Anger burned bright in his gaze when he swung back at her. “Careful, Allison.”
“Look at the thousands you’ve spent on this wedding. How does it feel trying to buy Jenny’s love?”
“I’m not trying to buy her love but her forgiveness!” he roared.
She stepped back, unable to look away from the raw pain in his eyes. “What do you mean?”
“You know why my parents were on the road that night, Ali?” He prowled closer. “Takeout. They were picking up dinner. Nothing more pressing than a few orders of chicken.” She retreated as he pressed forward. “My mother asked if I’d run out to get it, but I said I was studying for a test.” His laugh was filled with enough pain to make her flinch. “Really, I was in the middle of a video game I didn’t want to pause. So they went out to run the errand I should have done, and because of that, Jenny had to grow up without parents.”
“It’s not your fault,” she whispered.
“Of course it is. Had I been less lazy, less self-centered it would have been me hit by that car. Me on the slab in the morgue.”
“Your parents wouldn’t have wished that.”
“You can’t know that.”
“But I can,” she said, closing the distance between them. “I know what it feels like to love someone and want to do whatever you can to keep them from harm.” She cupped his face. “No one could love you the way your parents did and wish for you to carry this kind of guilt. I’ve seen Jenny with you. There is not one bone in her body that blames you in any way.”
His hands wrapped around her wrists.
“I know something else,” she breathed before he could tear her away. “No parent would want their child to encase their heart in ice the way you have. They’d want you to find someone to love as much as they must have loved each other.” She swallowed hard. “I’m right here, Darian. I love you. Why can’t you just let me?”
For a second she thought she saw his eyes soften. Please, she thought. Care about me enough to take a chance. Love me enough to see what we could be.
But as she watched, his face hardened.
“I will not lose someone else I care about.” He released her wrists and stepped back.
Her hands dropped to her side as an emptiness she’d never known before ripped open in her chest.
“If you’re going to go, go,” he said, every word a dagger in her heart. “But don’t come back, because I assure you, I won’t be waiting.”
Tears clogged her throat, but she refused to shed them. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction.
“I’ve seen you be a god in the boardroom, never making the slightest mistake,” she said. “This right here? It’s a mistake you’ll regret forever.”
Turning her back on the last four years of her life, she swept out of the office.
Chapter Eighteen
At five in the morning, her alarm went off.
Out of habit, Allison swung from her bed and headed into the bathroom. She was halfway through brushing her teeth before remembering she had no reason to be up this early.
There was no work to go to.
The familiar wave of pain crashed over her, stealing her breath for a moment. She never had to walk into King Enterprises again. Nor see the man who had broken her heart.
Rinsing her mouth, she headed into the kitchen. Sleep would be impossible to return to, so she might as well have a cup of coffee. It took only a few minutes to have a fresh pot brewing. As she waited, her eyes strayed to the orchid pot on her counter.
The edges of the petals were turning a damning brown.
“Hell,” she breathed, reaching for the plant. She’d known she’d kill it, of course, but did it have to pick today of all days to take a turn for the worst?
“Stupid flower.” She didn’t need it. She didn’t need any reminder of the broken man that had thrown her away.
After filling her cup with coffee, she dropped onto her sofa and switched on the news. Today was the first workday she’d had off in longer than she could remember. It was unsettling not to be engaging in the same routine she’d followed for four years.
Everything will be different now, she thought. No more padded paychecks to fall back on. No more building full of people to rely on.
No more Darian.
Rolling her head back on the couch, she stared at the ceiling. It shouldn’t be a surprise. She knew everything would end when he found out she was switching jobs. But did it have to end so badly? Had it been necessary to rip out her heart when the romance ended?
Every time she closed her eyes she pictured his face when he’d finally confessed how his parents had died. No wonder he held everyone at arm’s length. She couldn’t imagine spending all her adult life blaming herself for something so awful.