"Do you have any idea who would've killed Maman? She didn't have an enemy in the world."
"I have an idea. Working on how to put it all together. When I do, then I'll tell Lille and Henri. Just keep it to yourself, okay? I wanted to tell you ‘cause I know you went to see Pa a lot, and you were the only one out of all of us who couldn't believe he killed Maman."
She shook her head. "I still can't believe all this. Thanks for telling me. It makes the whole tragedy less horrific to know Pa was innocent." Rock placed his hand over hers and squeezed it.
They stood like that until Clotille came in. "A good shower feels wonderful after a workout. It's so quiet around since your kids went back to school. It was adorable the way Michael danced around the house after you came home with his school supplies. I don't think I was ever that excited about school."
Isa laughed and wiped the corner of her eyes. She slid her hand from under Rock's and stood up. "I have a ton of errands to do." She glanced at the wall clock. "Damn, look at the time. I have to run." She rushed out of the kitchen. Rock watched her until she was gone.
"Everything okay?" Clotille asked, grasping his hand.
"Yeah. We gotta think ‘bout heading back. The club business is going to be finished in a couple days. I gotta go back home." He skimmed her face, noticing the way her eyes darted away from his. "You wanna go back with me, don't you?"
She nodded. "Armand called. You were right about Suzette. Anyway, I promised him I'd call my mom. I was going to do that this morning."
Rock's face hardened. He didn't like that she changed the fucking subject. Doesn't she want to come back with me? What the fuck's going on with her? "Isn't your mom going to be pissed at you?"
"Probably, but Armand acted like a big brother to me. Finally. It's taken what … twenty-nine years? Not too bad." She rolled her eyes and laughed.
"That's good. People can change as they get older. And sometimes life handing you a crock of shit can do it too. You and your family hit rock bottom after your dad died. That shit would have an impact on most people."
"True." She picked up his hand and kissed it. "I'm happy with you."
"Then why the fuck are we talkin' ‘bout everything but us? You comin' back with me, or am I goin' alone? Don't fuckin' bullshit me, Clotille."
She kissed his hand again. "I'm going back with you." She blinked several times.
She's fuckin' hedging. What the hell's the matter with her? He nodded. "Good. You call your mom, and I'm going to hang with my brothers. We got shit to discuss. I'll be back later."
Her face dropped but he didn't give a damn. The bitterness threatened to leak out of the compartment he'd locked it in for the last ten days. I gotta get outta here before I say something I'm going to regret. He rose from the table. "See you later." He strode toward the back door.
"Aren't you going to kiss me before you leave?" Her small voice held hurt, sadness, and regret.
He spun around, went up to her, and gave her a quick peck on her lips, moving away before her raised arms hooked around his neck. He slammed the screen door and sprinted to his Harley. Clenching the handlebars, he switched on his engine and broke the sound barrier with his cams. He sped away, forcing himself not to look back. If he did he would go to her, and he didn't want to. He had a funny feeling she was going to shatter his heart again. Hardness inched its way through him as he rode to the Devil's Legions' clubhouse to meet up with his Insurgents brothers.
* * *
She leaned against the kitchen counter looking out the window, hoping he'd turn around and smile at her as he rode away, but he didn't. He hadn't even looked back before he roared away.
Why did he have to bring up the future today? I was hoping we could ride into Abbeville, have lunch, stroll around the town, and hold each other. I love him so much, but I'm scared he's going to run away from me when I tell him about all the lies and secrets I've kept in my heart. He deserves to know, but in telling him I'm pretty sure I'll lose him forever. I can't be selfish. If he walks away from me then he does. I love you so much, Roche.
She gripped the kitchen counter as she continued to stare out the window, hoping she'd see a flash of chrome come around the corner. He'd only been gone a few minutes and she was already missing him terribly. I can't lose you, cher. I love you so much. He was everything she'd wanted. She breathed in deeply and vowed to talk to him when he came home and tell him everything she had in her heart-the past, the present, and, hopefully, the future. And she'd make sure nothing interrupted their conversation. That night would either be a new beginning for them, or their final good-bye. Either way, she had to come clean.
She pushed away from the counter and picked up her phone, sitting back down as she plugged in her mother's phone number.
"Clotille? How wonderful to hear from you. How are you doing?"
"Okay. How are you, Mom?"
"Busy with all the different committees. I don't know why I take on so much. How's Frederick?"
She swallowed hard, then exhaled. "I've left him," she whispered, waiting for her mother's tirade of insults on what a fool she was.
"When? Why?"
"A few weeks ago. I couldn't live with him anymore. It wasn't working for me. I was dying inside." Silence. If she didn't hear her mother breathing, she'd have thought they'd been disconnected. "I know you're disappointed. I'm sorry."
"Where are you?"
"Lafayette. I needed time to think before I called you. I was so confused. I know I've made the right decision. I can help you financially. I just couldn't stay with him anymore," her voice cracked at the end.
"When your father died in the arms of that trashy woman, I was mortified. But when he left us destitute after spending all the money on her and the gambling tables, I was devastated. I didn't know how to be poor, and I was desperate to get my old life back. That's why I pushed you into being with Frederick. He could help us financially, and he was able to help you get your life on track. He took care of everything. Now things are different. I've made some sound investments. I don't need his money."
"I also agreed to be the woman he wanted me to be. I did it primarily for the family. To give you a good life. I'm happy I've done that, at least."
"If Frederick isn't for you anymore, then you did right in leaving him."
Clotille's heart soared. "Do you really mean that, Mom?"
"Of course. Where are you staying?"
"With friends."
"I insist that you come stay with me for as long as you like. I want to see you. It's been too long."
"I can come by to visit today if you're not busy."
"What time?"
"In an hour. Is that good?"
"Make it two hours. That'll work much better."
"See you soon."
Clotille leaped up in the air after she slipped her phone in her pocket. With her mother and Armand in her court, that part of her life was unfettered, and it would make things more bearable if Rock ended up throwing her aside after they had their talk. She'd been so worried her mother would've been furious at her for leaving Frederick-the goose with the golden egg, as her mother had called him-that she almost didn't call her. But she was so happy she had. She rushed to her room to fix up before she left.
Two hours later, Clotille paid the cab driver and walked up the stairs to her mother's home. She rang the doorbell, her stomach fluttering with thousands of butterflies. The door swung open and her mother greeted her with a wide smile. She looked older since Clotille had last seen her, but her forehead still had the perpetual crease that deepened when she was angry or upset. New frown lines had cropped up above her nose and the sides of her mouth. Her hair was still black and from the way her eyes stayed wide, Clotille guessed she'd had an eye lift fairly recently.
"Clotille, come in." Her mother hugged her stiffly, then moved aside so she could enter. "Let's go to the sun room. It's so bright and lovely in there. How do you like my house?"
"It's beautiful." You've put Frederick's money to good use. "Isn't the house too big for just you?"
"I love mansions. The bigger, the better." She laughed and led them to a sunny room filled with gorgeous plants and flowers. Overstuffed furniture gave the room a very homey feel. A pitcher of lemonade sat on the glass-topped coffee table, a plate of cookies beside it. "Help yourself."