Quicksilver Dreams(49)

                I also didn’t want to feel the pain of his earlier rejection and wanted to just shut off any thoughts or images of him.

                I was angry, believing you weren’t who I thought you were, and I wanted to hurt you. He was floating in front of me, not quite standing on the rocks. He’d followed me down to the water.

                Congratulations. It worked.

                Don’t you want to know what all this is about?

                Not really. Though I kinda did.

                Regardless, I need to tell you. I don’t believe the break-ins are a coincidence. You’re in danger, and until I eliminate the danger to you, you’re stuck with me.

                The hell I am. You aren’t going to know where I am. I’ve already got plans to move. I’m leaving the apartment and finding someplace where I can be left alone.

                I jumped and imagined soaring like a bird along the top of the water. Ryder had been right when he said you could do anything in a dream. I was skimming along the top, faster and faster. I did sharp turns, twirls, flips and caught an updraft back to the car I’d started my dream in. It was waiting for me at the top of the bluffs, sunlight shining off the glossy black paint.

                Ryder was leaning against it, looking scrumptiously hot and wickedly male with a pair of shades. My body still responded to him against my will, but I couldn’t outrun my hurt feelings. I couldn’t forget that he saw me as lesser. He needed to leave me alone, so I could get on with my life.

                I can’t leave you alone. His deep voice was a soft rumble. I... He frowned. His eyes seemed to be trying to tell me something that wouldn’t pass over his lips.

                What? I snapped.

                His expression turned to stone. He tightened his lips in a grim line. I need to take care of you.

                Gee, thanks for all that care. Even my dream voice was shaky with emotion. I got in my car. With as much sarcasm as I could muster, I said, Do me a favor and stop caring so much, okay? Stay away from me.

                Taylor, listen to me! Will you quit being so stubborn? I’m trying to protect you! His deep voice gently rolled over my spirit, making me want to melt, but I had to take a stand at some point, didn’t I? I couldn’t always be a walking target.

                You have a funny way of doing it. I’m going to go look for my mom. You aren’t invited.

                Leaving Ryder by the side of the bluffs, I continued down the long, lonely road by the ocean with the wind in my hair, the sun on my skin and tears on my cheeks. Maybe I could find that place of contentment in Key West that had allowed her to forget her worries. Maybe then I’d be okay. Where was she? Why did she leave me? I just wanted to be able to ask that question. What could I have done to make her stay?

                The road was long and continuous. It never ended, even though I always felt like I could see a destination in the distance. Like a mirage, a glint of sunlight glaring off something metal, some kind of city or town just ahead, prolonged my hope and kept me driving. I never seemed to get there though. The road just continued. Alone. Me and the road.

                A seagull swooped along lazily, catching updrafts and gliding without having to flap its wings, following me on this fruitless drive, and I silently thanked it for not giving up on me. It was the first time that a living creature had traveled with me in this dream.

                I couldn’t help but wish with all my heart that someone in the world would think I was special, but maybe there was the lesson. Maybe I needed to learn that I was special. And if I really learned it, maybe it would be enough.