He raises his eyebrow, looking surprised.
“And also,” I say, sliding him my essay. “From here on out, for every insult you throw my way, I’ll be increasing my hourly fee.”
“I can afford it.” He laughs, but then he gets serious. “Do you think I should start with personification?”
“No, I think you should start really simple. Just free write and we can worry about the structure at the end.”
“Okay, done deal.” He picks up his pen and starts to write.
To my surprise, he doesn’t say anything else sarcastic for the rest of the session, and before I know it, our two hours have come to an end and we’re packing up our things.
“I can give you a ride home,” he offers as we walk toward the parking lot.
“No, thank you. I’ve had more than enough ‘Dean’ for today.”
“But what if I haven’t had enough Mia?” His eyes meet mine as his lips curve into a smile. “What if I want a little more?”
“Goodbye, Dean.” I power walk to my stop, thanking the bus gods that I make it two minutes before departure.
***
The next afternoon, a heavy rain is pounding hard against our small city, so I find myself trapped in the school’s cafeteria. The outdoor bench where I usually eat, is blocked off for the day, so I have the “pleasure” of sitting in the massive cafeteria where everyone else is.
I wish I could say that our high school is nothing like those B-grade teenage movies, and that everyone gets along. But no, Central High School is just as predictable as Dean Collins. In the center of the room are the quintessential popular students; athletes, varsity cheerleaders and beautiful people. In one corner of the room is where the social outcasts all convene, no matter their background: band geeks, academic club members, and foreign exchange students. In the opposite corner of the room are the slackers; the students that miss more days than they attend, and spend most of their time in detention for skipping or sneaking illegal smokes in the bathrooms.
Unlike most other schools in small towns, though, Central High is like the Taj Mahal of high schools. With our state of the art library that’s four stories high, our Olympic-sized swimming facility that includes a sauna and steam room for our award winning swim team, and our multi-vendor cafeteria that features a knock-off Starbucks and buffet bar, Central High’s offerings are second to none in any of the surrounding counties.
“So, how was tutoring with Mr. Popular, yesterday?” My best friend, Autumn, takes a seat across from me and passes me a cup of coffee.
“Now you want to know?” I take a slow sip. “I tried to tell you about it yesterday, but you didn’t pick up the phone.”
“I have a boyfriend, Mia.”
“So? What does that mean?”
“It means that if you call me past a certain hour, then I’m probably on the phone with him.” She smiles.
I roll my eyes. Autumn hasn’t been the same since she “proudly” lost her virginity eight months ago. Although she’s still the most amazing friend I’ve ever had, and we’re almost polar opposites when it comes to social events, I’m hoping her current obsession with all things sex and romance will soon come to an end.
“Well, he was actually an hour late,” I say. “But I think he might have a brain somewhere in there. I guess.”
“What about his cock?”
“What?” I nearly scream, but then I quickly lower my voice. “Who are you right now, Autumn? Who are you?”
She laughs and lowers her voice, too. “Tell me, Mia...How big was it?”
“I don’t know. How exactly would I know something like that? And don’t you have a boyfriend?”
“I do, but I also have fantasies. You’re telling me that you didn’t look?”
“No, I didn’t look! I have no reason to.”
“You have to look, Mia. If not for yourself, do it for me.” She fans herself. “It would be torture for him to be born so hot and not have the matching goods to go with it, wouldn’t it?”
I shake my head, in utter disbelief at her right now.
“So, you’ll look next time, right?” she asks.
“No.” I scoff. “Can we please not talk about Dean’s penis?
“What about Dean’s penis?” he asks, suddenly stopping right in front of us.
Words stall at my lips and I can’t get a single one to fall out. I just stare at him, along with Autumn.
No guy should be allowed to be that attractive...It’s just not fair...
“Nothing.” I get it together within seconds. “No one is talking about your ‘penis’.” I insist. “Do you really think either of us would say that?”