Ruckus (Sinners of Saint #2)(71)

Her orgasm exploded on my fingers, and she cried out, her lips parting in desire. I had to shove my forearm into her mouth to muffle her scream. Apparently, Rosie enjoyed being fingered so much, she rolled around on her back and sat on top of me, straddling me in the dark before I had the chance to react.



       
         
       
        

I still wasn't sure if she was asleep or awake. She looked somewhere in-between. Her eyes were glazed-over, her lips red, open and inviting as she grinded against me, her bare pussy brushing my naked cock.

I desperately wanted to fuck her, but we still hadn't talked about one little thing. (And no, it wasn't the fact that I was in love with her sassy ass. She neither acknowledged nor heard it, probably, and it wasn't even news to me. I always knew I loved her. Way before I admitted it to myself.)

"You on the pill?" I asked. If not, I was going to have to run real quick to the other side of the hallway and get a condom. I wasn't even sure I had any. I always kept one in my wallet, but it hadn't been replaced since that time on our first night in Todos Santos. Though I wasn't above sneaking into Vicious and Millie's room-yes, on their honeymoon night-and stealing his condoms while they were both there. Even if they were naked and fucking. That was how bad I wanted Rosie.

"No pills," she mumbled, her body leaning back and slamming into me as she pushed my dick into her pussy. Fuuuuuck.

"Baby." I grabbed her arm, kissed her wrist, the inside of her palm, and her fingertips a million times. "You're kind of asleep. And I'm kind of a jerk for sneaking in here and fingering you while you're borderline unconscious. We need a condom. Let me go grab one real quick, okay?"

But she kept going at it, Cowgirling the fuck out of me, and even though I knew it was a bad idea, my dick took charge and Yee-Haw'ed, telling me to fuck the consequences. Every time she came down on my cock and clenched against it, I wanted to plaster her to the bed and tell her to wait a minute. I even thought of flipping her over, scooting upwards and fucking her mouth with my dick to make it stop.

I tried to reason with my logic as I found myself helpless underneath her, unable to deny her what she wanted, even if it was crazy and dangerous. I'd been traumatized by Nina, but Rosie wasn't her. Even if she got pregnant, no big deal, right? Luna was cute. Even though she had a "back-poop" today and Trent made me change her diaper. And maybe I could be a good dad someday. I just wasn't sure nine months from now was a good date.

"No need, no need," Rosie muttered, picking up pace. She was still kind of asleep. For an exhausted girl, she did a stellar job of riding me. My balls tightened, and I felt the familiar rush from my spine. I was going to come. I was going to come, and Rosie wasn't on the pill.

Hey, asshole, you're also an idiot, you know that?

"Baby … " I groaned, but it was futile. I wasn't going to stop her, even if the reality of what was going to happen afterwards was going to destroy me. 

"Dean," she moaned. "Come."

And I came.

I came inside her, twice at this point, without a condom.

She collapsed onto my chest after the act, nuzzling into my neck, my cock still inside her. I felt my warm cum dripping between us, sticking to my stomach, and felt the weight of my actions. It was a million times heavier than the woman on top of me.

"I came inside," I whispered, to me more than to her.

Pressing her lips to my throat, she said, "I can't have kids."

And fell back asleep on top of me.

Fuck.





What makes you feel alive?

Love. When it is fierce and deprived. Raw and delicious. But it also reminds me that one day-soon-it will all end for me.



WE SPENT THE FLIGHT BACK home holding hands and making out.

Waking up next to him felt like a dream. The irony didn't escape me, but then everything about our relationship was dunked in satire. Dean was so careless, sneaking into my room and fingering me while I slept, but I was quick to reciprocate. I remembered riding him, lazy and slow, my clit rubbing against his tight abs. I took what I needed, then dozed off back to sleep. I was so dog-tired-my legs were sore, my lungs needed a break from life, and my head was still pounding with the music and general noise-I was twirling on the line between unconsciousness and awareness of my surroundings.

On the plane, I told Dean about my conversation with Millie, casually skipping the part where he'd asked me to move in with him over text messages yesterday. Not that I didn't want that. Because I did. But for now, I just wanted to enjoy him. I wasn't going to make the same mistakes I did with Darren. I wasn't going to rush into commitments, and even though I knew that Darren and Dean were nothing alike (for one thing, my feelings for Dean drove me straight into the arms of insanity, and that bitch knows how to clutch you tight to her chest), this time, I wasn't going to screw this up.