How had he ever forgotten that? How had he let himself become so lost? He might be able to blame a lot of things on Kim, but that part of it was his to own, wasn't it? He'd let go of things he hadn't had to lose, and in the process, he'd defined his world so narrowly that there'd been almost nothing left.
He saw that now. Saw how he'd spiraled. And saw the truth of the Raven Riders-they were his family. They'd always been his family. As surely as if they were blood.
The realization was a total fucking eye-opener. And it made him feel like he'd found something for which he'd been looking for a long damn time.
The only thing that sucked was how hard it was to keep his hands off Cora. Now that he'd acknowledged his feelings-and admitted them to her-he was done playing it cool, playing it safe, playing it like the world didn't matter.
After being disengaged for so long, he didn't want to waste even one more second letting everything pass him by. He'd wasted too many precious seconds already. Having watched his kids' mother die so young, he had no illusions that time was on his side-on anyone's side. And he wanted to truly live again before fate made him say his last good-bye.
Sitting beside him in a section of stands reserved for the club, Cora touched his arm and pulled him from his thoughts. "I should head up to the clubhouse soon to help set everything out. I think Haven was planning to go up around nine-thirty and I told her I'd definitely be there by ten."
Slider glanced at the big electronic board at the end of the field. It was nine-thirty now, so he nodded. "Let me find the boys and I'll run you up."
"You don't have to do that, Slider. Stay and have fun. I'll just see you there later."
He appreciated the offer, he really did. But he was enjoying her company more than the races, and that was truly saying something. "No, sweetheart, I'm with you."
She turned toward him, her thigh against his. "This no-kissing thing is hard."
He chuffed out a little laugh and arched a brow. "So hard, Cora. It's so fucking hard." She laughed and smiled and blushed at his innuendo, and it lit him up inside to think that maybe he was capable of making another person so happy.
The boys, however, were definitely not happy to go. "Aw, Dad, can't we stay till the end?" Sam asked with Ben's full agreement.
"They're welcome to hang with me. I got a million little jobs they can help with," Phoenix said. The kids had been shadowing him all night, and he was being a really damn good sport to humor them. Slider appreciated it, he really did. But it also made him a little sad, because it was usually Jagger, the club's Race Captain, they stuck to like glue because he was-until recently-the man in charge. And he was really good with them, too. Making them feel important and needed and useful.
Damn, Slider hadn't thought about that in a long time, and it made his gut squeeze that much harder over the injustice keeping Jagger locked up.
"Yeah, Dad, can we?" they asked in unison.
"Okay," Slider said, clasping hands with Phoenix. "Thanks for letting them hang."
"What, are you kidding? These are the coolest munchkins in the whole place."
"Hey, I'm not a munchkin!" Ben yelled, setting off a mini wrestling match that Slider grinned and walked away from.
Out in the parking lot, he asked, "Your car or my truck? We can leave the other parked here and grab it on the way out later."
"I don't care, but I'm only three rows back. You?" Cora's car was closer, so they headed to the end of the aisle near the trees . . . where it was really dark because the overhanging branches filtered out the stadium's light.
Slider frowned. "Sweetheart, is now a bad time to mention that I feel pretty fucking protective of you and therefore the fact that you chose this creepy-ass parking space is making me kinda nuts?"
She chuckled and gave his stomach a swat. "It wasn't dark when I parked."
"Yeah, but that just means you gotta think of it beforehand," he said, his mind unhelpfully imagining a dozen bad scenarios. Not here at the track, necessarily, because after the attack on the club over the summer, they'd buttoned up security all around their property. But in general, he needed her to look out for herself when he wasn't there to do it. And, damn, it had been a long time since he'd had to worry about from which direction bad news might strike his life. He wasn't sure how he felt about that part of reengaging with the world-and with his heart.
And of course, the driver's door was closest to the woods.
"Okay, I will. I wouldn't want you worrying about the boys not being safe anyway."
He followed her around to her door and boxed her up good and tight against the red fiberglass. "Aw, hell, no. This is not about the kids. I have zero worries about their care or safety when they're in your presence. Understand?"
She nodded. "Okay."
"This is about you. And the fact that I care about you. And that I'm already pretty fucking attached over here and don't want anything to happen to you."
She relaxed against the car and put her hands on his chest. "I like Pretty Fucking Attached Slider."
Her tone stirred heat in his veins, heat made easier to ignite by the possessiveness and protectiveness he'd felt from their whole night together. "Do you now?"
She nodded. "Uh-huh. I like him a lot."
Slider leaned in. Slowly, so slowly, until his lips grazed hers, then skated to her cheek, her jaw, her neck, where he licked and nibbled his way back to her ear. "And what might make you like him even more?"
Her exhale was nearly a moan. "Hmm. Anything?"
"Anything."
"If he was making me come."
"Christ," he bit out, his cock turning to steel. "Here? Now?"
"Please?" she asked, her tone edged with desperation. "Not being able to touch you tonight has driven me crazy. I can't wait."
He didn't want her to beg for something he was only too happy to give. "Then push down your jeans and turn around."
Adrenaline was an aphrodisiac in Cora's blood. It flooded her nerves, her muscles, her senses, even as she complied with Slider's command, unhooking her jeans and sliding them and her panties down over her hips. And then she turned and braced against her car, the mild October night air tingling over her skin.
Suddenly, Slider's heat was gone, and she peered over her shoulder to find that he'd retreated a step or two. He caught her looking. "Don't mind me, Cora. I just needed to make sure I never fucking forget what you look like half naked against that car."
An excited breath rushed out of her, even as the wetness between her legs proved how urgently she needed him there. Stroking her, filling her, driving her wild. "Slider," she finally pleaded.
It was as if his name hauled him to her. His hands were at his jeans, his zipper, his cock. He fished a packet from his wallet, and tore the wrapper to reveal a condom. His fist bumped against her ass as he rolled it on, and it was so damn erotic, that little bit of contact, because it meant it was almost time.
But instead, it was Slider's fingers that plundered between her legs. "Aw, Jesus. Feel how wet you are for me." His middle finger sank deep, once, twice. Cora tilted her hips back to give him more access, her fingers scrabbling at the roof of her car, her breasts covered by her sweater but pressed against the window. The sensations were arousing as hell-the hard metal and glass of the car in front of her, and him trapping her from behind.
That thought unraveled a tendril of fear through her belly, because the last time she'd had sex from behind, well, It hadn't freaking been sex, Cora, okay? Right.
And she refused to let what it had been force her to surrender the hot satisfaction of having Slider like this, of sharing this with him, of letting him take her in such a primal way. Especially since a dirty part of her mind, a part she maybe wasn't ready for, got off on imagining Slider taking this encounter to a whole other place-a place where he pinned her arms behind her back and clamped his hand over her mouth and took her hard and relentlessly against the car . . .
"Oh, God," she moaned as he added a second finger and penetrated deep. "I need more."
"Yeah?" he rasped in her ear. "Tell me."
"I need your cock in me, Slider."
"Yeah, ya do." And then his hardness was there, at her entrance and sliding home.
Her moan was high-pitched and tortured, but standing flush against the car as they both were had his cock stroking against a place inside her that made her want to cry and beg. His chest pressed against her back and his arms came around her body, and then he hunched himself around her and took her in a series of fast, hard, grinding strokes.