Recipe for Satisfacton(57)
She had no idea what kind of surprise Jack had in store for her, and when they parked a fair distance from a set of buildings, she became even more confused.
These weren’t just any old buildings, they were apartment buildings—more specifically, ones that she recognized as low-income units subsidized by the government for people on assistance.
“What are we doing here?” Night had fallen and their surroundings were illuminated by the streetlights overhead.
“This is where I came from.” He removed his helmet and put it between his stomach and the bike. She followed his lead.
Cars were parked in front of the building entrances, music blaring from inside. Kids played on a playground in the middle of the complex, laughing and just…being kids.
Where he came from? She didn’t understand. “You lived here?”
“I never knew who my dad was. I lived here with my mom and my grandmother. My grandmother raised me. My mom was too busy partying and doing drugs to pay attention.”
She didn’t pretend that the life of a foster child was easy, but she never thought the man she was with now could have ever endured such a horrible childhood.
“My grandmother died when I was ten and a week later, my mom dropped me off with Children’s Aid and never came back. Until…” He paused, taking a deep breath. This was intimate information. Even more intimate than his relationship with the kids from the program. And somehow, she didn’t think he divulged it to any of the random women he’d been known to date.
“You don’t have to tell me all this.”
“I know.” He turned his body around as best he could to look at her. “I want to tell you. I want someone in this world to know me. Not Jack the Madewood brother, but Jack who comes from the ghetto.”
Her heart swelled. Sterling nodded and leaned forward, wrapping her arms around him. She wanted him to know she cared. That for the next few minutes, he was safe.
“My mother showed up again when I was seventeen when she figured out Vivian had taken me in. She was still using. Still broken. I got her into rehab. She even finished the program. I lent her some cash to start a new future.”
Why did Sterling have the sinking feeling this story didn’t end with a happily ever after?
“I never saw her again. She took the check and ran.”
Her stomach churned. She knew exactly how he felt. Having the people who are supposed to love you unconditionally take advantage. They had both been betrayed. But he didn’t need to know about her trouble. He had enough on his plate.
“Vivian took me in when I was fourteen.” He paused, no doubt memories of the wonderful woman flashing in his mind. “I thought it was odd that a single woman with a shitload of money wanted a fourteen-year-old boy. What she wanted with four teenage boys.”
He probably wasn’t the only one with that question.
“We all treaded lightly, even Neil, Finn, and Cole, who had already been with Vivian for quite a few months. We knew she was the real deal when Neil turned eighteen and she asked him to stay even though he was officially out of the system. When Finn realized she wanted to keep us forever, he wanted to change his name. He wanted to be a Madewood. But she wouldn’t allow it.”
“Why was that?”
“She wanted us to keep our names, to remember who we were, where we came from. That no matter where the future may take us, our pasts—no matter how bleak—were a part of us and would shape us as men.”
“She was a smart woman.”
He nodded and held out his hand. “So this is where I came from. I don’t really remember much before I ended up in foster care. Not sure if that’s my brain trying to protect me from bad memories, or if I was just too young.”
“Probably a little of both.” Unfortunately, Sterling didn’t have that luxury. She remembered every infested apartment, every crappy car, every angry landlord banging on the front door. Still, she was relieved to know Jack had been spared so much of the grief she’d lived through as a teen.
“So every once in a while I drive out here and remind myself how lucky I am. How grateful I am that a woman like Vivian was brought into my life.”
“You are lucky.” She squeezed him tighter.
He leaned his head back and rested it on her shoulder. “Sometimes it feels like the cord tying me to the universe has been cut and I’m spinning out of control with no end in sight. I miss her so much.”
Those were heavy words for a man like him to utter. A man who had expectations put on him. Who had a legacy to contribute to.
She had no experience with death. Although she had wanted to off her parents on more than one occasion over the years, they were still very much alive…and bleeding her dry.