, and I closed mine and didn’t move.

“Did that hurt?”

Without opening my eyes, I shook my head. I felt her come closer, and she touched my side.

“Not at the time, no.”

“What does it mean? I mean, I see some dog tags that are wrapped along an anchor, and the tags have the names ‘Reaper’ and ‘Alex’ on them. But what does the anchor represent?”

I struggled to put my bathing suit top back on, without revealing myself to beach goers.

“It represents the Navy. Mason and Alex were both Navy SEALs, remember?”

“Yes, I remember. So does the anchor going through a heart represent Mason?”

“Yes, in a way it does. One of the dog tags is wrapped around the anchor, and that represents Alex.”

“What does NFNF mean beneath his name?”

“Never forget, never forgive.”

She remained silent as she continued to study my tattoo.

“Okay, have you seen enough?”

“What does the other dog tag mean around the heart?”

I sighed.

“That’s for someone that I lost as well. He was wrapped around my heart, but he squeezed all the fucking life out of me. That’s why the dog tag says ‘The Reaper.’”

Kat looked at me skeptically but didn’t say a word. What I told her was partially true. Mason was wrapped around my heart completely. So at the time I got the tattoo, that’s what I wanted it to mean. Now it means exactly what I told her. She gave me my shirt back, and I held it in my hand.