Someone knocked on her back door. Please don’t let somebody have an emergency tonight. She was almost to the door when the knocking came again. She realized she was wearing only an oversize T-shirt and her panties. “Give me just a minute,” she called out, and scurried to put on a pair of jeans. Then she came back and cracked open the door just enough to see who was there.
“Holly?” It was Chance.
Had he come to say goodbye? He must have really wanted her to know he was leaving to show up in person at midnight.
“I know you’re leaving,” she whispered through the crack in the door. “You didn’t have to stop by and tell me in person, but thank you. And I can never thank you enough for saving Emma. Please take care of yourself. Okay?”
A strong gust of wind brought the rain slamming against her house. The tears returned about the same time.
“Holly, let me in.”
“No. Chance, you need to go.” Yes, she wanted to be in his arms again. But she didn’t want to prolong the goodbye.
“I’m not leaving until I make sure you’re all right. Until we’ve had a chance to talk.” She heard the determination in his voice and knew he would stand outside in the rain with lightning crackling overhead all night if that was what it took.
With both hands she wiped the moisture from her cheeks and stepped back into the room, letting the door fall open.
Chance stepped inside and closed the door behind him. His eyes were on her face. On the tears that refused to stop falling. “Holly, don’t do this.”
She turned away from him. “If you don’t have an animal emergency...”
He put his hands on her shoulders and spun her around to face him. He should never have come back to the ranch. He’d told her he would call and that was what he should have done. He should never have made love to her knowing full well he would be leaving. He knew her heart. She lived life, she didn’t just walk on the edge of it. Small things that most people didn’t notice made Holly laugh for joy. But it worked the other way, too. Things that made others feel a little sad could rip a hole through her heart. She’d lost so much. He had a feeling that in her mind she was losing him, as well.
He loved her. He probably always had. But he couldn’t stay. What would he do if he left the military? He just couldn’t see himself wearing a suit to work every day and becoming a pencil pusher like his brothers. He was not cut out for that. If he tried to force it, Holly would pay the price by putting up with what she called a grouch.
“Are congratulations in order? Are you going to be reinstated?”
He hesitated, knowing the answer was not what she wanted to hear. “Yes. I leave in the morning to report to the naval base in Coronado.”
“Then definitely, congratulations. I’m very happy for you.”
She did her best to smile, but he could see the truth in her eyes.
“This, what we have, is not over, Holly. That’s why I came back. To tell you, in person, I want you in my life.”
She walked to a chair and leaned against the back of it as though she needed the support.
“And what, exactly, do we have, Chance? A childhood full of memories and making love in the rain?” She looked down to where her hands gripped the chair back. “We both know you don’t have to come all the way here for that sort of thing. In fact, I’m sure there are plenty of women who have vastly more experience than me who would love to take my place.”
He walked toward her. “Make no mistake, Holly. It’s you I want.” His voice was rough and low even to his own ears. “I want you in my arms, I want to kiss you like there’s no tomorrow. I want to bury myself inside you, as deep as I can go. Deeper. I want to tease you about riding English. I want to teach you how to swim. I want it all.” He stepped closer. “I want you to come with me. I want to marry you, Holly. Please say yes. I don’t know when I’ll be back.”
The tears swam in her eyes. “I can’t, Chance.”
“Why?”
“Let’s just say I know how to swim and leave it at that, okay?”
“No. We’re not leaving it there. I thought...I thought you loved me.”
“I do. With all my heart and soul. It would be my dream come true, but eventually reality comes knocking,” she said. “You have a team who counts on you, who cares about you. I have patients who need me. And of course, my number one priority is Emma. I’m all she has, Chance.”
“I’m not asking you to leave Emma.” He frowned, upset that she would ever think such a thing. “I would never do that.”
“Chance, please understand what I’m saying. She will never know her mother or father. But at least here, in Calico Springs, she will grow up in a community where they lived. She will meet people who knew them and loved them and she’ll hear good things. She’ll grow up proud she is Jason’s daughter. And they will love her as one of them. I won’t take that away from her. It’s all I have to give her.”
Chance looked into Holly’s eyes, and saw her determination to protect and do what was right for Emma clearly reflected there. He took her into his arms. He needed to hold her, to feel her next to him. He was a bit surprised when she made no effort to push away because clearly she was upset. He bent down and kissed the side of her face. She turned toward him, her lips seeking his. He could taste the salty remnants of her tears.
As always, her lips were so soft. Like the softest velvet he could imagine. As he kissed her he felt the stiffness leave her body, and her arms came around his neck. And she kissed him back as if this was the last time she would ever see him.
Eventually, they pulled apart.
“So I guess this is really it.”
“I guess so. We had a good time, didn’t we?” She crossed her arms around her as though giving herself some needed support. He could see the tears still falling down her face even as she tried to blink them away. It was so Holly. She’d always been so tough, so determined. Especially when it meant keeping up with her big brother and his friend Chance. Thank heavens that hadn’t changed.
“Holly, I keep thinking there is some sort of solution here. The money is there, but I’ve never been one who could sit on my hands. A few months with me underfoot, you really would be calling me a grouch. And...there’s something else you should know. Wade is selling the ranch, so prepare for some new neighbors.”
The shock on her face was immediate. “What? How can he do that?”
“He is the head of Masters Corporation. The corporation owns the land. He can do anything he wants.”
“But the ranch... It was the beginning of all of us. Jason, you, Wade, Cole. It’s where your mother is laid to rest. It should be yours. This is so wrong. I’m going over there and light into Wade Masters like...”
“No, Holly,” he said. “Wade is doing what he thinks is best. The ranch isn’t profitable, and it’s too big to try to support it. He will do right by you, Holly. Don’t hold it against him.” Chance looked around the room as though unsure what his next move should be. “Okay. Well, I’d better get going. I’ll be in touch, okay?”
“Sure. You take care and don’t get shot again, for gosh sakes.” Again she tried her best to smile.
There was nothing else to say. There was no use in prolonging her sadness. Or his.
With a nod to her, Chance turned and walked out the door.
He didn’t see Holly double over in pain. He didn’t hear the hopeless cries of anguish or her soft but broken voice saying, “I love you, Chance Masters. I always will.”
Thirteen
The combined sounds of announcements over the loudspeaker and the disgruntled mooing of cows told Holly the rodeo was well underway. A loud buzzer signaled the end of time for a wild bronc rider. Holly had grown up at these events and she never could quite understand why any man would put his life on the line if he didn’t have to. Who in their right mind would try to go eight seconds on a bull with three-foot-long horns and a really bad attitude? Her brother and Chance used to ride those bulls. She’d thought they were crazy then. She still thought it was insane. But she always admired the roping competitions and had won her share of ribbons for the barrel-racing event.
She walked toward the area that had been set up for her use. Next door, another tent, quite a bit larger, had been erected for the area doctor. She loved old Doc Hardy. It was easy to understand why this community refused to let him even think about retiring. He welcomed her with a hug.
“Let’s hope neither man nor horse gets injured tonight,” he said. “Are you here for both nights, Holly?”
“No, sir,” she said. “I’ve got it tonight. Kevin will be here tomorrow.”
“I like that young man. Seems like a hard worker. And his boys were in to see me for preschool inoculations and they are just as nice and respectful as their father. The mother, too.”
“I couldn’t agree more.”
Holly inventoried the medical equipment brought over by members of the Calico County Rodeo Association. As far as she could tell, everything was here. She shared the hope that neither she nor Doc Hardy had to use any of it. Her for the animals. Dr. Hardy for the people.