I downed the bottle of water, threw it in the bin, and switched off the lights to head for bed. Tyler was worth every bit of fight I had left in me, and it certainly wasn’t anywhere near the fucking last round yet.
Chapter 7
Tyler
It was getting harder and harder to suppress my feelings for Dean. It was difficult, so fucking complex that it killed me inside. I wanted Dean so badly, it hurt and couldn’t be ignored.
It was also getting harder and harder to keep away from Jeremy. I missed him so much, but after what happened last night, I was determined not to expose him to his dad. He didn’t need a father like that in his life, so I needed to protect him.
Closing my eyes for a second, I opened them back up to look at myself in the mirror. It was seven o’clock the next evening and I was getting ready for my night out with Evan. He was picking me up in an hour and I still needed to pick an outfit. Sometimes, picking something to wear comes easily and other times, it seems so fucking hard for some reason. Tonight was one of the hard nights. Nothing in my wardrobe looked right when I tried it on.
I was about to change yet another outfit when I heard my phone ringing. When I looked, I saw it was Tara and snapped my phone up. “Tara, where the fuck have you been? I’ve been trying to reach you all day. I’ve been worried sick.”
“I’m sorry, baby girl. I was busy with Jimmy and my battery ran out of power. I’ve only managed to get home and charge it back up now.”
I was a little bit angry, but calmer now that I knew she was safe. “What happened after you left?”
“Oh, my god, Tyler. I don’t know where the fuck this Jimmy came from, but wow. He’s like a fucking dream come true. When we left you, we jumped in a cab and went to Toni’s near me. We must have stayed there until four in the morning. All we did was talk, and it was easy, you know? We didn’t have to sit there and think about what to say next. The conversation just came naturally. He was sweet, he was funny, he was kind, and he didn’t once try to cop a feel or make some rude remark. He was the perfect gentleman.”
She was gushing. It was actually kind of sweet. It made my anger disappear completely. “So you didn’t sleep with him?”
“Oh, I slept with him. Did you not see him? Damn!”
We both started giggling. “I take it you had a good time then?” I was hinting and I knew she could tell.
“It was the best sex I’ve ever had. And his tongue—”
I put my finger in my ear. “La, la, la, la, la, la, la.”
I heard her giggling. “Okay, I’ll stop.”
I laughed. “Thank you.” I paused a moment, then said, “Are you going to see him again?”
“Oh, yes,” she purred. “Tonight, in fact.”
I smiled. “That’s great. Have a great time.”
“Thanks. Are you still going out with Evan tonight?”
I sighed. “Yes. It just seems so hard now. I can’t put my finger on it.”
Tara went silent for a moment. “Having Dean here must be confusing as hell. I wouldn’t be too hard on yourself. Jimmy told me some stuff about Dean last night. Despite some of his misgivings, he seems like a great guy. I can totally understand how hard this must be for you. Maybe you just need to tell Evan that you need some time away.”
I closed my eyes. “Possibly. I don’t know.”
“Maybe tonight might help you make a decision.” She paused for a moment. “Listen, I can’t tell you what it is you need to do, but whatever your decision, I will stand by you. And I mean that.”
My eyes welled up a little. “Thank you, Tara. That means the world to me. You’re a true friend.” I wanted to believe that I could trust Tara, but it was hard. I loved her, but I had never truly given into her friendship with all my heart. I really wanted to, but it was just so damn hard.
“I know people have let you down before, but I never will. I promise you that.”
And just like that, she did it. She knew exactly what was on my mind and quelled it in one sentence.
“Thanks. And the same goes for me. Without question.”
“You’ve been through a lot, Jessica. You need to have people around you can rely on. Everybody does.” She sighed. “You know, it feels weird calling you Jessica when everyone else is calling you Tyler. Do you want me to call you Tyler? That is your actual name.”
I smiled. “No, it’s okay. You’ve known me as Jessica for the last four years now. That would be a difficult one to break.”
“Okay.”
I looked at my watch and saw that I had twenty-five minutes to get ready. “Listen, I have to go. Evan’s picking me up in less than a half-hour and I haven’t even picked a dress out yet.”