“Someone like Kayla?”
“Yes! I mean, would it kill her to go to a gym once in a while? Still, she does have a sweet personality, and I suppose men can like that kind of thing. I just expected you with someone sexier, someone who would fit into your world and make life easier for you.”
“Someone like you, you mean?”
“Well, we did have quite a night together back—”
“I was drunk off my ass or I never would have crashed at your place, Rachel. Listen, I have to go. Kayla and I have plans this evening.”
“Oh, of course. Though, I would like to meet with you and discuss a few things. It’s rather important.”
“What could we possibly have to talk about?”
“I’d rather not get into it over the phone. I’ll be in town next week. I was hoping I could come by. I could fix you dinner and we could talk.”
“I don’t think there’s anything we need to say to each other. However, if you come into town, as my fiancée’s sister, I’d be glad to take you and Kayla out to dinner.”
“Your fiancée??”
“Of course, that’s if Kayla wants to go to dinner with you. Now, if you don’t mind, I need to get back to her,” I add, hanging up the phone and barely resisting throwing it across the room.
“Your fiancée??” This comes from Kayla instead of Rachel now, and I turn around to look at her. For some reason, I feel defensive.
“Definitely.”
“I thought this was—”
“I’ve told you and told you that what we’ve been doing isn’t temporary, Kayla.”
“Did you seriously just tell me we’re getting married? Actually, scratch that. Did you seriously just tell my sister that we were getting married before you even mentioned it to me?”
“What’s the point of telling you? You wouldn’t believe me, anyway.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?”
“Sweetheart, you’ve spent half our relationship justifying in your mind why I’m sleeping with you and how I feel about you.”
“I haven’t said—”
“You don’t have to. It’s there in every reaction you have, in the way you are with me, everything.”
“Well, if it annoys you, maybe—”
“Stop it, Kayla.”
“What? I’m just saying that if—”
“You annoy me. You infuriate me. You also make me laugh. You make me happy. You make a bad day better. You give me purpose. You give me peace and you also—”
“White,” she whispers, her eyes overly bright.
“You also love me.”
“I…”
“And that’s great. In fact, it’s fucking awesome.”
“It is?” she asks, her voice strained, her face pale.
“It is. Because I love you.”
“White, you don’t have to say anything. I know you love me. We’ve been friends all of our lives.”
“Not as a friend, Kayla. Though I do love you like that too.”
“You love me,” she whispers, and she doesn’t say it like a question. Tears are slowly streaming from her eyes. I move into her, trying to catch them before they fall, but it’s useless.
“I love you,” I reassure her, close to panic. I never imagined that the first time I told a woman I loved her, she’d be crying.
“You love me,” she repeats.
“That’s not supposed to make you cry.”
“Why?” she asks, crying harder.
“Why what?” I respond, thoroughly confused.
“Why do you love me?”
“Sweetheart, what do you think we’ve been doing here?”
“Here?”
“Together.”
“I don’t know!” she cries like she’s completely lost. My heart squeezes, and by that, I mean I can physically feel the pain.
“You don’t know?” I’m not sure how to respond to that.
“I just figured I’d enjoy the ride however long it lasted.”
“However long it lasted? Are you nuts?”
“You agreed to this to help me get a child. You don’t even want kids. We’ve been friends all of our lives, but I’m not delusional.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“I’m not the kind of girl you normally go for, White.”
“What do you mean, kind?”
“Exactly that. I can’t hold a candle to the women you usually date. I knew going in that this was just temporary.”
“Wait. Hold up. Why in the fuck would you even compare yourself to anyone, Kayla? Jesus Fucking Christ! Don’t you get it?”
“Get what?”