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Refuge(19)

By:Karen Lynch


His face gave nothing away as he nodded. “You have a cousin who lives here, but he is away at the moment. And your mother’s sire is here. You would call him your grandfather.”

“My grandfather is here?” When Nikolas told me that Madeline’s father was still alive and wanted to meet me, I was curious but nowhere near ready to meet him. The knowledge that my grandfather was at this stronghold right now filled me with trepidation and excitement at the same time.

“Would you like to meet him?” Lord Tristan asked.

My stomach twisted nervously. Was I ready to meet Madeline’s father? The man wasn’t Madeline and I could not hold her behavior against him, but was I ready to have him in my life? “No . . . I mean, I don’t know. I’m sorry, you took me by surprise and it’s a lot to take in.”

He settled back in his chair. “It’s understandable. This is a big adjustment for you and you need more time. He only wants you to know that he is here for you when you are ready to meet him.”

I lowered my gaze as guilt hit me. Great. Now I felt like a total jerk. My grandfather sounded like a nice guy, and I didn’t want to hurt his feelings. It wouldn’t hurt to just meet him, right? It wasn’t like we had to start having family dinners and all that. And how could I walk around here after this, knowing he was here and not be able to identify him?

“I’m ready,” I said at last.

“Are you sure?”

I raised my eyes to his again and nodded. “I’m a little nervous, but yes.”

Smiling, he stood and went to his desk. Instead of reaching for his phone as I had expected him to, he opened a drawer and pulled out a thin book. It wasn’t until he returned to the sitting area that I saw it was not a book, but a photo album. He passed the chair and sat beside me on the couch. I looked up into his eyes, and the tenderness I saw in them punched me square in the chest.

“You have been through so much, and I can see how unhappy you are right now. I can’t tell you how sorry I am for all the pain you’ve suffered. More than anything, I wish I could have been there for you all these years. Nikolas told me about your uncle and how much you care for each other, and I’m happy that you have someone like him in your life. I don’t want to replace him. All I ask is the chance to get to know you and that you will come to think of me as family, too.”

I struggled for words. What do you say when you find yourself face-to-face with a grandfather you never knew? Especially one who looks like he should be in college. “You’re Madeline’s father,” was all I could manage.

His eyes grew sad. Nikolas hadn’t told me much about Madeline or under what circumstances she had left the Mohiri, and I wondered what her relationship had been like with her father.

“I know Madeline hurt you deeply. My daughter has a lot to answer for when we find her.” He reached for my hand, and I let him take it despite my conflicting emotions. “When I learned of your existence, it took everything in me not to go to Maine myself. But Nikolas advised against it. He told me about your anger toward Madeline and your refusal to have anything to do with us. With everything else that was going on at the time, he was concerned about overwhelming you.”

I let out a tremulous laugh. “He was right. I kind of freaked out when he told me what I was. I’m still getting used to it all.”

He squeezed my hand lightly. “All I ask is for the chance for us to get to know each other.”

The hope shining in his eyes touched me, and I suddenly felt very shy. I nodded because I couldn’t trust myself to speak.

He let go of my hand, but he didn’t move away. “Why don’t we start slowly by getting to know each other a little better? Nikolas told me what he could of your life, but I would rather hear about it from you. I’m sure you must have questions for me as well.”

“Okay. Um, what should I call you?”

“We don’t use most of the familial terms humans do, so you can call me Tristan.”

“Not Lord?”

His smile grew. “That is my formal title, but everyone here calls me by my first name.”

I returned his smile, feeling a little more at ease. “I have to tell you it feels very weird to have a grandfather who looks a few years older than me.”

Tristan chuckled. “I can imagine.” He settled back against the couch. “Why don’t you tell me about yourself, if you want to, that is?”

I started with my early childhood. Tristan’s smile faded when I spoke of Madeline leaving us when I was two, but it returned when I described my dad and recounted the many ways he had made my life so full and happy. I told him about my dad’s love of books and his penchant for creating games to encourage my interest in reading and music and poetry.