“I need some time,” she mumbled.
Her voice was muffled by grief and cotton, but he clearly sensed her anger and betrayal. “Okay,” he agreed, summoning a chair and sitting beside the bed.
“Alone,” she huffed.
He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, thankful he no longer had to stay stern. It had been beyond difficult to speak to her so severely when all he wanted to do was whisper reassuring words in her ear. “I understand why you're angry with me, Layla, but I won't let you push me away. Take all the time you need. I'm staying right here.”
She balled her hands into fists. “Damn it, Quin, stop making me feel weak.”
With that, his control broke and he floated to the spot beside her. She wiggled away the moment he landed, and his entire body cringed as his stomach churned. “Please don't move away from me.”
“Oh you're asking now? I thought you'd moved on to demanding.”
Her words were salt in his wounds. “Layla.”
“What?”
“It's not like that.”
“That's exactly what it's like.”
“I had to make a decision, so I made it. I don't want to control you. It broke my heart to force you into that decision, but I didn't have a choice.”
“You didn't have a choice? I was the one left powerless.”
“You're not powerless,” he whispered, running his hand an inch over her hair. Her uncanny power over him made it damn near impossible for him to keep his distance.
“That's how I feel,” she snapped. “It's like I'm one of those women who let their husbands control them. I have no leverage and no guts.”
“That's enough,” he returned, rolling her over to face him. “Don't compare me to men like that and don't compare yourself to those women.”
Her bloodshot eyes narrowed. “I guess we're back to a demand and obey relationship.”
Quin was shocked by the way she was treating him, but he couldn't blame her. She was under too much stress to soundly deal with the overwhelming emotions clogging her insides. “I know you're angry,” he replied, dialing down the heat, “and I understand why, but you know that's not how our relationship works. I have no desire to control the women in my life…”
“Only when it’s necessary,” she interrupted. Then she rolled over and buried her face.
“Don't you understand why?” he asked, gripping the blankets so he wouldn't grip her.
“I do understand why,” she conceded, “but I still can't believe you used our relationship like you did. You have complete power over me, Quin. You could lift me up or tear me down in a heartbeat. I'm at your mercy at all times. I was okay with that, because I just knew you’d never misuse the authority you have over me. But you did, like it was no big deal. You looked at me and wielded that power like a sword, slicing away my choice in the matter. I do understand why you did it, but I don't understand how you could do it like that, and it hurts me you find it so necessary and easy to use that sword against me. It shakes my confidence and my faith in our relationship.”
Panic bubbled in his stomach, quickly rising to his chest, and he pulled her around, holding her against him so she couldn't roll away. “No, Layla. Please don't say those things. I’ll never tear you down. Ever. Your opinion means everything to me. You mean everything to me, and I hated using our relationship against you.”
Tears slipped from her lids as she attempted to move away from him, but he held tight. “Just let me go, Quin.”
“No.”
“I need time.”
“Take your time, but I'm not letting go.”
“Damn it, Quin. You're not the boss of me.”
“You're absolutely right.”
She stopped struggling, but she stayed rigid as she looked him in the eye. “Let – go.”
He solidly met her stare, his heart in his throat. “No.”
Her anger wavered, exposing her sorrow, and her lashes fell as her body shook. “Why won't you let me be?”
“Because I'm selfish and I need you. Be as angry as you want with me, Layla. You're welcome to scream and kick and curse, but I'm not letting go. I hate the way I've made you feel, and if I walk out of here, I'll go crazy. So be mad, but please don't put me through that.”
She sobbed, and he pressed his lips to hers. “Please, love, I know you're mad, but I need you.”
Her flexed muscles finally relaxed, and he quickly curled her into a ball and moved her to his chest. Once she was tucked in, he firmly wrapped his arms around her body and buried his face in her hair, kissing between deep breaths.
Layla had surrendered yet again, but it wasn't like the time before. Yes, she still felt weak, but the shame of subservience wasn't there with this concession. Before, he'd sternly told her exactly how it would be while making it clear she had no choice, but this time, his demands came with heartfelt pleas and loving caresses. “Damn it, Quin. I have no leverage, and I don't like the way it feels.”