It took a while for me to find the spot, but in the end I remembered where it was. I stood before it solemnly and bowed my head.
“Hi guys,” I said quietly. “It’s been a while.”
My eyes shot back and forth between the headstones of my parents. They had bought these plots next to each other before they divorced, and with the sudden nature of their deaths that never got changed. I thought it was fitting. Even though they couldn’t be next to each other in life, at least they lay beside each other in death. I wished yet again they had never gotten divorced.
Shuddering, I took a deep breath. “I’m okay,” I told them. “I want you guys to know that. Life has been really hard without you, but I’m okay.”
A hand rested on my shoulder. I turned to Hunter, who was standing by my side, even if he needed crutches. It had been three months since his last MS attack, and he had exceeded all expectations in physical therapy. The doctors were confident he would be walking without crutches again. Maybe even in the next few weeks.
I turned to him and he smiled, giving my shoulder a tight squeeze. I smiled back at him before turning back to my parents’ graves.
“For the longest time I was trying to recover. Trying to get back to normal. But that’s never going to happen for me, really. What happened to you guys is just part of my life now. It took me a long time, but I realized I can still be happy.”
Tears began to fall from my face, but I wasn’t ashamed of them. Some things were worth crying about. I paused to dab at my eyes with my sleeve.
“I miss both of you guys so much. If you were alive, I know we could find happiness in our own way. Even after the divorce. We would have made it work. I know it.”
I pressed my lips together and wiped my eyes again.
“But you’re not here. So I’m finally finding another way to be happy, like I know you would have wanted. Even when you got divorced, I never doubted you both loved me and wanted me to have the best. And I found him.”
I put my hand over the hand Hunter had on my shoulder and smiled at him.
“I know both of you would like him,” I said.
When I thought of my father’s expression if he were to ever meet Hunter, a laugh bubbled up in my chest. He had always been so hyper-focused and business-like. I knew he would come around on Hunter, but his first impression probably wouldn’t have been the best. “Even you, Daddy.”
I chanced a glance over at Hunter. He cleared his throat. “I’ll take care of her,” he said solemnly. He readjusted his crutches and put an arm around me.
Leaning into him, I turned back to the headstones. “I love you both. I hope wherever you are, you’re at peace.”
I put my head down for a moment of silence. Hunter followed suit, and we stood there together, paying our respects to my parents. So much had happened since my father took his life. Since I’d met Hunter. Since I’d left Arrowhart. My life had turned on its head more times than I could count, but I’d pulled through. It was mostly because I’d had Hunter by my side.
After a moment of silence, I kissed him on the cheek. “Thanks for coming here with me. Let’s get back to the car.”
We walked, or swung on crutches, or whatever, back to the car. Side by side.