Before Jen left I promised her we would come over to her and Bubba’s house for lunch tomorrow. A small shudder went down my spine knowing I was going to let others see me looking like this. I know each and every one of them saw me in the hospital before I woke up, but I have no recollection of them being there at all. They have all accepted Sierra and me into their world. I am blessed to have friends and family like that.
Adam promised Sierra pizza tonight, so while we are getting all of the ingredients out I can’t help but laugh as Shayne and Shelby argue about who makes the better pizza. Everything was great until I found Adam beating the shit out of his punching bag. I flashed back to a few weeks ago when I caught him doing the very same thing when he was upset about me not giving into my feelings, but as I stood there and watched him I could tell this ran way deeper. He’s angry and he’s full of sorrow. I could see it written all over his handsome face. He jumped when I called out to him and when I came close to him, the pain I saw etched on his face nearly broke my heart.
When he admitted to me how this whole situation was tearing him up inside, I mentally chewed myself out because I can’t imagine what he is going through. He has comforted me so much in the last two days. Believe it or not, I am fine and I am going to be fine, but the man standing before me is breaking and I have no clue how to fix him. He seemed to quickly get back to himself after we talked, but I know you can’t just push that type of pain away. It will eat you alive if you do, so when Sierra hollers “Daddy!” from the top of the stairs and breaks our kiss apart, I lock what I was going to say away as I try to come up with some sort of tactical plan to help Adam fight his guilt and anger.
Leaving me breathless, he turns and walks to the bottom of the stairs.
“We’re down here, Butterfly,” he calls, slanting his head down as if to let Sierra see him.
“I gave Uncle Luke that bag of stuff for him and Lucy to make the same present for Aunt Shayne like you asked me to,” she says, coming down the stairs.
“Thanks for remembering. Now get over here and give me a hug.”
She runs straight into his arms and that feeling settles back not only in my stomach, but also in my heart. There is no doubt Adam loves my daughter.
************
“I’ll get it!” Sierra yells from the living room as the doorbell rings.
“Sierra, no!” I raise my voice a little too loud and tears start to form in her eyes. “I’m sorry, honey,” I say soothingly as I scoop her up in my arms. “It’s just you never answer the door without seeing who is it first, okay?”
She sniffles and shakes her head ‘yes’ as she lays her head on my shoulder.
“Who is it?” I ask as I look through the side glass window. Even though I can see it’s Antonio, I still want Sierra to know to never answer the door without asking.
“It’s Antonio.”
I set Sierra down and nod my head that it’s okay for her to open the door.
“Hey, munchkin.” He bends down and places a kiss on her cheek.
“Antonio. You’re just in time for dinner. We’re having pizza tonight,” I greet him.
“Yum. Pizza, my favorite.” He stands and he makes his way into the house and shuts the door behind him.
“Do you want to have dinner with us, Antonio?” Sierra fondly asks.
“I would love to have dinner with you, Sierra. But actually, I wanted to talk to your Aunt. Is she here?”
“Yup. She’s downstairs. I’ll get her.”
“Thanks, kiddo.”
As soon as Sierra is out of sight, Antonio lets out a deep sigh and brings his hand up to run it through his hair.
“You like her, don’t you?”
His eyes widen at my blunt question.
“So she’s told you everything, I see. And yes, I do like her. There is something about her that makes her so different from any other woman I have ever met and frankly it scares the fucking shit out of me.”
I think we are both a little startled about how honest he just was. I avert my eyes in the direction of the stairs to make sure Shelby isn’t coming up yet.
“I will deny this if you ever tell her, but she likes you, too. Frankly, it is scaring the shit out of her as well.”
“You have got to be fucking kidding me! She sure as hell doesn’t act like she does. Your sister busts my balls every chance she gets, and here I am coming back for more.”
“See, that is why I think the two of you would make such a great couple. You both have such lovely ways with words, Antonio.”
“Yeah, well, when I want something I go after it. I am not giving up on your sister and if she doesn’t get her ass up here like, now, I am going to go down there after her.”