“I would appreciate that. Thank you.” Maddie nodded, forcing a smile.
Maddie glanced at her friend, fighting back tears, determined not to cry in front of her. How did she get to this point? Now she was dependent on people not of her clan. They would be feeding her, clothing her. She would take up a chamber in a place she didn’t really belong. How she hated her stepbrother for putting her in this situation.
What was she to do with her life now? She had no other relatives, at least, not to her knowledge. She had no dowry, and she had lost her maidenhead to the Comming. Who would marry her? Her life was in a shambles and she had nowhere to turn. She reminded herself of one of her mother’s sayings, to worry about the little steps, not the big ones.
She decided that would be her goal for today, to focus on the little steps, not the big ones like Alexander Grant.
CHAPTER NINE
A warm fall breeze blew their skirts in the air as Brenna and Maddie stepped outside. Maddie giggled, grabbing her skirts before they reached the tops of her knees. Jennie laughed with her, skipping along beside her with the dogs at her heels. Maddie noted the pride in Brenna’s eyes as they made their way through the herb garden. She caught the faint aromas of parsley and basil as the wind whipped around them.
They strolled on to the vegetable garden. Maddie’s eyes feasted in the plethora of purples, golds and oranges in neat rows, but the best part of this garden was the view. Gazing at the rippling surface of the loch, she could almost hear the distant lapping of the water on the banks. Maddie turned her face to the sky to take in the winds, sighing as the sun warmed her cheeks. She smiled, brushing a strand of hair away from her face, reminded of some of the most beautiful gifts the lord offered daily. Perhaps the quiet of a convent would indeed be right for her.
She beamed at Brenna, “This must be your favorite place with such a beautiful view of your lands.”
“’Tis no’ my favorite place, Maddie,” Jennie remarked. “My sister makes me work hard in the dirt sometimes. I don’t like it. I would prefer to play with my dogs.”
Laughing at the child’s honesty, Maddie ran her fingers through Jennie’s dark curls. “I think you have hair just like your brother’s.” Her brow furrowed, wondering where that thought had come from. She certainly was not purposefully thinking of Alex.
Brenna guided her to the chapel. Maddie approached the inside carefully as if opening a special package. Her eyes teared as she took in the details of the lovely woodwork. She ran her fingers along the smooth carvings with reverence, reminded of the chapel Kenneth had turned into another armory. How she missed the beauty of prayerful silence.
“Brenna, do you have a priest that lives here?” She loved the sound of her voice resonating in the open space.
“Nay, we have a traveling priest, Father MacGregor. He is a wonderful priest, but he has several places in the Highlands he likes to visit. He is due to visit again soon.”
“Father MacGregor! Oh, how wonderful!” Maddie could not help but clasp her hands together in excitement. “I have not seen him since my parents’ death. He used to visit us as well, but suddenly stopped. I thought mayhap it was due to bad health. But he is in good health?”
“Aye, he was fine the last time we saw him.”
“You will not mind if I visit the chapel on my own?”
“Of course not. You may use it whenever you like,” Brenna opened the heavy door for Maddie and they headed back into the sunlight.
Brenna pointed out many of the buildings as they strolled through the bailey, including the storehouses, the buttery, and the blacksmith. Madeline was introduced to many of the clan. She had to admit she enjoyed meeting them. Friendly and helpful, no one appeared threatening to her. The hard work of clan Grant was evident in everything she observed. She was reminded of her own small clan before her da had passed.
Moving on to the armory, Maddie’s discomfort from her ribs and her back grew. She sighed as she realized she would be suffering through another healing challenge. Quietly praying, she begged the lord for the strength to endure her tribulations without complaint. This usually helped her to continue in silence, often combined with thoughts of her da’s warmth enfolding her or her mother’s calm presence.
“Maddie, would you like to return to the castle? Mayhap you should rest a bit? Is your back paining you?”
“Nay, I am fine. I am used to working after my beatings. What about you, don’t you continue after Alex disciplines you?” Maddie raised her eyes innocently to Brenna’s.
She jumped at Brenna’s sharp intake of breath.