"I don't know, Tasha," Alisha replied, choosing her words carefully. "I mean, he could be telling the truth, right? You saw that other girl come up behind him - it doesn't seem too far-fetched that he would assume it was you - that you'd come to find him - does it?"
I shrugged and shook my head. "I don't know. That's the whole problem - I just don't know."
"Did he seem like the type?" Alisha asked. "I mean, a lot of the time you just get a feeling from a guy, you know? You can just tell they're dogs sometimes."
I thought about that for a few seconds. But Kaden hadn't seemed that way, not with me. It was one of the reasons I was so shocked when I saw what I saw. "He didn't seem like that," I told Alisha. "I mean, it's not like I have a ton of experience with guys or anything but he seemed...sincere. You know?"
"Well," she said, ladling mashed potatoes into a serving dish. "Maybe you should meet up with him then? Just to talk. And if you get any bad vibes then you can just leave, no harm no foul."
"Yeah. I guess so. I told him I'd take his call, anyway, so we'll see."
That night, just as I was settling into bed, my phone chirped. I grabbed it. A message from Kaden:
"Hi Tasha. I thought it might be better to text, not sure how much you want to talk to me right now. But I do need to talk to you. So let me know what time tomorrow or the next day. I meant what I said about missing you. - K."
Chapter 17: Kaden
I didn't like the look on Tasha's beautiful face when I saw her - before she saw me - seated at a table at the coffee shop where we were meeting. I already didn't like the fact that she'd insisted we meet on neutral ground, somewhere where we wouldn't be alone. It just didn't bode well, as far as I could see it. And that look. Not angry, but not happy, either. More resigned than anything.
When she saw me she looked up and gave me a small, tight smile.
"Hi Kaden."
"Hi," I replied, sitting down opposite her.
I thought there might be some small talk first but she just launched straight into it.
"So," she said, stirring her coffee and refusing to quite meet my eyes. "I've been thinking about what you said. And I still don't know, Kaden. I mean, how can I know if you're telling the truth? I can't, can I? But I guess I agreed to meet up because I'm willing to put this behind us. Maybe it was innocent, maybe-"
I leaned across the table towards her. "It was, Tasha. It was innocent. I promise you. I swear to you, straight-up, that what I told you was the truth - I thought Kelsey was you. As soon as I realized she wasn't, I stopped."
"OK," she said, softly. "OK, Kaden. I think I believe you. Maybe that's stupid of me but what you said made sense in a lot of ways. And if that's really what happened then I just want to say to you that I am sorry. I was really hurt. Like, I didn't even know it was possible to hurt that much. I trusted you and then I just felt so bad. I still feel bad."
"Why?" I asked her, tentatively hopeful based on what she was saying. If she believed me, there was hope, right?
"Because I just wasn't thinking. I mean, not after prom but before it, I guess. You're leaving - it'll only be a few weeks now, won't it?"
"Yeah. But I'm only going to be a few hours away, Tasha. I can drive home to see you every weekend. Or we can-"
"Kaden."
"What?"
"That isn't going to happen. Please don't start spinning fairytales about how we can have a relationship when you're three hours away at college and I'm still here in Little Falls with a full-time job and a lot of other responsibilities on top of that. Just, please, don't."
A little pit of dread had opened up in my stomach. She said she believed me - or, that she was willing to believe me, anyway. So why did her tone of voice, her expression, everything just feel like it was all about to end? "Spinning fairytales," I asked. "You think that's a fairytale? I can drive three hours no problem. You could come to my games-"
"Kaden!" She stopped me again, more forcefully that time. "I'm sure you're aware of how busy you're going to be with football, right? I mean, what makes you think your weekends are even going to be free? What makes you think mine are? Alisha's applying for a weekend job, which means I'll have to be home during the day to look after my niece - if she gets it, anyway. It just - it doesn't seem realistic. It seems like you're grasping at straws."
"And it seems to me like you're just looking for excuses," I told her, sounding more upset than I meant to. "If you don't believe me, Tasha, just say so. There's no need to go beating around the bush, pretending like this is about me going to college or whatever."