My heart raced. I knew it. Something was bad. All these thoughts raced through my mind. Was it cancer? Did I have what my mom did?
“You’re having a miscarriage.”
A laugh escaped my lips. “Excuse me?”
“I’m so sorry.”
Tears welled in my eyes. My neck heated. I could feel Brett staring at me but all I could do was gape at the doctor. “I’m on the pill. How...how is that possible?” my voice cracked.
“The pill isn’t 100%, Evvie.”
My chest constricted and I took deep breaths. I was pregnant and I didn’t even know it. My baby. “Our baby.” A sob left me on a wail. I cried so hard, my body shook. My muscles tightened as I gripped my lower belly.
“I’ll give you some time. Brett, come get me when she’s ready,” the doctor said between my cries.
Tears flowed down my cheeks. I couldn’t believe I was pregnant and losing the baby. Finding out I was carrying Brett’s child and losing it all at once made gut wrenching sobs shake through me.
“I’m here, Evvie. Let it out,” Brett whispered into my ear, his voice cracking.
“Brett, I can’t...oh Brett. Our baby.” I curled into a ball, wrapping the blanket up and around me. I couldn’t deal.
Warm arms wrapped me. “You’re strong. We’ll get through this.”
I sniffed and wiped under my eyes before sitting up. “I’m so sorry.”
His brows furrowed. “Don’t you dare apologize for this.”
I looked away when a heavy hand grabbed my chin.
“Look at me.”
Tears filled my eyes but I couldn’t meet his gaze. I was losing his baby when another woman who he couldn’t stand was possibly carrying his.
“Look at me, damn it.”
I bristled at Brett’s harsh one but met his gaze.
He cupped my cheeks. “You’re going to listen to me and you’re going to listen to me good. Do you understand me?”
I sighed. “Brett.”
“Do you understand me?”
My jaw clenched. “Yes. I understand you.”
“Good. Now, Evvie.” He cleared his throat. “My sweet darling beautiful wife. You are fucking amazing. The strongest person I know. We will get through this. You will get through this.” His eyes filled with unshed tears. “I know this is hard. I can’t even begin to understand what you are going through right now but I am here. For you.”
A hard lump formed in my throat. “But the baby.”
“A half an hour ago we didn’t even know we were pregnant. I’m sorry for being a dick and for putting it harshly but, Evvie—”
“I want your baby. It makes me sick to my stomach that Claire could be carrying yours. If I have this endometriosis thing, who knows if I can even have babies,” I cried, shoving out of his grip.
He frowned. “You are my wife. My wife is not a quitter. I love you and I am sorry that this happening. If we can’t have babies naturally, we’ll adopt. I will give you a baby. Do not fucking doubt me. Either way, I will make it my life mission to make it so you can be a mother.”
At that moment, I burst into tears. “I...” I hiccupped.
“Shhh...” Brett brushed a hand over my hair, holding me tight against him. His body shook, letting out his own silent cries.
I squeezed my eyes shut and gripped his shirt tight in my hands.
“If Claire’s baby is mine, which I doubt it is...”
I looked up at him and angrily wiped my cheeks. “You…you don’t think it’s yours?”
He shook his head. “I don’t want to get your hopes up but I have a feeling it’s not.” His cheeks reddened. “I had a dream that it wasn’t. Something told me that the only baby I would have, would be with you.”
I sniffed and let out a heavy sigh. “To have this gift and then it be ripped from us…it’s breaking my heart.”
“I know, Evvie.” Brett cupped the back of my neck and placed a tender kiss on my forehead, letting his lips linger.
“I just…people every day take advantage of this. Your mom was giving the greatest gift a woman could receive and look at what she did.” Fresh tears rolled down my cheeks, dripping off my chin.
“My mother is a monster. That’s why I never wanted children. I thought it was genetic and I didn’t want my children to be raised like I was.”
I looked up at him. “You would never abuse your children.”
The corners of his lips tugged into a small smile. “I know that now. I always thought my temper would control me but when I met you…when I fell in love with you and realized that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you, I was damn determined to never be like my mother. I would be like my step mother and my father. The love they had for my sister and I was how parents should be with their children.” His voice became thick, his eyes welling over. That time, he didn’t seem angry that he was emotional. He let the tears flow.