“So I was faced with a tough decision: defeat the king of all sharks, or save my crew. Reluctantly, I released my fishing pole and let the shark drag it into the inky depths. Then we scrambled to our stations to escape.”
Is this guy for fucking real? Not sure what amazes me more. That he’s able to spout off all this horseshit with a straight face, or that Angie’s watching him with wide eyes and her sexy little mouth half open.
“How did you get away?” Angie’s playing right into his hands. I give her a quick kick under the table, but she ignores me. Really? I’ll stream Jaws for her if she wants a crazy shark story. It’s probably just as real.
Chuck’s only happy to keep on spewing crap. “This is where the story gets really incredible. It looked bad. Real bad. Our ship wasn’t quick enough to get away, and at the rate the pirates were coming, we realized running was impossible. We were just getting out harpoon guns, flare pistols and anything else we could conceivably use for a weapon, when something happened that I’ve never seen the likes of and probably never will again.
“The closest boat was just about to come into boarding range, when the water exploded underneath it. Surging out of the ocean like a watery demon hell-bent on revenge, the same goddamn shark we’d been fighting for the last hour surfaced with the boat in its very jaws! I’m not joking when I say it almost capsized us, and launched them a full twenty feet into the air. When it struck the water, their boat broke clear in two.
“The other boats stopped, their crews yelling in panic. Like the demons they are, they left their buddies to their watery deaths, turned and raced off as fast as their overpowered engines would take them. Even then, they weren’t quite fast enough. The shark nailed another one, capsizing it and spilling everyone onboard into the water. It was the craziest damn sight I’ve seen in my whole life, but without that shark, I might not be sitting here today, and that’s the truth.”
“Oh Chuck, that’s amazing. You must’ve been terrified.” When I see her put her hands on his jacket sleeve, that’s enough. Maybe she thinks I’m an ass, but I’m not going to sit here while she fawns over a bullshitter like him, just because he’s got more stripes on his sleeve than I do.
So I pinch her ass again.
“Yow!” She turns to me and hisses in a sharp whisper. “What the hell is your problem?”
Putting my hand on her thigh, I grip it tightly, whispering back. “My problem is that you’re a piss-poor fiancée. If we’re going to pull this off, we can’t let them figure out that we’re not our parents.”
She gives me a look like she thinks I’m an idiot. “What, are the cruise line ninjas hiding under our table or something? Why on earth would they even suspect anything?” She frowns. “At least Chuck’s entertaining, which is more than I can say for you. You can sit and brood all you want, but I’m at the Captain’s table, and I’m going to enjoy it.” And with that she turns back to him.
Fuck that. “Babe.” I pinch her ass again. When she turns this time, I’m ready, sliding one hand to her waist and the other behind her head, forcing her to lean towards me. Meeting her between our chairs, I cover her lips with mine. Fuck, she tastes good.
She struggles, but only for a second. I want to think that it’s my amazing kiss, but she’s probably just remembered who we’re supposed to be. Gripping her tightly, I claim her mouth. It’s mine, like the rest of her, even if she doesn’t know it yet.
But then it’s like a dam breaks. Her hands come around me, and instead of just putting up with my kiss, she meets it, melting into my arms. Our tongues dance while I forget the whole fucking room, the Captain, everything. Her eyes close, but I can’t keep my gaze off her beautiful face. Sliding my hand up along her side, tracing her delicious curves, I want to tear that dress off right here and now and I don’t fucking care how much it cost.
When we finally part, both of us breathing hard, her whole face is flushed and her eyes intent on mine. It’s the kind of look I want to see beneath me, a look that says, “Fuck me again.” My cock strains against my pants, so I hope we’re getting dessert. I’m going to need a little time before standing.
She chews her lower lip and our eyes remain locked for several long seconds. The spell’s broken when I hear an excited little clap behind me. It’s Joyce, staring at us with the most gleeful expression that borders on crazy. “You kids are so adorable! What did I tell you, right? Tongues.”
Angie pulls away from me, looking embarrassed, but... pleased? She turns back to the captain with a mysterious smile on her lips. Soon she’s back to listening to his tall tales, but this time it doesn’t bother me so much. This dinner needs to end, though. Soon.