Reluctantly Royal(65)
“I think you’ve done more than enough for this family.” I lowered my eyes and looked at my shoes. There was a small scuff on the left toe where a member of parliament had accidentally stepped on me.
“It’s been my pleasure.” His voice had lost its teasing quality and taken a turn for the serious. “And I’ll be here to help as long as you need me.”
What if that’s forever? The question came unbidden to my mind. Silently I berated myself. I couldn’t keep Max. I couldn’t, even though I was really starting to want to. Not just because of the way he made me feel, but because of the way he looked at Marty. There was love in his gaze when he looked at my son, kindness and amusement.
Looking out the window, I tried to focus on the tasks at hand. Now wasn’t the time to think about Max. Was it? Maybe it was natural that my mind sought something happier to fixate on. Was that all this was with Max?
I surreptitiously glanced in his direction. Had I slept with him just because I had needed something good? As I watched him talk to Marty and open a package of crackers for him, I knew it had been more than that. Max had infiltrated our family bubble, our lives . . . my heart.
I never would have imagined that I would fall for a prince who hated the limelight. Hell, I’d given up on love all together. I hadn’t been sure it actually existed. But here I was in the middle of it, completely confused by how I had gotten there.
And now I didn’t know what to do.
In the limo on the way to entomb my grandfather in an old family plot, I’d realized that I had fallen in love with a man, completely my opposite, in only a matter of days.
So I did what any sane person would do in a situation like that. I laughed.
Loudly. Until I started snorting, which made me laugh even more.
“Does she do this often?” Max asked Marty.
“Sometimes,” Marty replied. “She doesn’t usually make that weird pig noise though.”
I’d started to tear up I was laughing so hard. I was in love. Love. Me. In love. Jesus, no wonder I hadn’t kissed anyone in years. Apparently a good smack-a-roo was all it took to win my heart.
And I was in love with someone who would hate everything about the life I was trying to build. Living the life I wanted to live would be a type of torture for Max. I was in love. And I was completely stupid.
“Are you okay?” Max leaned forward and touched my knee.
“I—I am.” I covered my mouth and tried to rein myself in. If anyone saw me right now they would think I was insane. Which is probably what Max was wondering right that minute.
“Do you need anything?” He looked at me with worried eyes, but didn’t take his hand from my knee.
“I’m sorry. I’m fine. I just realized something.” I wiped at my cheeks and tried to shrug it off. Could I make it work? Could we make it work? Would he even want to try?
“Must’ve been funny.” He raised his eyebrows and grinned.
“Not really.” I shook my head. There was nothing funny about being in love. The last time I’d fallen in love, I’d ended up with a baby and a broken heart.
The look on his face made me giggle again. I guess my brain just refused to handle any more stress or hurt. How could I convince him that we could make it work? I kept Marty out of the spotlight. Surely I could keep a boyfriend from being overwhelmed, right?
“Maybe you’ll tell me someday.” He reached out and tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.
“Maybe I will.” That calmed my giggles. Would I, could I tell him that I was in love with him? Would that send him running for the hills? The thought almost made me feel nauseous. My eyes traveled over Max’s face, taking in the darker eyebrows, bright green eyes, and strong jaw. He might be an artist, but he was a work of art himself. He shifted from the seat across from me so that he was sitting next to me.
He watched my face, trying to decipher what I was thinking. The thumb of the hand on my knee rubbed gently, causing goose bumps to erupt over my skin.
“Are you being mushy?” Marty’s voice broke our staring contest.
“What?” My pulse quickened, and for a minute I felt like a girl caught by her parents.
“You look all gooey.” He made a kissing face and I felt my eyes widen.
“Would that be okay?” Max asked.
My heart sped up and I started to speak but Marty beat me to it.
“I guess.” He shrugged. “Can we still play video games?”
“You’re not tired of losing to me?” Max laughed.
“I beat you twice last time!” Marty shook his head. “You need to practice.”
“That’s fine. I don’t mind you beating me a bunch more.” Max leaned back in the seat next to me and casually draped his arm along the seat. He looked at me with a calm expression and shrugged.