Resisting Ryder(13)

Ryder was fiddling with the DVD player and figuring out the various remotes. Minutes later, the movie started, and he plopped down next to Stormy. As they sat a safe distance apart, Stormy couldn’t help but feel some sort of magnetic pull towards him that she couldn’t explain. While they sat together in the dimly lit living room that late afternoon, she wished more than anything that he would just hold her. Nothing more, nothing less, and no meaning attached to it. She just wanted to be held.

“What movie did you pick?” she asked. She was sure, though, that it wouldn’t matter. Most of the movies were Jett’s.

“Clear and Present Danger,” he said. “Random, I know.”

“Not random at all,” Stormy smiled. “Jett loved that one.”

Ryder smiled and gave her a pitiful look.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I talk about him too much, don’t I?”

“Stormy, don’t apologize for that,” he said, almost insulted. “He was your husband. You loved him. His passing was sudden and unexpected. It’s not even been a week. Talk about him as much as you need. It’d be weird if you didn’t.”

Ryder totally understood, and all guilt associated with obsessing about Jett and missing him and talking about him dissipated into thin air. She relaxed back into the couch, under the fuzzy blanket, and took a deep breath.

The movie played on, but Stormy didn’t pay much attention to it. She just tried to focus on being in that moment. It was all she had after all. Yesterday was gone. Tomorrow didn’t exist yet. All she had was that moment, on the couch, watching a movie with Jett’s brother.

A couple hours later the credits rolled across the screen as Ryder stood up and stretched. It was growing darker outside as the sun began to fade into the horizon, and he would be going to bed in the next hour or so. He grabbed the remote off the table and clicked the T.V. off.

Stormy threw the blanket off her lap and stood up to stretch her legs and walk around for a bit. She knew her time with Ryder was coming to an end and there was nothing she could do about it.

“So what now?” he asked.

“Is there anything else you want to do? It’s almost seven,” Stormy replied.

“Would it be okay if we went to the cemetery?” Ryder asked, though he seemed afraid of her response. “I don’t want to upset you, but I feel like I need to pay my last respects before I leave town. I can go alone if you want.”

“Absolutely,” Stormy replied. “You’d have to drive though. It’s across from your mom’s house. She knows my car and would flip out if she saw me anywhere near her street.”

Ryder shook his head. “So wrong. I’m sorry you’re treated that way. All you ever did was love Jett. You have every right to visit him as much as you want.”

She took a seat on the edge of the couch. “It’s just his body. I have his memories, his love, his spirit. I feel like he’ll always be with me.”

“That’s a beautiful attitude,” Ryder said. “Don’t ever lose that.”

Stormy was surprised that she wasn’t in tears. It was one of the first times that week she could talk about him, really talk about him, without bawling. She felt a little numb on the inside and a little dried up, but on the other hand she felt the tiniest glimmer of hope for her future. It meant the world to her to have Ryder on her side and in her life.

“You’re his spouse, shouldn’t you have had the say over where he was buried?” Ryder asked. “Why do you just let Misty run the show?”

“I don’t know,” she said. “I guess I was just in shock. Plus Misty paid for the funeral, the burial, the headstone. I don’t have any money. I couldn’t expect them to pay for everything and then tell them where to put him.”

“You need to not be so afraid of her,” he said. “She’s just a person, like you and me.”

“Yeah, a person who would love nothing more to hold things over my head,” Stormy remarked. “She paid for the funeral, but I’m sure she’ll come knocking one of these days asking for something in return.”

“I think you should contact her,” he said. “When you’re ready of course. Tell her you want to bury the hatchet and move on.”

“Easier said than done,” she scoffed. Her hands began to visibly tremble at the thought of interacting with Misty. Misty terrified her. She was crazy and there probably wasn’t a whole lot she wouldn’t do to get what she wanted. She just wanted that chapter of her life to end. She wanted no more reasons for Misty to meddle. “Anyway, let’s not talk about Misty anymore.”