“How terrible! Did you tell Kenneth about it?” Brenna whispered.
“Nay, Kenneth has no feelings for me, he would say it was Laird Comming’s right since we were to be married. Do you understand my dilemma? What say you now?” She swiped at her tears with her sleeve.
“I say it answers many of the questions I have. But I have no experience in this, so I don’t know how to help you. Surely there must be someone who can. Mayhap we should talk to my brother, Alex.”
“Nay! I would be too embarrassed to discuss this with your brother. Please do not ask me to, Brenna. I will decide on my own what to do. Mayhap when Father MacGregor visits again, I will discuss entering the convent with him. I would enjoy working with the orphans.”
Brenna sighed before biting her lip. “I will go along with you as long as you promise no’ to make up your mind for at least a fortnight. You have been through too much.” Brenna rubbed Maddie’s arm. “Is there any chance you could be carrying Niles’ bairn?”
Maddie could feel her cheeks blushing as she stared at the ground. “Nay, I have had my courses since then.”
“Please remember what I said, you are always welcome to stay with us.” Brenna helped Maddie up from the bench and gave her a quick hug.
“Thank you, Brenna. I owe you and your family so much.”
“I think we have done enough for today. I will pick some fresh herbs for Cook and return to the keep.”
“If you don’t mind, I would like to be alone for a bit before returning,” Maddie wiped the tears from her face as she straightened her skirts.
“Of course, I will see you back in the hall.”
Maddie strolled down the main path away from the keep. She stopped briefly to take in the crisp fall air and to regain her composure, wiping the tears from her face. As she glanced around the bailey, she noticed something very different from her own home. Everyone was happy. She often received waves from people, even the blacksmith, or the men at the alehouse. She returned their waves with a smile.
Alex must be a very good laird. The people respected him and they were respectful to her. Their crofts and cottages were in good shape, not in need of repair like many at her home. Food was bountiful at his table, though not rich, but they shared willingly and many of his people were fed in the great hall.
She thought of how things had changed at her own home since her parents’ death. The hall had always been spotless when her mother was alive. Now it was filthy, regardless of her efforts. The guards could do as they wished and Kenneth had scared away many of the servants. Maddie never had enough help. Although some had quit and left the keep, he had sent many away because he was so demanding and they could not manage his whims. He would beat the help for the slightest offense. No wonder they appeared frightened and unhappy. Alex’s keep told a different story. She had noticed many of the Grant servants actually smiling while they worked. She had yet to see Alex raise a hand to anyone.
All the outer buildings here were well maintained and clean. The ones at Kenneth’s keep begged for attention and repair. Kenneth had not done much since her father had passed. Many of the buildings were dirty, garbage thrown everywhere. Kenneth even allowed his men to throw their food scraps on the rushes in the hall when they finished eating. He considered it Maddie’s job to clean it up. But with so many dogs pushing around for food, it was almost impossible to keep clean. No dogs were allowed in the food area of the great hall at the Grant Castle. Brenna kept her rushes clean with herbs and dried flowers mixed in to maintain their freshness.
Walking down the hill, she gazed toward the yards and quickly picked Alex out of the group of men. She sighed when she saw him, feeling a bit wistful of what could never be. As if on cue, he turned and found her gaze. She wanted to give him a quick wave, but decided he probably would get angry with her for interrupting his work. She strolled on to the stables to visit the horses. They reminded her of Mac. The stables had always been a place of comfort for her at her home. She hoped she would feel the same here.
***
Alex was in the middle of instructing one of his soldiers when heat moved along the back of his neck. Madeline must be nearby, though he had not seen her for days. How could she affect him so? Searching the area, he caught her gaze before she turned away. Anger and hurt both crept in. Why did she always turn from him?
“Chief, is this what you were talking about? I know what you mean now, isn’t this right?” The Grant warrior held his sword in a different stance in front of Alex.
Alex turned and stared at his man, what was he babbling about? He dismissed him with a wave and turned back around to follow Maddie. He couldn’t find her anywhere. An unusual tightness built in his chest while he searched for the sight of her in the bailey.