But, oh God, it does hurt.
He releases my hair to grip my other hip and pumps himself into me, growling, as he comes, shuddering behind me.
He pulls out, yanks off the condom and tosses it into the trash, zips up and stands behind me, panting.
I can’t look at him. I’m so ashamed, and I just want him to go.
“Now you’ve fucked a rock star. How do you feel?”
“Like everyone else you fuck. Used and ready for you to leave,” I respond without looking at him.
“Jesus,” he whispers, and I hear him scrub his hands over his face. “Stand up.”
“Go away, Leo.”
“Sam…”
“Go away,” I whisper and lean my forehead on the countertop. I will not look at him. I will not talk to him.
If I do, I’ll beg him to stay and forgive me, and it’s just better if he hates me.
After a long minute, he sighs and walks to the door. I don’t look up when I hear the door open, or for a few long minutes after it closes.
I just stay here, leaning against the counter top and let the tears come.
Chapter Six
~Leo~
I shouldn’t have left her.
I shouldn’t have fucked her against her kitchen island like a complete arrogant asshole.
She shouldn’t have been such a bitch. How can someone who looks so sweet turn up the bitchiness so fast? Who the fuck does she think she is?
No woman is worth this bullshit.
I’ve been sitting in the townhouse for two days. I can’t write. I can’t sleep.
I’m fucking sick of myself.
So I climbed into my Camero and have been driving around the city, windows down, the hard metal sounds of The End of Grace blaring through my speakers, with no destination in mind.
I just need to drive.
I turn a corner and pull through an open gate and stop the car, throw it in park, and cut the engine, the sound abruptly cutting off with it, and stare straight ahead for a few minutes.
Jesus, I can’t even think straight.
I blink and look around and realize that I’ve driven to Meg’s place, and she’s standing in the doorway, leaning against the doorjamb, arms crossed over her chest, watching me with a frown.
Shit. She’s going to bust my balls. But I need to talk to someone, and she’s the only one I trust with this.
The guys in the band would razz me for the rest of my life if they knew I was this hung up on a woman.
What is wrong with me?
I climb out of the car, and slam the door. “Why is your gate open?”
“Why do you look like shit?”
“Fuck you.” I push my hand through my hair and glare at her and she smirks back at me.
“You’re not my type.” She loses her pretty smile and holds a hand out for me. “Come on.”
I take her hand and follow her into her house. She moved in with Will Montgomery last weekend. I’m glad she’s happy. She deserves happiness more than just about anyone I know after the shitty way her life started.
But if he hurts her, I’ll fucking kill him with my bare hands.
“Are you hungry?” she asks.
“No, mom,” I reply sarcastically, and she sticks her tongue out at me.
“Coffee?” she asks.
“Yeah.”
She pours us each a mug of coffee, black, and we grab a stool at her breakfast bar.
“Gonna tell me who she is?” she asks.
Damn, she’s perceptive. She always was. I’d forgotten how much I missed that over the past few years.
I shake my head and look down into my coffee. Isn’t this why I drove here?
“I’ve been seeing Sam.” I mutter softly and take a sip of coffee, ignoring her look of shock.
“Samantha Williams?” She asks.
“That’s the only Sam I know.”
“I just saw her on Saturday.”
I shrug at her. I did too, and it went from bliss that morning to the biggest fucking mess that night.
“So what’s the problem?” Meg asks.
“We both fucked up,” I respond and laugh humorlessly. “Big time.”
“I need more info. Start at the beginning. Don’t leave out any of the sex.” She pulls her feet up under her in her stool and settles in for a story.
“I’m not telling you about my sex life.”
“Okay, tell me the rest.”
“I’ve been running with her every morning,” I start and she nods thoughtfully.
“That sounds like a good thing.”
“It’s been great. And then we sort of fell into bed and now she won’t speak to me.” I clench my hands into fists as the frustration returns full force.
“From what the groupies said back in the day, you were a better lay than that.” Meg laughs, and I know she’s trying to be funny, but it’s like a slap in the face all over again.