Rescue Me(42)

“One night Joel came home extremely drunk. How he even drove home, I have no clue. Sierra was sound asleep, thank God. I was just sitting on the couch reading and I have no idea what set him off but he went ballistic. He started hitting me, then threw me down on the floor where he continued punching and kicking me. I think he may have broken a few ribs that day but I was too scared of him to go to the hospital for fear he would take Sierra. You see, he always threatened to take her if I ever told anyone about the things he did. I was so naïve. I didn’t know anything. I believed he would take her and I would never see her again.” I pause as Adam tenses behind me. “He raped me that night.”

Adam takes in a sharp breath. I lay my hands on his legs to try and comfort him as much as I can. He goes to speak but I give his leg a tight squeeze as if to signal to let me finish.

“It took all the love I have for my daughter for me to keep going because all I wanted to do was die as I laid there after he got up and went to bed. I laid on that floor for hours, Adam. I just couldn’t seem to get myself up. I felt so dirty. I couldn’t believe my own husband had just done that to me.”

“Fuck! I want to kill him for even laying his hands on you. And to think you went through all of this on your own.” The tone of Adam’s voice is furious yet compassionate.

“I wasn’t alone. I knew I could get up and go get Shayne and Sierra and I could have left right then and there, but instead I showered and cleaned myself up the best I could. For days I couldn’t get the smell of him off me. I hid myself away inside the house. The worst part is that a couple of days later, he came home hung over yet again and he... he hit Sierra.”

Adam slams his fist against the side of the tub. “That fucking son of a bitch! Fuck! How dare he even lay a finger on that precious girl?”

“It was horrible. I felt as if I had failed her as a mother, and I had. The thing is, I don’t know if I would have left Joel for raping me. I might have stayed even after that, if only he hadn’t put his hands on my daughter. That same day, Shayne came knocking on the door because I wouldn’t answer my phone. I told her what happened and she begged me to get the hell out of there. So we planned my escape. The next night Joel came home drunk again and slapped me around a little more, but this time Shayne was waiting for him and we called the police.” I exhale and wait for Adam’s reaction.

“Did you tell the police about him raping you, or about what he did to Sierra?”

“No. And that is my biggest regret. The only ones who know are Shayne and Shelby, and they both tried to convince me to tell the police, but Adam, I just wanted to be done with him and never see him again. I don’t think anyone ever understands unless they have gone through something like that themselves. I may be a coward because I didn’t press charges, but he lost everything because of what he did. He lost his job and his parents and brother were angered at what he had done. I have no clue if they made peace with him or not. He took off and no one has heard from him until the phone call I got the other day.”

“I don’t know what to say to this except, you are the strongest woman I have ever met. You made it. It makes me want to kill the son of a bitch for hurting the two of you.”

I turn my body completely around to straddle him, not in a sexual way because that is not what either of us needs right now. I do it to look in his beautiful eyes to let him know I really am all right.

“I am okay, I really am, and I owe it all to you. You see, I never thought I was worthy of being loved or having anyone love me back. And even though this isn’t the way I wanted to tell you, I need you to know that I am deeply and absolutely head over heels in love with you. No matter what Joel’s reasons are for being here, I will not let him destroy me again. I will fight him this time with everything I have, not only for me, but for Sierra and for you, too.”

Adam lifts both of his hands and cups my face, softly running his thumb over my bottom lip.

“Do you realize what you just told me tonight proves to me and to yourself just how strong of a woman you really are?”

I simply nod because for the first time in years I feel strong, and as I sit in this tub staring at the man who I just confessed my love to, I vow I will take my last breath before I ever let Joel take that away from me again.





Chapter Fifteen

Adam



Holy shit, Erin’s story about Joel has me raging inside. And then she flips and tells me she loves me. She examines me so tenderly, and I know she is waiting for some kind of response from me. I have never been in love before, but I do know I love Erin.