Rebel Princess(49)
Birds twittered, leaves rustled in the warm afternoon breeze, brightly colored insects swooped in and out of the g'zebo's shade. But the soulmate connection was silent. Had it snapped when she developed qualms about sharing Tal's bed in full view of staff who had known her since she was born?
Or not until she'd thrown him across the room into a chest of drawers?
Or maybe not until she'd run away instead of feeling empathy for his moment of weakness-which it was quite possible she had provoked?
Too late. Tal must be regretting he had ever met her, and as for herself, hindsight mocked, even as guilt consumed her. She should have told him . . .
Or perhaps Vaden was right. Tal had always known who she was . . . because his father had to know. The hardheaded admiral would never have produced a gilded prison in the Archives for a mere cadet. And in spite of Tal's assertion that he'd let his family believe him dead, Admiral Vander Rigel had a connection to the rebellion. Of that Kass was certain.
Which suggested . . .
Kass went completely still as an old idea suddenly blossomed into far more than she had ever considered before. Great goddess, was it possible? The Rigels were one of Regula Prime's great families. They could buy a small planet like Psyclid and have credits left over. Great wealth meant power and influence . . . and the possibility there were other powerful men on Regula Prime who might like to see an end to the present government.
Which-praise the goddess!-could mean the rebellion wasn't as small and isolated as she had thought. That S'sorrokan was the strong right arm of a much larger, secret cabal.
Kass pulled her feet up on the g'zebo's bench seat and wrapped her arms around her knees. Was she fantasizing again?
Tal had confessed to holding secrets of his own. So . . . could the rebellion really be more than just a small colony of determined souls on Blue Moon?
Personal problems fading before an onslaught of speculation, Kass sat perfectly still and let her mind soar. The possibilities were . . . breathtaking.
Sudden silence. Birdsong faltered, insects flitted away. Kass looked up to find Zee-Zee staring at her from the bottom of the g'zebo's broad steps.
Kass lost it. Until this moment she hadn't realized how much she missed talking to Zee-Zee on a daily basis. She thrust out a hand toward her friend, even as her eyes misted and tears spilled down her cheeks.
Zee-Zee charged up the steps. Instead of offering the hug Kass needed, her former roommate stood, arms akimbo, glaring down at her. "Pok, girl, looks like I just lost a bet. When Dorn told me you'd left the captain, I didn't believe it. Not after him mooning over you for so long. I mean, that man worships you! I swear, Kiolani, if you broke his heart, I just may take you over my knee."
Princesses didn't cry in public. Well, fyd that. Kass's tears went from free-flow to close to a bawl.
Belligerence fading, Zee-Zee slumped down on the bench next to Kass, studying her with a puzzled frown. "So it's mutual," she ventured. "You've hurt each other, and you're both too batani stubborn to give in."
A watery hiccup. Kass nodded.
"Care to share? It might make you feel better. And I admit I'm so curious I'm panting. I mean, you two were meant for each other. How did you mess it up so fast?"
Kass wiped her eyes. "I-" Oh, pok! How could she explain the scruples that kept her from sharing Tal's suite? Impossible without revealing her secret, and she could never tell Zee-Zee before she told Tal. Kass heaved a frustrated sigh. "I'm sorry, Zee. I have a good reason why I felt I couldn't live openly with Tal at Veranelle, but I'm not free to explain. I certainly never intended for us to break up, just to be . . . more discreet. Unfortunately-"
"He got the wrong message."
"Uh-huh."
"And you still haven't straightened it out?"
"I tried to. Last night." Avoiding any mention of secret passages, Kass admitted going to Tal's room and, finding him gone, waiting for him in his bed. "But I was asleep when he came back," she said. "This great weight fell on top of me. Only later did I realize he was abominably drunk. At the time I simply reacted to an attack. I tossed him hard against a wooden dresser before I realized it was Tal."
"Oh, fy-yd," Zee-Zee breathed.
"I made sure he wasn't badly hurt and then, like the worst kind of coward, I simply ran straight back to my room, and I haven't seen or heard from him since." Kass reached for her handkerchief as once again her tears began to flow.
