I spend another ten minutes hearing her laugh her ass off and swear off ever having ankle biters, and ring off to go check on the Terribles, when the doorbell rings.
“Hi, Ash, just brought you the mail. Frank said to tell you Ben’s got a soccer practice today and he’ll get him from school.”
“Thanks, Pete.”
The mail is not something I usually go through, since Luc pays the bills and takes care of RSVPs and other stuff, so I’m mystified when I see a large, brown envelope with my name on it at the top of the pile.
I shouldn’t have opened it, I think ten minutes later when I almost fall flat on my ass as pain hits my chest and robs me of breath.
Inside are at least a dozen photos of Luc going into a hotel, a leggy blonde hanging on his arm, her lustful gaze staring up at him adoringly.
I want to disbelieve the pictures and write it off to his old life when he was a good for nothing playboy with more dick than brains, but the time and date stamps in the corner are irrefutable proof that my adoring husband spent last night with a woman who is most definitely not his wife.
One who is hot and thin and…blonde!
“You son of a bitch. You slime-eating toad. You cheating, whoring liar!”
I might sound angry, and somewhere deep inside I am. I just can’t get to the rage, seeing as my heart hurts so bad I can’t breathe.
“Mrs Jasper? Your husband is on the phone, ma’am,” I hear from the right, turning my tear-filled eyes toward her, though I can hardly see for my tears.
“Uh, tell him I…please tell him I’m feeding one of the Terribles,” I beg, hating that she’s seeing me in this condition but unable to stop the tears and gather the strength or courage to go to the phone.
Part of me wants to throw them away and pretend it’s not real. It would be so easy. But I know me, and no matter how crappy it would make me feel, I can never accept this.
This is the deal breaker, the one thing I can never look past and forgive. I’d given myself to him and more than kept up my end of things. I’d surrendered everything, and, and…how could he!
“I’ll tell him, ma’am. Come to the kitchen. I’ll make you some tea.”
I don’t want tea! I want to go back to twenty minutes ago, when I was mooning over my guy and plotting ways to get him to change Juju’s diaper.
I want to go back to the last night we spent together, when he was so deep inside me I couldn’t breathe without sharing his breath. I want to go back to the way he’d looked at me like I was the only thing in the world that made sense to him.
You should have known this would happen, Ash! How could you forget the things he said to you? How could you forget that he thinks you betrayed him?
That’s when I let myself go and just collapse in front of the sofa, my body slumping even as my brain starts whirling, taking me back to a time I don’t want to remember but can’t forget.
The day I broke his heart.
“I’m so sorry about your mom and dad, Chris. You must be devastated.”
“Yeah, it’s a hard blow. They just had their twentieth anniversary, and we had this big party and…”
He trails off and hangs his head, so I come away from the side of the school building and lay a hand on his shoulder, feeling shitty about everything that’s going on, on top of our breakup.
I love Chris, always have, but things between us were more friendly, almost like siblings, and I’d been trying to find a way to break it off gently when Lucian swept in and turned my world upside down.
Now we’re together and so in love I’m terrified about what will happen when he leaves to go back home.
“Chris, maybe you should go home and talk to your folks. Tell them how you feel,” I murmur, feeling awkward all of a sudden.
I need to get home and get ready for the date Luc is taking me on, and I’m definitely in need of a leg shave if I’m gonna try to get him to take our relationship past the kissing stage.
“You were always so smart and kind. I can’t believe I lost you too.”
I back up at that hard tone and look into his face, feeling my heart squeeze when he comes closer, his body no more than an inch away from mine.
“We were so good together, weren’t we, Ash? Why didn’t we make it?” he asks softly, his hands stroking my cheek in a way he never has before.
Alarm bells are ringing in my head, and I shake my head once, trying to smile through my discomfort.
“We’re better as friends, Chris. Look, I gotta go—”
He kisses me before I can finish my sentence and slip out from beneath his arm, his mouth digging my lips into my teeth so hard I taste blood. I try to turn away and shove at his chest, but he’s so strong all I end up doing is getting my arms trapped between us when his arms fold around me.