“It’s just that…I wasn’t sure I followed the directions right.”
“A little flour, baking soda, eggs, and milk?”
He kept twisting that paper towel and refused to look at her. Something else was going on. She thought about his shock when he noticed her watching him. Like he was pissed off she’d found him in the kitchen. Reading a cookbook, mouthing the words.
And then something occurred to her. Did she dare mention it?
“Ash?”
He looked up. The bruising behind his eyes was gone, replaced by a childlike innocence she’d never seen before.
She said a quick prayer that she was doing the right thing. “Can you…read?”
For an instant, he looked like an abused puppy about to get kicked, but then it disappeared. He dropped his gaze and a muscle in his jaw flexed as he tried to decide how to answer. When he spoke, she could barely hear him. “I can. A little. But sometimes the letters get turned around and I’m not sure what it says.”
Was Ash…dyslexic? Her best friend in school had been, so Olivia knew what some of the signs were. “Do letters seem to move around on the page when you try to read?”
He nodded but said nothing.
“Do you have trouble adding up money, or mix up your lefts and your rights?”
He still wouldn’t look at her. “Yeah, but not always. Usually when I’m in a hurry or stressed out.”
She exhaled slowly. That would explain why he couldn’t spell out his name for the investigators at the scene of the explosion. If any situation was high stress, that one had been.
Without warning, he tossed his plate onto her desk and stormed to the other side of the room. Dust motes floated in the air around him as he stared into the back parking lot. She was losing him. He was closing himself off to her when she desperately wanted in. One wrong word from her and he’d be out the door again.
“Ash,” she said softly. “I think you might be dyslexic.”
“Is that another name for stupid?”
Her heart tore from her chest. “No, you’re definitely not stupid.”
“Then what does it mean?” He turned to face her, his cheeks flushed, his eyes as dark as ebony and glistening with emotion. “I can’t think with my head, Liv.” He held a finger to his temple like a gun. “Everything becomes a jumbled mess in here. I’m only good at stuff I do with my hands. Fighting and building engines. That’s it.”
She came around the desk and approached him, taking care not to step on Conry’s tail. Ash tried to step away, but she grabbed his hands and jerked him toward her. Then she kissed his palms. “It just means you’re better with images and actions than you are with words and numbers. That’s it. Everyone learns and processes information differently. It definitely does not mean you’re stupid.” She remembered some of the challenges Helena had faced in school. The bullies. The name-calling. The snickers she got when she had to go to the learning center. Olivia gripped his hands tighter. Had Ash gone through something similar when he was growing up?
“If I ever hear anyone calling you stupid or even hinting that you’re anything less than amazing, they’ll be sorry. And that goes for you too,” she said, giving another little squeeze to emphasize her point. “And I’m not kidding, either.”
It looked as though he were trying not to smile, and the tension in his shoulders disappeared.
She told him about her friend, who was now a successful interior designer with her own business. But when Helena was younger, she struggled with some of the same issues. Olivia told him how she’d punched a kid on the playground for calling her friend a retard. “I got sent to the principal’s office for that one, but he never did it again.”#p#分页标题#e#
Without warning, Ash pulled her close, slamming her against his chest. His mouth crashed down against hers, stealing the breath from her lungs. His lips were everywhere, kissing her neck, her cheeks, the sensitive patch of skin behind her ear.
“How do you do this to me, Olivia? You’ve worked your way past all my defenses—defenses that I thought were iron strong. You’ve bared my soul and taken over my heart. How can you possibly think you know me better than I know myself?”
“Because I’m falling in love with you,” she said, the confession flying from her mouth.
A little sound came from his throat. Gripping her tighter, he held on as though he thought she might slip through his hands.
“What do you mean think I know?” She pulled away slightly. “You’re wrong if you don’t see yourself as I do, it’s as simple as that. You’re a passionate, fierce man who fights for what’s right, no matter the personal cost or consequence. You’re a champion of those without a voice.” He tried to protest, but she shut him down with a finger to his lips. “What goes on in a man’s head does not define his character, Ash. It’s your actions that make you who you are. Someone can think all they want about doing this or that, but until they do something—take action—their intentions mean nothing.” She poked his chest, right over his heart. Maybe a little too hard, because he winced. “It’s what’s in here that counts. I could give a rat’s ass if a p looks like a d to you. And anyone with half a brain would agree with me.”