"You're saying the great Tal Rigel was drunk?"
"If I'd lit a match, he would have breathed fire."
"But that's good, girl. That man's so uptight and righteous, I doubt he's had too much to drink since he was in the Academy. You got him going, set the great S'sorrokan on his ear. That's quite an accomplishment for a little bit of nothing like you. So quit feeling sorry for yourself. Sounds like nothing more a lovers' quarrel that got hung up on too much pride."
Kass's head came up, amber eyes shooting sparks. "I groveled! I was naked in his bed-"
Zee-Zee shrugged. "So it's his turn. But if he doesn't give in, you've got to remember he didn't get to be boss because he ever admitted he was wrong. About anything," she added with considerable emphasis.
Kass allowed a final tear to drip off her chin. She lifted her head, looking her much taller friend in the eye. "I think part of our problem is that we spent too much time together right after the battle. Adrenaline and passion, a volatile mix. By the time we got back to Blue Moon, we were overdue for a quarrel. Seeing you, talking with you, makes me realize how isolated I've been. I missed you, Zee. Don't let us go this long again without talking, all right?"
Zee-Zee offered a rueful smile. "Aye, girl, keep that up and the tears are going to be mine." She stood. "You coming to the common room for supper?"
Regretfully, Kass shook her head. "Afraid I'm not quite ready yet."
"Make it up with him, Kass. The two of you need each other." Zee-Zee squeezed Kass's hand and then she was gone, down the steps and onto the path back toward Veranelle.
Kass was left with irony of it all. Here sat the Psyclid Princess Royal, her heart on her sleeve, waiting for a summons that would never come. Pok! Tal probably wasn't even up yet. But if he was, Kass hoped he was suffering.
Pride. Pride, the tripstone of monarchs and fools. As the only free member of the Psyclid royal family, she was, technically speaking, the Psyclid government in exile, ruler of Blue Moon and everything on it. Including Reg rebels. Pride had smashed a krall into Liona Dann's face. Pride would not allow her subjects to see her as S'sorrokan's woman. Pride whispered this was her planet, her castle, the rebels mere guests on Psyclid soil.
So why did she hesitate to claim her power? Was it the influence of those anonymous years at the Academy, taking orders from everyone, or maybe the four years as a powerless prisoner in solitary confinement? At the Archives she had filled her mind with knowledge far beyond her wildest dreams, yet the lessons she remembered best were hurt, sorrow, rage, and a thirst for revenge.
And above all else, a hopeless fantasy of love.
Truth was, the ever honorable Tal Rigel would take the favors of a gifted Psyclid but would put a Princess Royal on a pedestal so high that he wouldn't get any closer than bowing distance.
When he knew, she'd lose him.
The birds were singing again, insects on the move, but Kass's comm unit remained silent. A glance at her handheld showed a blank screen. The afternoon wore on. Psyclid's government in exile, ha! Sitting alone in a g'zebo in the woods, waiting for Tal Rigel to blink. Not only was he ignoring her, she was so far from exerting her authority she hadn't even ordered the cleaning of the secret passages.
With resignation, Kass stood and walked back to the palace, head high. She might feel as low as the krall, but no one else was going to know it. In spite of Zee-Zee's advice, Tal was going to have to make the next move. Princesses never blinked.
Kass was enjoying the last delicious bites of a white pudding topped by sliced fresh moonberries when the summons finally came. Not from Tal but from one of his aides. A meeting in one hour. In the Green Salon.
Business then, not pleasure. Was this Tal's blink, an excuse to ease into seeing her while hiding behind the protection of others in the room?
If so . . . if he really was drunk because they'd quarreled, she just might forgive him. After all, nothing in Tal's attitude even remotely suggested he knew she was L'ira. He had, in fact, never failed to go all Fleet captain and look down his nose every time she tried to tell him what to do.
And if he'd bothered to research her background, he would have found only the Kass Kiolani created by a team of experts. A girl of good, but not noble, family, born and educated in Psyclid City. In order to identify her as L'ira, Tal would have had to run facial recognition on every female Psyclid between the ages of twenty and thirty. And, after all, he himself had said he respected her secrets. And she believed him.