It's funny how life works.
It's beautiful how it sounds.
Blake
I used to sleep like a dead dog buried under six feet of winter snow. Not a sound could rouse my sorry ass out of bed. And now the slightest twitch sends me flying to my feet. But I wouldn't want it any other way. A soft rasping sound comes from the front as my lids struggle to unglue themselves this morning. The sun is out-first time in a week. It's rained on and off as a big cloud cover squatted over all of North Carolina, but today that spotlight shines down from the sky and my eyes can't quite adjust.
The knock at the door becomes more animated, and I head over before they wake up Ben. I peer into his bassinet a moment. He's sound asleep with his perfect tiny lips smacking away just the way his dad used to do. His hair is coming in thick and black, he's unmistakably a Daniels. I know it for a fact because the paternity test came in. That was me removing any shadow of a doubt. Now that the air is clear, I can breathe easy and focus on raising my son. Olivia hasn't come around once, and there's a sickening ache in the pit of my stomach wondering if this is her big debut in the role of mommy.
I look through the peep hole. Nope, better. It's Annie-the only woman I ever want Ben to view as his mother.
"Here's the morning sun," I say swinging the door wide open. Baya and Roxy stand behind her. "An estrogen ambush before eight a.m.? Get in here, girls."
Annie plants a kiss on my lips and gives my ass a discrete tweak before filing in. I do a double take as she strides on by. Hot damn. This girl is smoking with her black leather jacket-tight as all hell jeans.
"What's going on ladies?" Annie doesn't need to dress to impress. I'm already hers in every single way. But leather before breakfast has my suspicions aroused.
"Where's my boy?" Roxy gravels it out, as she heads straight to the bedroom. It's an odd friendship we've developed-Cole, too, although I can relate to him a little better.
Annie wraps her arms around my neck. "I have a surprise for you." Her bright red lips press together as she holds back a smile. Annie doesn't normally wear lipstick, so already I'm intrigued.
"Can we pause for a minute so I can tell you how drop dead gorgeous you look today? What's the surprise? You in a beauty pageant this afternoon?"
"Ha, ha." Annie's voice has smoothed out, even and seamless. You would never know that she's only been using it on a regular basis for the last few weeks. "I am doing something beautiful this afternoon-with you."
"That's right!" Baya sings. Baya is always a little overloaded with energy. Roxy balances her out nicely. "Now go on and get." She motions for us to shuffle out the door. "I've got a baby to snuggle with."
Roxy comes out of the bedroom with a freshly changed, and bright-eyed Benji. "Look who's awake!" Baya and Annie flock to him like he's a lead singer on a full house night. Annie is determined to teach him how to sign, and I'm all for it. It's about time I became proficient in it as well. Annie says it's ingrained in who she is. She still does it with her mother and brothers.
"I remember when all the girls in the room used to flock to me."
Annie rolls her eyes. "I'd better get this guy out of here before his ego blows off the ceiling. Bye sweetie." She pecks a kiss to Ben's cheek, and my heart melts. Annie guts me each time she loves all over Ben. I can get used to this. For the first time since losing my brother, I'm starting to feel whole again-hell, I do.
"By the way"-Roxy hands him off to Baya as she makes her way to the kitchen and plucks a bottle out of the fridge-"I'll be watching him tonight while you play at the Black Bear."
"Sounds good, but I don't play at the Black Bear anymore." Haven't in months.
Annie slings her arm around my waist. "Yes, you do."
"Says who?" I'm hoping she'll say her brothers because I wouldn't want them hitting me over the head with my guitar when I show up.
"Says me." Her brows hike. "And Bryson and Holt may have agreed to it. They also may have groveled a bit. It turns out nothing sold more beer and bourbon than your singing." She wrinkles her nose. "What do you say? You think the band has it in them to do another run?"
"I know they do." I trap her bottom lip between mine and pull back. "Thank you. That's a great surprise."
"You're welcome, but that wasn't the surprise. Now get ready before I change my mind."
* * *
I shower and dress before Annie and I jump in my truck and hit the road.
"You know I was just thinking, I could teach you to drive sometime."
"Really?" Her face lights up. "I would love that. I think I'm ready." She bounces in her seat. I love to see her excited, happy, squealing with pleasure, usually when she's naked and wrapped around my body like a vine.
Annie gives me vague instructions, eventually navigating us to the doorstep of Joe's Automotive.
"Am I pulling a Saturday shift?" God knows if the old man sees me, it's not outside the realm of possibilities.
"Let's find out." Annie lures me out of the truck with a curl of her finger. She's wearing boots that cover her knees, and, holy hell, she just gets hotter by the minute.
Annie takes me by the hand and walks me to the back of the garage until we're both staring at a steel horse I swore I'd never get on again. Same make and model that Benji was on when he died. Shit. I back away like it's a snake.
"I can't do this."
"Yes"-she pulls me back by the fingers-"you can, and you should." Annie presses a warm kiss against my neck. "You're my hero, Blake." Those doe eyes of hers blink up at me, and the pressure is on. I know what I need to do. But can I? "I don't want you to fear anything. I don't think your brother would either."
That's all I need to hear. Joe comes over and hands me the keys.
"You have quite the persuasive girlfriend here." He winks at Annie. "She's a looker, too."
"Keep your eyes to yourself," I say as I dig out a pair of helmets for the both of us. Annie squeezes hers over the top of her head, and my boner starts ticking to life. "She is a looker."
Annie and I get on the bike. She shows me a pair of earplugs before lifting her helmet and putting them in. I love that she needs them. Nothing pleases me more.
I start her up, and the beast roars to life beneath us. My eyes close a moment. This, right here, is what Benji did last.
"Where we headed?" Annie shouts.
"I know just the place." I rev the engine, and we take off.
We tear up concrete all the way there.
* * *
The lookout is magnificent this crisp winter morning. The snow is still piled high in the shade, but it's the sun and its radiance that steals the show.
"So beautiful," I say holding Annie. "And I mean you." I press a kiss to her lips.
"How was it?" She nods toward the bike.
"Freedom. It was freedom." I brush my lips over hers. "Thank you for giving me that." I close my eyes a moment too long and see an image of Benji cussing me out as he left our apartment that last day. I haven't talked to anyone about that moment-what really transpired, what I said that sent him flying out the door in a rage. "The afternoon my brother died-the last thing that happened between the two of us was a knock down, drag out fight." I grimace. "He got a couple good punches in, but it was the words that hurt the most."
"I'm so sorry." Her face grows pale. "Can I ask what happened?"
I swallow hard. "It was about Olivia. She was getting ready to leave my brother. She couldn't care less that she was carrying his child-any child for that matter. I caught her with another guy the night before at a bar. Her mouth was all over his, and it killed me to know she was doing that stuff to Ben while carrying his kid." I take a breath and let the words fly around me like prisoners that finally had the balls to escape.
"That's terrible. You did the right thing in letting him know."
"I should have waited. He thought maybe I was gunning to get her back-believe me, that was the furthest from the truth."
"Do you remember the last thing you said to one another?" She winces.
"He told me to stay the fuck out of his life, and I told him no problem. He took off, leaving his helmet behind. The rest is-the end of our story."
"That's not true. You're raising Ben. The story between you and your brother continues through that little boy. You're making everything right. You already have."