"Why?"
"It's all I know." He'd been averting his gaze; now it snapped back to her for a brief moment and he grabbed his truck keys off the counter. "Ready to go?"
Bundled in his heather-gray sweatshirt that not only covered her ass but hung halfway to her knees, allowing only the merest flutter of her dress to show underneath the band, she climbed in his truck and buckled up, feeling at odds with herself. The excitement and magic of last night was in ashes now, replaced with the towering brick wall of reality-and she had just careened madly into it.
There was nothing for them. The lifetime she'd romantically contemplated earlier was some alternate reality where Tommy was still alive. That reality wasn't here, and it damn sure wasn't now.
The hour back to Houston turned out to be closer to two; early morning traffic was heavy heading into the city. It felt like forever. They largely spent it wrapped in a terrible, aching silence while Savannah watched the buildings and cars whiz maniacally by as Mike navigated the freeways with all the kamikaze skill and confidence of someone who'd been driving here his entire life. Whenever she glanced at him, his face was like stone, his hands gripping the wheel so hard one good yank would probably tear it from the dash.
He felt it too, then.
Maybe later it wouldn't hurt so much. Later, after she spent time with Rowan, after she witnessed more of her sister-in-law's bad days, after she experienced a few of her own. She still had them, those moments when she heard something funny and almost called Tommy to tell him about it. And then she would remember, and it was almost as if his death had just happened all over again.
None of that was Mike's fault. She believed that, or she couldn't have let last night happen. But it would be much easier to deal with losing what might have been now that she knew what true loss felt like. Nothing else could come close to that. It would be all right. She could deal.
"What are you doing today?" Mike asked at last, the first time either of them had really spoken since leaving Galveston.
"Shopping, I guess. Rowan wanted to go to the Galleria."
He nodded and took an exit, getting ever closer to the hotel and goodbye. Her heart was in her throat all of a sudden. "What about you?"
"Home. Maybe more sleep."
"Oh, definitely. That sounds nice. Maybe she'll sleep until noon so I can catch a nap." Though it would be even nicer with you for a pillow.
"I can get you a car for later, if you want."
"Nah, we'll Uber. Thank you, though." And all too soon he pulled up outside her hotel. She sat staring at the entrance, knowing she should open the door and run, but unable to do so. Frozen to her seat, she drew a deep breath and turned her head to find him looking at her. "I don't want to go in," she said softly.
In a burst of motion that startled her, he surged across the bench seat to catch her face between his hands, kissing her until her breath burned through her lungs and her already sore, well-fucked body weakened and pleaded with her to reconsider all of this. To say to hell with reality and live the fantasy just a little while longer, no matter what anyone thought. "Tonight," he practically growled into her ear just before nipping the lobe with his teeth. "Let me see you again tonight, Savannah."
Tonight? What about now?
"Okay," she said stupidly as he sucked a patch on her neck until it stung like her lips did from the pressure of his kisses. His hand rode up her bare thigh to tease sweetly between her legs, at odds with the fire and force everywhere else he touched her. Her muscles jumped, tightening everywhere as she clutched at his head. Her nipples chafed against the ruched bodice of her dress underneath his sweatshirt. "Oh God."
"Open," he commanded, and she did, heaven help her, right there at the front entrance where anyone might walk out, but at least they were up fairly high in his truck so they wouldn't be able to see what he was doing.
What he was doing was working his fingers inside her, finding her wet and ready for more of him. Sinking her teeth into her bottom lip, Savannah let her head roll back on the seat with his devastating come-hither motions robbing her of thought, blinding her, making her ears ring. Shutting the world out. He had that effect on her and something tried to whisper to her pleasure-drunk mind that it wasn't a good thing. She was beyond hearing any voices of reason, moving her hips with him, seeking the release hovering just out of her reach . . . there, just there, almost . . .
His thumb brushed her clit and she was gone. Writhing, clutching him, sinking her teeth into his muscular shoulder so she wouldn't cry out. When he'd wrung every last spasm from her spent, shaking body, he gently pulled his hand away and her eyes flew open. It was as if a spell had been lifted, one that turned her into someone she scarcely knew. But damn, did it feel good. Every inch of her had skin broken out in gooseflesh as the heat rushed out of her, and she was glad for the warmth of his hoodie. And of his kiss when at last it wandered back to her lips, sweet and reassuring after that whirlwind orgasm.
"I want to take you out," he said, stroking her cheek. Lost in the sea of his stormy blue eyes right then, she feared she would never be able to deny him anything he wanted.
"I'd like that."
"Can you can get away? I don't want to keep you from Rowan, but . . ." Those fabulous lips teased a line along her jaw. "I do want to keep you."
Giggling softly, she stroked his hair, enjoying the feel of his mouth on her. Okay, so . . . one more night. Tomorrow she had to leave him. There was no denying that, no stopping it. Might as well go on enjoying herself while she was here, if she could. "I'm here for her, though, okay? If she wants to do something, then I have to go with her. I just doubt she will."
"Understood."
But Savannah was already wearing what she'd planned to wear today and would have to wear today what she'd planned to wear tomorrow. What the hell would she wear to dinner? She hadn't expected any of this, but at least she had a day of shopping to figure it out.
"You feel too good to let go," he murmured, and she slid her arms around his neck, letting him hold on as long as he wanted because she was right there with him in not wanting to let go. Soaking in everything about him she could: the feel of his stubble against her tender flesh, the steady rhythm of his breathing, the strong throb of his heart. How was she going to get through the day?
The day had begun, though, whether they liked it or not. She climbed cautiously down from Mike's truck still wearing his hoodie, since he told her to keep it, and stood watching amid the morning bustle until his truck turned a corner and was gone from sight. He'd wanted to walk her to her hotel room door, but she'd thought it too risky in case Rowan was up seeking breakfast. Fat chance given last night, but it would be just her luck to get caught making this walk of shame. She wasn't quite sure how she might explain returning to her room this morning wearing the same dress she'd worn last night under a sweatshirt that was three sizes too big, but it would be easier than explaining it when the accomplice was at her side.
Ten minutes later, she was snuggled under the covers alone in her blissfully silent room, wearing the oversize T-shirt she'd packed to sleep in but still snuggled with Mike's hoodie. It smelled like his beach house, like his truck, like him.
Rowan yawned through a late breakfast, bleary eyed but adorable and dressed for a day of shopping. She had called at half past ten to wake Savannah from the deepest sleep she could remember in ages. By noon, the two of them were walking beneath the curved glass roof of the Houston Galleria. Rowan fell in love with a pair of Alexander McQueen sandals at Nordstrom that Savannah tried diligently to talk her out of.
"You know your feet are going to swell and you aren't going to be able to wear them," she warned as Rowan admired them in the mirror and the saleslady gave Savannah the evil eye as she no doubt contemplated a lost commission.
"They won't swell forever, silly."
"Mom always said her foot was a full size bigger after she had Tommy."
"Seriously?"
"Yep."
"Well . . . shit. Sorry," she quickly added to the lady helping her, her hand going to her mouth. "I think I'll take them anyway, though. I simply must have a souvenir from this trip."