"You can take out student loans," Mrs. Foster replied. "I know it's a daunting idea but at least with a doctor's salary you have some hope of paying them back."
She still wasn't getting it. I knew she meant well, but I was starting to feel annoyed. "But my mom can't get student loans!" I exclaimed, leaning forward. "That's what I'm talking about. You're right that I can get them but what about my mom? What about my niece and my little sister? My brother can't support all of them!"
"You're going to have to make a choice. You're going to have to choose between following your own dreams and allowing your family to hold you back. And believe me, Tasha, I've been doing this a long time - if anyone has the potential to succeed it's you. I've never met someone your age with such determination. I just don't want to see you waste that. The world really is your oyster."
I kept my mouth shut because Mrs. Foster meant well and because she'd never been anything but supportive. But I could not agree with her assessment that my family was 'holding me back.' I wanted to ask her if she would go, in my position. If she would leave her own mother, her own family. But I already knew what the answer would be. Mrs. Foster didn't get it. A lot of people didn't get it. It wasn't their fault, but it would have been nice if they'd made just a little effort to understand that we didn't really live in the same world.
I left the meeting dejected, fighting the feeling that I was letting myself down somehow. No one really wanted to face the fact that me going to college would mean my mother losing the only home she'd known since her children were born, a shabby but impeccably kept little bungalow on the wrong side of town where she'd raised us after my father had left for good when I was five.
Such was my level of pre-occupation that I promptly walked smack into Kaden Barlow, Reinhardt High's star quarterback and the most popular guy in school, just outside the school doors.
"Hey!" He said, smiling his gorgeous, easy smile when he saw it was me. "Tasha Greeley. You still haven't learned to look where you're going, I see."
"Sorry," I mumbled, trying to push past him because I wasn't in the mood. He put himself in my path and wouldn't let me go.
"Jesus, slow down a sec, will you? Why do you always act like-" Kaden paused as soon as he got a look at my face. "Oh. Hey, Tasha. Is something wrong?"
I wasn't going to cry. There was no way I was going to cry. Not in front of Kaden Barlow, anyway. I took a deep breath and forced a smile. "Nope, nothing's wrong. I just have to be somewhere."
"Huh, OK. You sure?"
"Yup," I replied, keeping my voice steady and clear.
"Cool. So anyway, Tasha. I was wondering if you wanted to come to the game on Friday. The Reinhardt Tigers game. The, uh, the football team. I-"
"I know who the Tigers are, Kaden."
He looked at me sharply. "I know you know who they are. Why are you always so touchy, Tasha? I'm just trying to ask you to a football game."
He was excited about the game, I could hear it in his voice, that note of pride. Unfortunately, the last thing I wanted to do was go to a football game and watch all the cheerleaders falling all over themselves to get a few crumbs from Kaden's table. I didn't even know why he was asking me. Ever since that day in the parking lot it was like Mr. Popular couldn't handle the fact that there was one person on earth who didn't immediately fall in love the minute he gave them a moment of his time. There was also the fact that I had bigger things than football on my mind.
"I don't know," I said. "I think I'm working on Friday night."
Kaden stayed where he was, looking down at me (he was very tall, even at seventeen) for a few seconds like he wasn't sure if he was annoyed or amused. Finally, he said something.
"Why are you always such a pain in the ass, Tasha?"
"What?" I asked, glaring at him.
"I said, why are you always such a pain in the ass?"
"Oh I heard you," I replied, "I just don't understand what you're talking about and I'm not sure why you're being so rude."
Kaden laughed and that bothered me even more. The ego on him! I bet he never got turned down. It happens one time and he flips out? I wanted to tell him to grow up. But I also wanted to get home.
"Really?" Kaden asked, his voice dripping with skepticism. "Really, Tasha? You have no idea what I'm talking about?"
"No, I'm sorry, I don't." I snapped.
"Liar."
"Excuse me!?"
"Look," Kaden drawled, his posture completely relaxed like he knew it would get under my skin. "You've always been standoffish with me and I never could get why. Is it because of that incident in the parking lot back when we were kids? I mean, all I was trying to do was help. I guess I'm just not sure what your problem is, I've always tried to be nice to you."