Raging Hard(116)
“She got cancer when I was pretty young. I can’t say that I remember much of it, thankfully. I remember her when she wasn’t sick yet, playing with me by the ocean. And I remember her funeral. Other than that, I don’t remember much.”
“How was your dad after she passed?”
“Upset, obviously. But he didn’t show it. His first breakthrough documentary happened about a year after she was gone, and I think he threw himself into work around then.”
“Does he work a lot, your dad?”
“Yeah, he does. I mean, his job demands a lot of work, you know? He travels all the time.”
“Did you ever wish he was around more often?”
She shook her head. I gave Jess a look, not sure where she was going with this.
“Dad was around a lot more when I was still living in the house.”
“Tell me about his relationship with Lincoln’s mother.”
She laughed. “What’s there to say? They hit it off right when I was about to leave for school. Came a little out of nowhere though.”
“How well do you know her?”
“Pretty well. She’s a really lovely person.”
“Did your dad tell you about her before they announced the marriage?”
Aubrie paused, and I saw something pass across her face. Did Jess just hit a nerve?
I thought, but Brie composed herself quickly.
“No, he didn’t. I think he was afraid of how I’d react.”
“Why?”
“I don’t know. He probably thought I would be upset that he was moving on from Mom.”
“Were you?”
“Not at all. I was a teenager, but I wasn’t stupid. It had been years since Mom passed. Dad had every right to move on.”
Jess nodded and shuffled through her notes. “Tell me more about Jules.”
Aubrie laughed. “I don’t know. She’s gorgeous and sweet and seems to really care about everyone around her.”
“You haven’t lived in the same house as her, though, have you?”
“No. I’ve been away at school.”
“Why haven’t you come home before?”
Aubrie didn’t answer right away, and I saw that same expression cross her face. Jess was definitely hitting some kind of nerve, though I wasn’t sure exactly what it was.
“Same reason I didn’t,” I cut in, trying to give Aubrie a second to compose herself. “Some people don’t want to rely on their parents.”
Jess smiled tightly at me and then looked back at Aubrie. “Is that true?”
“Not exactly,” she said slowly. “It’s hard to explain.”
“Try. Take as long as you need.” Jess gave her a smile that was probably meant to be comforting, but she looked more like a jackal grinning at its dinner.
“It’s like, I don’t know,” she said slowly. “It’s like my dad didn’t need me anymore, you know? He had Jules and his films. I had a new life out there at school. I had something else.”
Jess looked at me. “Why did you stay away?”
I blinked at her. “I thought this was Brie’s interview.”
“Don’t dodge. Why did you move away and never come home?”
I looked at Aubrie and she cocked her head. I wanted to say, I left because of you. I left because if I stayed I would have done something stupid.
Instead, I gave my usual answer.
“Europe had what I wanted.”
“What did you want?”
“To feel alive. BASE jumping gave me that.”
She glanced down at her notes and then back at me. “There are rumors about girls.”
“Is that a question?”
“Okay, let me restate that. Are the rumors about you and all the women you slept with true?”
I laughed. I knew what rumors she was referring to. Nothing bad or crazy, just that I had slept with a ton of women while I moved around Europe.
“True, more or less. A lot of it is exaggerated.” I avoided looking at Brie.
“Why?”
I frowned at her. “What do you mean, why?”
“Why did you sleep around?”
“Because it felt good. Because it was better than the alternative.”
“And what’s the alternative?”
Jerking off to thoughts of my stepsister
, I thought.
“Not sleeping around, I guess.”
Aubrie made a noise, but I ignored it.
“Why did you need to go to Europe for all of this?”
“They have some of the best jumpers in the world. The sport just wasn’t big enough in the States at the time.”
“Aubrie, did you ever see Lincoln during this time?”
She shook her head. “Like I said before, we didn’t see each other at all until I came home this summer.”